求教

oxyzenUID：2563930

It is generally agreed that society benefits from the work of its members. Compare the contributions of artists to society with the contributions of scientists to society. Which type of contribution do you think is valued more by your society? Give specific reasons to support your answer.

There has been a discussion about which of two types of society members, artists or scientists contributes more to the development of society. The answers may vary from culture to culture, from person to person, however as far as I am concerned scientist, compared with artists, have made a greater contribution to our society.

First of all, in terms of meeting the basic needs of human beings, artists can not compete with the scientists who have significantly improved the living standard of people around the world. The fast development of science and technology which is the result of scientists’ efforts, has enhanced our ability to produce things. With the growing numbers of population in the world, the rice problem has become a serious one which if can not be solved in time, our surviving will be at risk. It is the advanced technology by agricultural scientists that has enormously increased the production of rice per acre and hence given human beings a short relief and more time to figure out a better way to ensure the good future of us. Unlike scientists, typical examples of artists’ production are songs, paintings, decorations and etc, things that serve the function of amusing people or improving people's mood. They are not directly linked to the productivity of necessities people use in the daily life.

Furthermore, scientists have created a more convenient world, facilitating the transportation and at the same time playing a part in the art prevailing process. The artists contribute to the society by bringing people fun and recreation, while scientists have enabled the fun be enjoyed by a larger range of people. The modern communication techniques changed the way we communicate with each other and made it available to all. A song or a movie produced by a famous artist in China might be enjoyed just after it has been released, not only in the country where the artist lives but also can be admired in the opposite side of the world. Scientist has given the artists more space to exhibit themselves.

From what have been discussed above, we can see that scientists and artists are different in the function they serve to the society. They are both indispensible part of the social development. However, if we have to decide which is a little bit more important, I would prefer scientists.

另外再请教一个问题，关于这种比较并要求说明更偏向哪一个的题目，怎么写比较好呢？是详细比较之后简单给个偏好的结论呢，还是简单比较，重点写原因？我看以前的TWE185的范文里好像前一种比较多。请mpromanus指教

hyacinthUID：2184492

这种题目现在iBT里不怎么考了。。。agree or disagree的题目偏多。。。

mpromanusUID：2565872

There has been a discussion about which of the two types of society members - artists or and scientists - contributes more to the development of society. The answers may vary from culture to culture, from person to person, however as far as I am concerned, scientist, compared with artists, have made a greater contributions to our society.

First of all, in terms of meeting the basic needs of human beings, artists cannot compete with the scientists who have significantly improved the living standards of people around the world. The fast development of science and technologies which is the result of scientists’ efforts, and has enhanced our ability to produce things (What things? Trash?). With the growing numbers of population (population这个词本身就是一个‘人口数目’的意思，所以没有number of population这种说法了) in the world, the rice problem (What problem? 米不够吃? 米不好吃? 米没营养? 你需要更清晰的表达 - the lack of rice) has become a serious one which, if cannot be solved in time, our survival will be at risk.(美国人不会对世界大米产量不足感到有什么直接问题的..米产量特别重要是因为以大米为主食的发展中国家人口数量非常庞大, 饿死了就没有人给美国人供应廉价商品了..而不是因为没有大米所有的人都要饿死..) It is the advanced technology developed by agricultural scientists that has enormously increased the production of rice per acre and hence given human beings a short relief and more time to figure out a better way to ensure the a good future of us. Unlike scientists, typical examples of artists’ productions are songs, paintings, decorations and etc, things that serve the function of amusing people or improving people's moods. They are not directly linked to the production of necessities people use in the daily lives.

Furthermore, scientists have created a more convenient world (convenient的意思是 能让事情变得容易，而不是形容事情本身的容易. convenient和easy/simple不能随便互换! 已经见过很多次这么滥用近义词的了), facilitating the transportation and at the same time playing a part in the art prevailing (?) process. The artists contribute to the society by bringing people fun and recreation, while scientists have enabled the fun to be enjoyed by a larger range of people. The modern communication techniques changed the way we communicate with each other and made it (What?) available to all. A song or a movie produced by a famous artist in China might be enjoyed just after it has been released, not only in the country where the artist lives but also can be admired in the opposite other side of the world. Scientist has given the artists more space to exhibit themselves (If you 'exhibit' a person, you literally show this person to people. Artists may exhibit themselves, yes, in 行为艺术, but generally they only 'express themselves'.).

From what have been discussed above, we can see that scientists and artists are different in the functions they serve to the society. They are both indispensible parts of the social development. However, if we have to decide which is a little bit more important, I would prefer scientists. (You don't need to LIKE scientists before you can think that their achievements are more important. A simple 'choose' will do.)

总结:

Compare的部分做得不错。语言偶尔还是会有不太地道的地方，请注意。

关于是多比较还是少比较，其实题目里问的哪个贡献比较大就是比较之后的自然结果，所以其实在比较的时候你已经在暗示原因了。鉴于此，现在这个组织结构就很不错，两段带倾向的比较，然后声明自己的结论。最后一段可以在声明结论之后再总结重复一下前面比较过程中讨论的优劣，这样就把论点和比较的部分呼应起来了。