issue43 第一篇习作 ,渴望大家的砖头

efficientbillUID: 180781

看了老美范文后写的，感觉思路有点受到局限，希望大家能够给些意见，谢谢了！

TOPIC: ISSUE43 - "To be an effective leader, a public official must maintain the highest ethical and moral standards."


Should a public official maintain the highest ethical and moral standards in order to be an effective leader as the speaker contends?Personally I tend to agree with the speaker for high ethical and moral leaders always pose positive effects on many respects of our society.

In the realm of business ,a leader with high moral standard is often defined as someone who can make the maximum profit to his shareholders or other owners,this is especially true ,because leaders who lacks the quality of honesty and integrity will soon be dismissed by his cooperators and emplyees.Besides ,a genuine leader would not only concern with his wokers' performences but their private life such as financial crisis and something emotional ,he always show great respects to his staffs and trying every possible means to reform their working conditions."Google",the famous worldwide searching engine company serves as an apt illustration here.Considering that their employees always working under great pressure, the leader wisely figures out an idea which involves the modification of their working environment ,it seems that the company takes the form of a play garden and people who works for the company could always enjoys a sense of living in their own families.Therefore, no matter how much pressure they endure , no complaint could be heard, and the leader's ethical and moral standard naturally enhanced.

In the political world ,it is necessary even desirable for the political leaders to maintain a high morality,for it always has something to do with the nation's reputation and credibility,and it is related to whether the goverment's policy could be accepted.Hitler, who was regarded as the egregious violator of the public morality,forfeited his leadership as a result of immoral means to obtain his power.Even now when people casually pick up this topic, a sense of abhorrence toward his autocratic policy arouses.

However , a public figures are not moralists, they will make mistake as we do and personal morality is sometimes unrelated to political leadership.Clinton used to be accused of his sexual scandal ,but after this affair , he maintained extraordinary high approval ratings for the job he was doing,president Kennedy experienced the marital indiscretion ,but few would agree that this moral choice had brought adversely consequence to him.Only through mistakes we become psychologically mature ,physically strong and morally advanced.

In sum ,as to the public figures themselves , maintaining a high ethical and morality always serves as an impetus to create a high-profile in the majorities’ mind, while as to us, we shouldn’t be too captious on their moral performances for the sake that “to err is human ,to forgive is divine.”

goodgoodstudyUID: 201753

Should a public official maintain the highest ethical and moral standards in order to be an effective leader as the speaker contends? Personally I tend to agree with the speaker for（语法错误，改because） high ethical and moral leaders always pose positive effects on many respects of our society.第一段开门见山陈述自己的观点,同意issue所述.

In the realm of business ,a leader with high moral standard is often defined as someone who can make the maximum profit to his shareholders or other owners,this is especially true ,because leaders who lacks the quality of honesty and integrity will soon be dismissed by his cooperators and emplyees.(不明白你为什么直接就说在商业领域可能出现这种状况呢？high ethical 和 moral standards是赚大钱的直接原因吗？)Besides ,a genuine leader would not only concern with his wokers' performences but their private life such as financial crisis and something emotional ,he always show great respects to his staffs and trying every possible means to reform their working conditions."Google",the famous worldwide searching engine company serves as an apt illustration here.Considering that their employees always working under great pressure, the leader wisely figures out an idea which involves the modification of their working environment ,it seems that the company takes the form of a play garden and people who works for the company could always enjoys a sense of living in their own families.（这个例子不错）Therefore, no matter how much pressure they endure , no complaint could be heard, and the leader's ethical and moral standard naturally （be动词）enhanced.

In the political world ,it is necessary （and） even desirable for the political leaders to maintain a high morality,for it always has something to do with the nation's reputation and credibility,and it is related to whether the goverment's policy could be accepted.Hitler, who was regarded as the egregious violator of the public morality,forfeited his leadership as a result of immoral means to obtain his power.Even now when people casually pick up this topic, a sense of abhorrence toward his autocratic policy arouses.（自我感觉这个例子说得过于简单了）

However , a public figures are not moralists, they will make mistake as we do and personal morality is sometimes unrelated to political leadership.Clinton used to be accused of his sexual scandal ,but after this affair , he maintained extraordinary high approval ratings for the job he was doing,president Kennedy experienced the marital indiscretion ,but few would agree that this moral choice had brought adversely consequence to him.Only through mistakes we become psychologically mature ,physically strong and morally advanced.

In sum ,as to the public figures themselves , maintaining a high ethical and morality always serves as an impetus to create a high-profile in the majorities’ mind, while as to us, we shouldn’t be too captious on their moral performances for the sake that “to err is human ,to forgive is divine.”

感觉虎头蛇尾，还有就是楼主写长句的时候语法错误多

efficientbillUID: 180781

goodgoodstudy,非常感谢你中肯的批评!
其实我一直感觉自己在写作时语法存在很大问题,平时也不够重视
眼看还有一个月就要考了,还真是挺着急的...
无论怎样,还是要谢谢你的suggestion,下次写作一定努力改进!
ps:能不能留下你的习作链接啊,真的很想学习一下