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[求助] 5T同主题写作第4期 [复制链接]

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发表于 2006-4-26 22:27:46 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
Recently, the problem has been brought into focus that whether university students should be required for classes. Some people suggest that it should be an option for students, but others have a negative attitude. As far as I concern, I think the university students should be required to attend classes for the following reasons.

A notable case of this matter is that attending classes is more useful. Every student come to university want to gain more knowledge not only from the text books but also from the professor and other students in the classes. Every professor, before teaching students in the classroom, will read many books, relative papers and other things to prepare for the classes. During the classes, the professor will give the most important points of the information they prepared to the students. The students will never gain so many points only by reading alone in the library. So, attending classes is more useful.

Another important point we must consider is that learning knowledge from the classes could be more efficient. The students can get help from the professor and discuss with other students during the classes when they meet some problems. Many concepts in my major computer science is really complex such as compile and link. I cannot make differences when I first meet them in my text book. My professor made me clear in fifteen minutes while I cannot make it for the whole afternoon before. This case is not rare, in reality; frequently many students need help from the professors and other students in the classes. So, attending classes is more efficient.

Moreover, not all the students who do not go to classes will study by themselves. In a famous university Harbin Institute of Technology in China, 20% students did not attend the classes sometime. But in most cases, they will play computer games, sleep and do other things.

Draw a conclusion; attending classes is important for the students because it is useful and efficient, besides many students would not study by themselves off the classes. To put all into a nutshell, I agree that the university students should be required to attend the classes.
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发表于 2006-4-27 22:54:31 |只看该作者
Recently, the problem has been brought into focus that whether university students should be required for classes. Some people suggest that it should be an option for students, but others have a negative attitude. As far as I concern, as far as I am concerned, I think the 不要the university students should be required to attend classes for the following reasons.

A notable case case是指一个事实型的证据 应该不能用来表述你的观点 of this matter is that attending classes is more useful. Every student come who comes to university want wants to gain more knowledge not only from the text books but also from the professor professors 这里你应该不是在指某个特定的教授吧 and other students in the classes. Every professor, before teaching students in the classroom, will have read? 既然时间状语是before 这里应该不能用将来时 改成一般现在时或者完成时可能更好一点 read many books, relative papers and other things to prepare for the classes. During the classes, the professor will give the most important points of the information they prepared to the students. The students will never gain so many points only by reading alone in the library. So, attending classes is more useful.

Another important point we must consider is that learning knowledge from the classes could be more efficient. The students can get help from the professor and discuss with other students during the classes when they meet some problems. Many concepts in my major computer science is are really complex such as compile and link. I cannot make tell the difference? differences when I first meet them in my text book. My professor made me clear in fifteen minutes while I cannot make it for the whole afternoon before. This case is not rare, in reality; frequently many students need help from the professors and other students in the classes. So, attending classes is more efficient.

Moreover, not all the students who do not go to classes will study by themselves. In a famous university Harbin Institute of Technology in China, 20% students did not attend the classes sometime. But in most cases, they will play computer games, sleep and do other things. 这一段相较上面的两段 好单薄~~ 可以点出来为什么在这一点上 required 比optional 好;另外 你这一段的论证似乎是假设 optional classes的目的是让学生自学,这个假设并不是人人都认同的 所以如果你要攻击这一点 最好把假设明确的说出来

Draw a conclusion;这个。。。可以这样说的咩 attending classes is important for the students because it is useful and efficient, besides many students would not study by themselves off the classes. To put all into a nutshell, 呀 这句话真可爱 我喜欢~ 哈哈 I agree that the university students should be required to attend the classes.

嗯。。有一些小的语法错误 楼主应该先改掉了再发上来哦~~ 不然会被骂的啦~
赫赫
eland的论证过程有一点点曲线救国的感觉 特别是第二段
一起加油~~
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板凳
发表于 2006-4-28 19:07:22 |只看该作者
啊。。我的意思是 你的第二段里 useful是一个很抽象的词 我可以说一堂课很useful 因为它告诉我很多知识 也可以说一堂课很useful 因为它让我有所思考 还可以说一堂课很useful 因为它促进了同学之间的交流 实际上 useful可以涵盖你在这篇文章里要论证的三个方面 那么在这一段里 你到底要论证的是什么呢
你的真正意思“The students will never gain so many points only by reading alone in the library.” 被放在这一段的最后才说  这就像绕着圈子 最后才证到点子上
我们中国人的思维模式常常都是这样的 所以我们都是这么写中文的文章 但是美国人是直线思维的(就是大家常说的头脑简单啦~~ =P) 所以他们的论证才常常是开头就点出观点 在用很严谨的逻辑来证明
建议你看看胡敏的那本绿皮书 寄托有下的 我就是从那上面看到的 =)
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地板
发表于 2006-4-28 23:25:16 |只看该作者
dr_green说的比较有道理,我小改一下。
但是第三个理由段再写字数就太多了,只好算了
Recently, the problem has been brought into focus that whether university students should be required for classes. Some people suggest that it should be an option for students, but others have a negative attitude. As far as I am concerned, I think university students should be required to attend classes for the following reasons.

A notable case of this matter is that students can gain more knowledge by attending classes. Every student come to university wants to gain more knowledge not only from the text books but also from the professors and other students in the classes. Every professor, before teaching students in the classroom, has read many books, relative papers and other things to prepare for the classes. During the classes, the professor will give the most important points of the information they prepared to the students. The students will never gain so many points only by reading alone in the library. So, attending classes is more useful.

Another important point we must consider is that learning knowledge from the classes could be more efficient. The students can get help from the professor and discuss with other students during the classes when they meet some problems. Many concepts in my major computer science is really complex such as compile and link. I cannot tell the difference when I first meet them in my text book. My professor made me clear in fifteen minutes while I cannot make any sense about it for the whole afternoon before. This case is not rare, in reality; frequently many students need help from the professors and other students in the classes. So, attending classes is more efficient.

In addition, not all the students who do not go to classes will study by themselves. In a famous university Harbin Institute of Technology in China, 20% students did not attend the classes sometime. But in most cases, they will play computer games, sleep and do other things.

Draw a conclusion; attending classes is important for the students because it is useful and efficient, besides many students would not study by themselves off the classes. To put all into a nutshell, I agree that the university students should be required to attend the classes.

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发表于 2006-4-29 00:26:29 |只看该作者
最后一段有两个总结词,似乎不大好吧,而且怎么能直接用draw a  conclusion呢,语法错误啊,加个to吧
不过写得蛮不错的,看看我的吧
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... &extra=page%3D4

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RE: 5T同主题写作第4期 [修改]

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