argument38 写得太摸版了,大家来看看啊

paburawUID: 2204657

TOPIC: ARGUMENT38 - The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.

"An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism."
WORDS: 393          TIME: 上午 12:29:34          DATE: 2006-7-16
第一，一年去两次医院并不代表得病就少啊。由于感冒是小病，可能很多人得了感冒只是自己在家里吃药，而不是选者去看病，另外没有和其他地区做对比，可能其他地方的人去医院的次数更少

第二，就算是那边人比较少感冒。没有证明吃鱼和预防感冒的关系，感冒和很多因素有关，如气候，传染源等等。而且东部和西部的气候不同，可能那边的气候更暖和，那么那边的人即使不爱吃鱼一样会比较少得感冒。


第三，作者也没有证明吃要和吃鱼能起到一样的效果，因为没有证据显示到底是鱼中的哪种成分使人们的抵抗力增加。

第四，虽然感冒是请假的原因，但是不排除有很多人只是把感冒当是一个借口而已，通常这样比较容易请到假，

The author of this memo suggests that people use Ichthaid daily to prevent colds, which in turn lowers absenteeism. To bolster this suggestion, the author employs the evidence that in the East Meria, residents like eating fish, as a result, people visit the doctor fewer times per year. And Ichthaid is a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil which would as the same function as eating fish. Nevertheless, this memo is specious in several respects.

To begin with, the author does not provide convinced evidence that cold rate in East Meria is less than other places. Common sense and experience tells us that people who catch cold do not necessarily go to hospital; they can also take medicine themselves. Furthermore, the argument does not provide statistic evidence of other place, perhaps in which cold rate is less than East Media. Either of case, if true, would undermine the assumption that cold rate in East Media is lower regardless of eating fish or not.

Even assuming that the cold rate in East Media is actually lower that other places, the author fails to establish a causal relationship between eating fish and preventing colds. As we know, many aspects, such as weather, bacteria and virus, conditions of people's immunity function, contribute to incidence of cold. There is a good chance that East Meria and West Meria differ in weather as much, the former's weather is warmer and drier than the latter and thus have less incidence of cold.

Moreover, granted that the arguer can substantiate the foregoing assumptions, the effects of Ichthaid in preventing colds is open to doubt. Since the argument contains no evidence about which kind of substance is responsible for reducing opportunity for catching cold, we have good reason to suspect that this substance does not include in Ichthaid, especially considering that it only derive from fish oil, rather than the whole fish.

Final and not least, the author assumes that preventing colds would result in lowering absenteeism. Unfortunately, this is not necessarily the case. Some people who absent to work or school only use the cold as a pretext, if this is the real case, although people take Ichthaid daily and as such have less opportunities to catch colds, the absenteeism rate would remain the same as before.

In sum, this argument is not well-reasoned as it stands. The author of this memo may be a propagandist serving for the company which produces Ichthaid, and he wants to use this memo to suggest West Meria Public Health Council to advise people to take Ichthaid daily, but unfortunately, based on this memo alone, it is more probable that his suggestion would not be taken.

rockmeUID: 2202320

The author of this memo suggests that people use Ichthaid daily to prevent colds, which in turn lowers absenteeism. To bolster this suggestion, the author employs the evidence that in the East Meria, residents like eating fish, as a result, people visit the doctor fewer times per year. And Ichthaid is a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil which would as the same function as eating fish. Nevertheless, this memo is specious in several respects.

To begin with, the author does not provide convinced（convincing） evidence that cold rate（the incidence of colds） in East Meria is less than other places. Common sense and experience tells us that people who catch cold do not necessarily go to hospital; they can also take medicine themselves. Furthermore, the argument does not provide statistic evidence of other place, perhaps in which cold rate is less than East Media. Either of case,（看起来有些别扭哦，是不是case该改成复数？） if true, would undermine the assumption that cold rate in East Media is lower regardless of eating fish or not.

Even assuming that the cold rate in East Media is actually lower that（than） other places, the author fails to establish a causal relationship between eating fish and preventing colds. As we know, many aspects, such as weather, bacteria and virus, conditions of people's immunity function, contribute to （the） incidence of cold. There is a good chance that East Meria and West Meria differ in weather as much, the former's weather is warmer and drier than the latter and thus have（has） less incidence of cold.

Moreover, granted that the arguer can substantiate the foregoing assumptions, the effects of Ichthaid in preventing colds is open to doubt. Since the argument contains no evidence about which kind of substance is responsible for reducing opportunity for catching cold, we have good reason to suspect that this substance does not include in Ichthaid, especially considering that it only derive（s） from fish oil, rather than the whole fish.

Final and not least, the author assumes that preventing colds would result in lowering （lowering adj.使低劣的, 减少体力的, 昏暗的，这里应该直接用名词形式吧）absenteeism. Unfortunately, this is not necessarily the case. Some people who absent to work or school only use the cold as a pretext, if this is the real case, although people take Ichthaid daily and as such have less opportunities to catch colds, the absenteeism rate would remain the same as before.

In sum, this argument is not well-reasoned as it stands. The author of this memo may be a propagandist serving for the company which produces Ichthaid, and he wants to use this memo to suggest West Meria Public Health Council to advise people to take Ichthaid daily, but unfortunately, based on this memo alone, it is more probable that his suggestion would not be taken.

pablo你写的真好啊，我看的都自卑啊，句子运用的很灵活，很流畅，逻辑思路也挺全面的，几个大的方面都考虑到了，论证过程衔接的也挺自然，（不像偶，只抓到小问题说说说···）表达的意思也很清楚，得多向你学习拉～基本没找到什么问题～