Issue154 【CSMY作文互改小组】第一次作业

candyganUID: 201665

TOPIC: ISSUE154 - "Both parents and communities must be involved in the local schools. Education is too important to leave solely to a group of professional educators."
DATE: 2006-12-30
Abstract:
教育十分重要，它是一个培养人的过程。所以所有力量都应该参与进来。
1、在当今专业化的社会里，教师作为一种职业，特别是对于学生智力的培养有着很大的作用。
2、在日常道德行为及性格培养方面，父母对于孩子的培养比起教师更为重要。反例：留守儿童因为缺少父母的关爱容易出现冷漠孤僻等性格缺陷。
3、无论在技能实践还是道德培养方面，社区能提供的很多。比如：社区联系企业助于技能实践。
总之，教育的目的是培养一个完整的人。当全部力量都参与进来时并相互协作，才能最大限度地达到教育的目标。

Article:

When education is considered of complexity and importance, all sorts of
effort-- professional educators or parents, or communities--should be involved in it.

To begin with, as in a specialized society today,  professional educators plays asignificant role in education, especially in schooling. For elementary and middle school, the teachers have been trained in specialized subjects for giving the students more qualified abilities on literacy, numeracy and so on. In college and university, this kind of specialization is more significant.
Professors gain deeper knowledge in their fields, giving a broader view on different
disciplines to students. Generally, as it is referred to intelligent education, professional educators do a better job than parents and so forth.  
     
Not only professional educators play an important role in the process of education, but also the parents, especially when it comes to moral education, are of more significance than the teachers. One of examples is an opposite illustration to this problem: there are almost 20 million children in China that stayed at home alone in county due to their parents’ jobs. There is an old saying: "Experience is better than precept". Lacking parents’ intimate love, the moral education is a big problem for these children; only through parents’ care and behaviors can the children learn the basic virtue.

Furthermore, communities also contribute to education. For instance, communities can give a bigger space for students’ career practice. A long-run activity called “Try a career” from my community is to organize local companies and other institutions to provide job exercitation for students in local school. Many students in Number 2 Middle School (one of schools in my community) showed a highly passion to take part into this activity. A girl I known said: “I got a part-time-job at the hospital nearby, now my nurse dream can come true .” Through
this way, lots of students would get an better understanding of their future career choice.

As the famous Britain philosopher Herbert Spencer said,“The goal of education is to prepare for a perfect life". Since a perfect life means everything for a student, every effect--his or her parents, the communities and the teachers--should all be engaged in and worked with each other in this process.   

[ 本帖最后由 candygan 于 2007-1-6 20:12 编辑 ]

lyuzheUID: 2273307

When education is considered of complexity and importance, all sorts of
effort-- professional educators or parents, or communities--should be involved in it.

To begin with, as in a specialized society today,  professional educators plays [play]asignificant role in education, especially in schooling. For elementary and middle school, the teachers have been trained in specialized subjects for giving the students more qualified abilities on literacy, numeracy and so on. In college and university, this kind of specialization is more significant.
Professors gain deeper knowledge in their fields, giving a broader view on different
disciplines to students. Generally, as it is referred to intelligent education, professional educators do a better job than parents and so forth.  
     
Not only professional educators play an important role in the process of education, but also the parents, especially when it comes to moral education, are of more significance than the teachers. One of examples is an opposite illustration to this problem: there are almost 20 million children in China that stayed at home alone in county due to their parents’ jobs. There is an old saying: "Experience is better than precept"[preception?]. Lacking parents’ intimate love, the moral education is a big problem for these children; only through parents’ care and behaviors can the children learn the basic virtue.

Furthermore, communities also contribute to education. For instance, communities can give a bigger space for students’ career practice. A long-run activity called “Try a career” from my community is to organize local companies and other institutions to provide job exercitation for students in local school. Many students in Number 2 Middle School (one of schools in my community) showed a highly passion to take part into this activity. A girl I known said: “I got a part-time-job at the hospital nearby, now my nurse dream can come true .” Through
this way, lots of students would get an better understanding of their future career choice.

As the famous Britain philosopher Herbert Spencer said,“The goal of education is to prepare for a perfect life". Since a perfect life means everything for a student, every effect--his or her parents, the communities and the teachers--should all be engaged in and worked[cooperated] with each other in this process.
   
楼主你好，首先为我没能及时给你改作文说声抱歉。前两天确实有些事情，今后会按时的。看了你的文章，第一感觉就是很有层次。从智力培养的角度说明了教育者的重要性，从感情的角度说了父母的重要性，以及从实践的角度说了社会的重要性。我觉得论证的很合理。只是觉得在分别展开的时候力度不够，比如从父母的角度，我觉得应该深入展开一下，就这个反例是不是在分析一下更好呢？ 反正感觉就是角度很好，但缺乏令人十分信服的论证。

candyganUID: 201665

我今天才看到你的回复！谢谢你的建议！我会好好再改改的！