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[活动] COMEON作文小组——jimibt 2008 10月22日作业 [复制链接]

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发表于 2008-10-23 14:08:44 |显示全部楼层
Lots of projects want to get sponsorship from government,like art and athletics.As the money of government is from  taxpayers, the administration should consider seriously their interests when dealing the money.From the taxpayers' view,governments should give arts more money than athletics.

First,for most activities of athletics are far from people's daily lives,it is not necessary to donate much money to them.As I know,there are only small number of athletes in these sports,like  running,swimming,throwing balls,etc.These projects-except basketball,football,baseball,and so on-take up a great part of athletics.As those athletes' objects are achieving best score in the competition,even Olympic Games.What they do can not promote health status of individual,which is a large responsibility to the government. In other words, government should take the money from the  taxpayer to  make measures to raise health conditions of mass people,not the accomplishment of  a few athletes.

Second,there are other ways from which athletics can get lots of money,like TV,advertisement and rich men. I can always hear that some famous NBA players have tremendous salary.Like these players,some other athletics also have big money contract in football,baseball and so on. And In other fields,like running,athletes also can get a lot of money from advertisement.So it is not necessary for government to give money to them.

When it to comes to art,it can give much fun to individual when enjoying art.There are many forms of art people can enjoy,like popular music,film,modern drama.As government is responsible to increase people's happiness,so they should support these activities by giving much money.Another aspect is that government should also pay much attention to the teenager's art education.As the mass basic education is profitless,so it also needs the government's help.

Art also gives a way to express the thoughts  of the mass and reflect the dirty aspect of the society.We can see many excellent art works to do so,like film,paintings,modern dramas.In Chaplin's film,we can find the American assembly line worker's repetitive and tedious operations,which influences harmfully to the everyday life.And it also attract the government and people's attention to the worker's treatment.Another case is stage drama,there are many good satire stories to reflect the bad things of society,like corruptions.Nonetheless, there may be small groups of people lie them,so they requires a great
support.As It have great values to society,so government should support them too.

In conclusion,art offers the society more value than athletics,and some kinds of art  need to be supported. So government should give more money to arts.


[ 本帖最后由 jimibt 于 2008-10-23 14:17 编辑 ]

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发表于 2008-10-23 19:13:36 |显示全部楼层
mark 晚上回来一并改!

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发表于 2008-10-23 22:41:52 |显示全部楼层
Lots of projects want to get sponsorship from government,like art and athletics.As the money of government is from  taxpayers, the administration should consider their interests seriously/个人觉得这样好点  when dealing the money.From the taxpayers' view,governments should give arts more money than athletics.

First,for most activities of athletics are far from people's daily lives,it is not necessary to donate much money to them.As I know,there are only small number of athletes in these sports,like  running,swimming,throwing balls,etc.These projects-except basketball,football,baseball,and so on-take up a great part of athletics.Those athletes' objects are achieving best score in the competition,even Olympic Games.What they do can not promote health status of individual/common people,which is a large responsibility to the government. In other words, government should take the money from the  taxpayer to  make measures to有点多余 raise health conditions of mass people,not the accomplishment of  a few athletes.

Second,there are other ways from which athletics can get lots of money,like TV,advertisement and rich men. I can always hear that some famous NBA players have tremendous salary.Like these players,some other athletics also have big money contract in football,baseball and so on. And In other fields,like running,athletes also can get a lot of money from advertisement.So it is not necessary for government to give money to them.

When it to comes to art,it can give much fun to individual when enjoying art.There are many forms of art people can enjoy,like popular music,film,modern drama.As government is responsible to increase people's happiness/entertainment facilities,they should support these activities by giving much money.Another aspect is that government should also pay much attention to the teenager's art education.As the mass basic education is profitless/not profit driven,so it also needs the government's help.

Art also gives a way to express the thoughts  of the mass and reflect the dirty aspect/the seamy side  of the society.We can see many excellent art worksrevealing this side,like film,paintings,modern dramas.In Chaplin's film,we can find the American assembly line worker's repetitive and tedious operations,which influences harmfully/exert harmful influence to the everyday life.And it/arts also attract the government and people's attention in the worker's treatment.Another case is stage drama,there are many good satire stories to reflect the bad things of society,like corruptions.Nonetheless, there may be small groups of people lie them/?,so they requires a great support.As It have great values to society,so government should support them too.

In conclusion,art offers the society more value than athletics,and some kinds of art  need to be supported. So government should give more money to arts.

As 和 so 最好不要在同一句子中连用
例子结构没问题
主要是表达有时不到位,这个就需要慢慢积累了,能力有限帮不到你多少啊~

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RE: COMEON作文小组——jimibt 2008 10月22日作业 [修改]

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