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[活动] 『Toefl Dark_Tournament写作组laqfanfan第17次作业』 [复制链接]

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发表于 2009-3-29 23:22:40 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 laqfanfan 于 2009-4-1 23:00 编辑

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The ability to cooperate with others well is more important today than in the past. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

With the improvement of educatian and increasingly competitive job market, we need more time to accomplish a  complex task than has ever been before. Facing with this world where everyone seems to be lack of time, Only to assign a complicated thing to different people who are competent in their own certain research fields, can a job be done more excellantly. So in general, the ability to cooperate with others well is more important today than in the past.

First of all, in the past, it was not surprising that individuals were perhaps capable of doing everything even better than professinal people. But the situation has changed, we live in a world where knowledge is accumulated by multiplying and at the same time becomes more and more specialized. Therefore, to be a professional in a certain field today takes much longer time than has ever been before. No person is able to be professinal in all fields,though they might be experts in one or more fields. As a result, we desire varies of talents.Take a program of real estate in the work force for example, it requires the labor of managers, accountants, marketing managers, evaluate technians and so forth. In brief, it is their collaboration that makes a profit for the company.


In addition, cooperation brings entertainment to us in current society that is filled of more pressure than before. Maybe we can work more efficiently with our co-works especially those who has the sense of humor. At least they could creat an easy atmosphere in a stressful environment. Anyway, we can have more energy to devote ourselves to the works when we collaborate with people we like.

For the reasons presented above, I approve the statement that the ability to cooperate with others well is more important today than in the past. Actually, the ability of collaboration will become more and more important in the future.


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发表于 2009-4-2 13:49:07 |显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 happylr 于 2009-4-2 13:55 编辑

1# laqfanfan
With the improvement of educatian education and increasingly  increas of competitive job market, we need more time to accomplish a  complex task than has ever been before. Facing with this world where everyone seems to be lack of time, Only to assign a complicated thing to a group of different people who are competent in their own certain research fields, can a job be done more excellantly excellently. So in general, the ability to cooperate with others well is more important today than in the past.

First of all, in the past, it was not surprising that individuals were perhaps capable of doing everything even better than professinal professional people. But the situation has changed, we live in a world where knowledge is accumulated by multiplying multiplies and at the same time becomes more and more specialized. Therefore, to be a professional in a certain field today takes much longer time than has ever been before. No person is able to be professional in all fields,though they might be experts in one or more fields. As a result, we desire varies  varieties of talents.Take a program of real estate in the work force for example, it requires the labor of managers, accountants, marketing managers, evaluate technians evaluators and so forth. In brief, it is their collaboration that makes a profit for the company.

In addition, cooperation brings entertainment to us in current society that is filled of more pressure than before. Maybe we can work more efficiently with our co-works especially those who has the sense of humor. At least they could creat an easy atmosphere in a stressful environment. Anyway, we can have more energy to devote ourselves to the works when we collaborate with people we like.   

For the reasons presented above, I approve the statement that the ability to cooperate with others well is more important today than in the past. Actually, the ability of collaboration will become more and more important in the future.

楼主貌似写得很急,文中有很多单词拼写错误,比如education, excellently,professional.还有一些单词的名词形式不对,如technians/educatian.此外比较结构的比较内容阐述有误如....than has ever been before..

个人觉得楼主的第二个论据比较新颖,向你学习了呵呵.

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发表于 2009-4-2 23:06:43 |显示全部楼层
With the improvement of educatian(education) and increasingly competitive job market, we need more time to accomplish a  complex task than has ever been before. Facing with this world where everyone seems to be lack of time, Only(only) to assign a complicated thing to different people who are competent in their own certain research fields, can a job be done more excellently. So in general, the ability to cooperate with others well is more important today than in the past.
First of all, in the past, it was not surprising that individuals were perhaps capable of doing everything even better than professional people. But the situation has changed, we live in a world where knowledge is accumulated by multiplying and at the same time becomes more and more specialized. Therefore, to be a professional in a certain field today takes much longer time than has ever been before. No person is able to be professional in all fields, though they might be experts in one or more fields. As a result, we desire varies of talents. Take a program of real estate in the work force for example, it requires the labor of managers, accountants, marketing managers, evaluate technians(technicians) and so forth. In brief, it is their collaboration that makes a profit for the company.
In addition, cooperation brings entertainment to us in current society that is filled of more pressure than before. Maybe we can work more efficiently with our co-works especially those who has(have) the sense of humor. At least they could creat(create) an easy atmosphere in a stressful environment. Anyway, we can have more energy to devote ourselves to the works when we collaborate with people we like.
  For the reasons presented above, I approve the statement that the ability to cooperate with others well is more important today than in the past. Actually, the ability of collaboration will become more and more important in the future.
文章整体基本没什么问题,除了一些单词上的拼写错误,呵呵。不过我觉得楼主的两个论点似乎specific程度差异比较大,第一个非常长,第二个则比较短,如果能中和一下不知道是不是能更好些。还是要想楼主借鉴一下了呵呵。

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RE: 『Toefl Dark_Tournament写作组laqfanfan第17次作业』 [修改]

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