12.14独立写作

shiwei83UID: 2680950

Nowadays, some may hold the opinion that handsome and attires are more critical for success than good ideas. But others have a negative attitude. As far as I am concerned, I agree that good ideas may take a more crucial role in success than appearance and beautiful costume. My argument for this point are listed as follows.

First of all, I think that having good ideas could always ensure people to be successful, but good looks and dress could not. For example, Albert Einstein, one of the most greatest scientist in human history, he never mind his appearance but constrate on his research work for his hair always crisp. Bill Gates likes casual wear in general, rarely did he wear designed suits. Jerry Yang,The founder of YAHOO, was fond of to buy cheap T-shirt in shopping mall. All the three man obtained huge success, but plain-looking were the common charter of them.

Furthermore, if some one spend most of his time and energy on how to pickup himself, he could spend less time and energy on studying and working. If Edison use all his time to think how to update his clothes to keep up the fashions, maybe we use candle for illumination now. If Bell take tow hours everyday to consider wear which kind of perfume, maybe we can not use telephone for communication nowadays.

Finally, I must concede that there were some people succeed by their appearance, for example, that mostly actor or actress were as bright as a button. But their achievement not only because their beautiful, but also owe to their diligent, genius and exercise. As numerous people who only eats meal only depending on the cheek were, transitory were their fate.

So as I talked above, we can safely drew conclusion that to a man who want to be successful, good ideas were more important than beautiful profile.

gt_bobUID: 2732773

结构很清晰
不过楼主多关注一下语法以及句子的多变吧