eddie的独立作文 1.20

eddie23508okUID: 2281260

1.20 A company is going to give some money either to support the arts or to protect the environment. Which do you think the company should choose? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Art or environment? Which one should the company financially support? It's a hard nut right in front of the decision of the company. However I've got a clear inclination in my brain. If I were the manager, I would choose to donate the money to the enterprise of environment protection. And here goes my explanation.

Firstly, as we all know, environment problem is one of the most serious problems threatening the existence of both humanbeing and other species on the earth. With the roaring advancement of the civilization, we have burdened too much upon the environment we live on. From the burning of the fossil fuels, which emit huge amount of carbon dioxide and result in the global green house effect, to the horrible speed of deforestation, which leads to the damage of the vegetation, home loss of wild lives and extinction of the species in the forest, many evidences illustrate our damage to the environment. Thus environment protection is invariably the urgentest mission of individuals and organizations.

Secondly many of the art creations originate from the attractive and beautiful natural landscape. Many famous painters got their inspiration from the nature, such as blue sky with snow-white clouds, green mountains with clean streams and colorful flowers with industrious bees. Accordingly, protection of the environment is beneficial to the art creation and intact environment can also provide many fanciful elements for it.

Last but not least why I choose to support environment over the art is that good environment can provide people good mood for their work, study and living. With good mood people can work and study more efficiently, which also benefits the process of the civilization. If we live in the environment with grey sky covered by thick smoke and disgusting smell from trash everywhere on the street, what we feel inside can only be depression and hopelessness, let alone art creation.

To sum up, although support for the art is important for people's inside sensitivity of beauty, environment protection, for my part, should deserve more focus from the society. Therefore I would choose to give money to support the environment enterprise.

shirley072UID: 2712200

Art or environment? Which one should the company financially support? It's a hard nut right in front of the decision (in front of the decision感觉有点奇怪) of the company. However I've got a clear inclination in my brain. If I were the manager, I would choose to donate the money to the enterprise of environment protection. And here goes my explanation.


Firstly, as we all know, environment problem is one of the most serious problems threatening the existence of both humanbeing and other species on the earth. With the roaring advancement of the civilization, we have burdened too much upon (最好换一种表述方式吧，lay the burden on) the environment we live on. From the burning of the fossil fuels, which emit huge amount of carbon dioxide and result in the global green house effect, to the horrible speed (horrible speed,可怕的令人震惊的速度好像并不是速度增长快的意思吧？要不直接用fast-growing speed) of deforestation, which leads to the damage of the vegetation, home loss of wild lives and extinction of the species in the forest, many evidences illustrate our damage to the environment. Thus environment protection is invariably the urgentest (most urgent) mission of individuals and organizations.

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Secondly many of the art creations originate from the attractive and beautiful natural landscape. Many famous painters got their inspiration from the nature, such as blue sky with snow-white clouds, green mountains with clean streams and colorful flowers with industrious bees. Accordingly, protection of the environment is beneficial to the art creation and intact environment can also provide many fanciful elements for it.2 _8 C  z, J% A2 g7 e% z- B# ?
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Last but not least why I choose to support environment over the art is that good environment can provide people good mood for their work, study and living. With good mood people can work and study more efficiently, which also benefits the process of the civilization. If we live in the environment with grey sky covered by thick smoke and disgusting smell from trash everywhere on the street, what we feel inside can only be depression and hopelessness, let alone art creation.


To sum up, although support for the art is important for people's inside sensitivity of beauty, environment protection, for my part, should deserve more focus from the society (我觉得这句话可能有点歧义，比如我直接读下来的第一感觉就是although art is important for sensitivity and environment protection, 然后才是一个转折，should前面就感觉没有主语一样). Therefore I would choose to give money to support the environment enterprise.

楼主什么时候考啊？我觉得楼主写得已经很不错了啊
我也很想学习写三个观点，但是我基本上最多只能想起两个，所以就只有不停的扩展，导致容易写出很多不必要的话（细节），如果一定要不时围绕提出的论点写，我写几句就不知道该怎么写了，苦恼奥

woodchucktjuUID: 2491519

Art or environment, which one （删one） should be supported by the company ? It's a hard nut right in front of the decision of the company. However， I've got a clear inclination in my brain. If I were the manager, I would choose to donate the money to the enterprise of environment protection. And here goes my explanation.（and这种连词不能引导一句话，你这么写的直接后果就是这句话没有主句了。）

Firstly, as we all know（老美忌讳说大家都知道这种绝对化的东西）, environment problem is one of the most serious problems threatening the existence of both humanbeing and other species on the earth(Earth,专有名词，世界上只有一个中国，也只有一个地球). With the roaring advancement of the civilization, we have burdened too much upon (别扭。。laid too much burden, or add too much weight on ...) the environment we live on. From the burning of the fossil fuels, which emit huge amount of carbon dioxide and result in the global green house effect, to the horrible speed of deforestation, which leads to the damage of the vegetation, home loss of wild lives and extinction of the species in the forest, many evidences illustrate our damage to the environment.(从句太多，头重脚轻） Thus environment protection is invariably（inevitably?) the urgentest mission of individuals and organizations.5 s. U+ q9 p  R" ]* J4 ~

Secondly many of the art creations originate from the attractive and beautiful natural landscape. Many famous painters got their inspiration from the nature, such as blue sky with snow-white clouds, green mountains with clean streams and colorful flowers with industrious bees. Accordingly, protection of the environment is beneficial to the art creation and intact environment can also provide many fanciful elements for it.% b, c6 L: v; v; m
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Last but not least why I choose to support environment over the art is that good environment can provide people good mood for their work, study and living. With good mood (换个说法，比如well-emotioned people什么的，两个mood太近了，重复之感）people can work and study more efficiently, which also benefits the process of the civilization. If we live in the environment with grey sky covered by thick smoke and disgusting smell from trash everywhere on the street, what we feel inside can only be depression and hopelessness, let alone art creation.

To sum up, although support for the art is important for people's inside sensitivity of beauty, environment protection, for my part, should deserve more focus from the society. Therefore I would choose to give money to support the environment enterprise.


整体感觉，后两个观点太单薄，不如详写其中一个，这么写的感觉是头重脚轻， 后两个好像是在凑字数。


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