ISSUE48

错失湛蓝UID: 2585937

48 "The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten."




Nowadays, it seems increasingly generalized that the celebrities and medias attribute the achievements of significant events and trends to famous people,while the influences carried by the folk or some groups of people are ignored.I agree with the author affirmatively on the viewpoint of the crucial historical facts and trends are not decided by the showed up of the individual ,but propelled by the endeavors made by our people.

The first reason for my support can be explained as the great peoples ,coming into being as the members of our community,are deeply influenced by the civilized society.Not only his characters or aptitudes were cultivated in the environment,but aslo his achievement may be a product of collaborating with the majority of the people.There is a case in point, Indira Gandhi was the great female prime minister in India history.However, it is undeniale that her contributes to the development in industry and society during her regime bear much relation to the surroundings that she lived. Since she grew in an intense political atmosphere family, she was more sensitive to politics and to sociology than contemperaries,she was also more effectively instructed by her elder relatives,such as her father.To some extent, these characters are the fundamental quality that a country leader should have.



The second reason that could be presented as the main power
of a innovation always originate from the folk,rather than the leaders their own.The common sence illustrate that the dominant is the folk in history, no matter when and where.It is the cumulation of
people’s experiences that draw the blueprint for the futher; it is the exploitees’ resistence to the aristocrats that pioneered the progress of the society;it is the people’s industry and fights for the triumph that help ahieve successes.On the contrary, without the help of the public, the campaigns or the innovations just are several plans or illusions staying at the minds.The significance of the masses of pubulic determined the traits of development.


The last,but not the least could be cited as”to err is human”,the most outstanding world leader could commit error,even incorrect guide plan,which is in need of the proposition of others,.

Admittedly the extremenly importantce of crucial people on key issue is should not be denied for sometimed it helps creat a brandnew era in history.However it is unconvincing that the refenrence books instructs that the success achieve absolutely by a part of people.

To sum we could make a conclusion that the significant events and trend has relation to the eadeavors made by the people on one hand ,on the other hand the conspicuous effect of the elite brought about is should not be suspected.Only combied with each other,can our burgeon of scociety be realized

zachary19891018UID: 2765757

48 "The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten."




Nowadays, it seems increasingly generalized that the celebrities and medias attribute the achievements of significant events and trends to famous people,while the influences carried by the folk or some groups of people are ignored.I agree with the author affirmatively on the viewpoint of the crucial historical facts and trends are not decided by the showed up of the individual ,but propelled by the endeavors made by our people.

The first reason for my support can be explained as the great peoples ,coming into being as the members of our community,are deeply influenced by the civilized society.Not only his characters or aptitudes were cultivated in the environment,but aslo his achievement may be a product of collaborating with the majority of the people.There is a case in point, Indira Gandhi was the great female prime minister in India history.However, it is undeniale that her contributes(contributions?) to the development in industry and society during her regime bear much relation to the surroundings that she lived. Since she grew(grew up) in an intense political atmosphere family(family和atmosphere都是名词
要去掉一个吧), she was more sensitive to politics and to sociology than contemperaries（这个比较没有意思吧
同代人比gandhi在sociology方面更加sensitive，一个人和一代人比这个应该是不可以的）,she was also more effectively instructed by her elder relatives,such as her father.To some extent, these characters are the fundamental quality that a country leader should have.



The second reason that could be presented as the main power
of a innovation always originate from the folk,rather than the leaders their own.The common sence illustrate that the dominant （dominant是形容词，
这里你需要的是一个名词）is the folk in history, no matter when and where.It is the cumulation of
people’s experiences that draw the blueprint for the futher; it is the exploitees’ resistence to the aristocrats that pioneered the progress of the society;it is the people’s industry and fights for the triumph that help ahieve successes.On the contrary, without the help of the public, the campaigns or the innovations just are several plans or illusions staying at the minds（这句话语法有问题啊
作者再研究一下）.The significance of the masses of pubulic determined the traits of development.


The last,but not the least could be cited as”to err is human”,the most outstanding world leader could commit error,even incorrect guide plan,which is in need of the proposition of others,.

Admittedly the extremenly importantce of crucial people on key issue is should not be denied for sometimed it helps creat a brandnew era in history.However it is unconvincing that the refenrence books instructs that the success achieve absolutely by a part of people.（a part of people啥意思？）

To sum we could make a conclusion that the significant events and trend has relation to the eadeavors made by the people on one hand ,(这句话我语法看不懂，你再看看哈)on the other hand the conspicuous effect of the elite brought about is should not be suspected.Only combied with each othe（by combing each other）r,can our burgeon(burgeon 作为名词时是嫩芽
蓓蕾的意思，用在这里不恰当) of scociety be realized


评价：
1 .作者的词汇量很大，但是有些词汇的用法不是很准确。
2. 第一遍读的时候感觉比北美范文更拗口，
我想这是因为作者语法上也有问题吧。还有字数明显不够
3．标点符号后面要空一格，这要注意
4. 作者全文的逻辑是有问题的，你第一段说是同意speaker，这让人觉得这是一篇一边倒的赞同的文章，却又在最后第二段出现了admittedly让步承认a few individuals 的作用，这不是自相矛盾吗？如果出现admittedly，你第一段必须加上fundamentally agree，而且好的结构最好是让步放在第二段，让步完以后再开始说大众的影响，
我觉得这样比教好，因为大众的影响是重点，所以最好放在后面。 还有你第三个理由过于空泛



个人意见
不足之处请指正
可以再后面跟帖