1.24独立写作作业

w龙ol杨fUID: 2779438

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Visiting museums is the best way to learn a country.

With the increasing number of international cooperation, people from the whole world tend to have an access to the knowledge of other countries. But what is the best way to learn a country? As far as I'm concerned, visiting museums is an ideal means. I have several reasons to name.

Arterially, museums can show us what the people of that place value culturally. For instance, a trip to the New York Metropolitan Museum of Art would make the visitors aware of that Americans are interested in art from all over the world. Similarly, in San Francisco there is a large museum devoted solely of Asian Art, therefore, we can figure out that people from San Francisco have affection towards Asian culture.

In addition, museums can help us to understand some hidden ideas and impulses of that society. The arts displayed in museums such as paintings tend to represent people's emotional responses to life including hope, happiness, sorrow and so forth. For example, the picture Sunflower painted by Vincent Van Gogh reveals his fanaticism about life and this picture implies the main ideology at that time.

Currently, thank to the museums' some special performances, we can keep pace with the latest fashions of that country. Many museums in the United States hold special nights once a week, young people there can drink and socialize, from this activity, we will easy to know about the modern America.

Meanwhile, according to the scale of the museum we can also get some information about the economic condition and economic development of that country. Take China for example, with the high speed of economic development, almost any aspect of the quality of people’s life has been improved. As a result of the economic development, China has the ability to build a museum of large scale.

hycqyUID: 2819662

谁来帮着改一下?

theflyfishUID: 2101420

With the increasing number of international cooperation, peoplefrom the whole world tend to have an access to the knowledge of othercountries. But what is the best way to learn a country? As far as I'mconcerned, visiting museums is an ideal means. I have several reasons to name.


Arterially, museums can show us what the people of that placevalue culturally. For instance, a trip to the New York Metropolitan Museum ofArt would make the visitors aware of that Americans are interested in art fromall over the world. Similarly, in San Francisco there is a large museum devotedsolely of Asian Art, therefore, we can figure out that people from SanFrancisco have affection towards Asian culture(建议不要用6分作文上的例子.实在要用的话,也要做一下修改,如北京博物馆说明中国人喜欢世界各地的艺术,而四川博物馆说明四川人更倾向于本地艺术…)

In addition, museums can help us tounderstand some hidden ideas and impulses of that society.
(这个观点来自GRE ISSUE试题?这个分论点过于抽象，根本无法用一段文字说明白。hiddenideas and impulses of that society指的是什么，museum如何帮助我们理解hidden ideas andimpulses,都没有说清楚。) The arts displayed in museums， such as paintings， tend to represent people's emotionalresponses to life including hope, happiness, sorrow and so forth. For example, the picture Sunflowerpainted by Vincent Van Gogh reveals his fanaticism about life and this pictureimplies the main ideology at that time. (梵高的作品implies the main ideology at that time？分论点提到的是hidden ideas and impulses,与这里说的main ideology at that time，两者是矛盾的吧) Currently, thank to the museums' some specialperformances（thanks to some special performances of the museums）, we can keep pace with the latestfashions of that country.(下面的例子证明不了这个观点。首先，即使有很多美国在museum办party，但除了美国之外的其他国家呢？其次，参加年轻人的party once a week,就能keep pace with the latest fashions?) Many museums in the United States holdspecial nights once a week, young people there can drink and socialize, fromthis activity, we will
（are/will be）easy to know about the modern America(用自己的例子)
Meanwhile,according to the scale of the museum we can also get some information about theeconomic condition and economic development of that country. Take China for （an）
example. With the high speed of economicdevelopment, almost any(every) aspect of the quality
(the quality of 可以删掉) of people’s life has been improved. Asa result of the economic development, China has the ability to build a museumof large scale.
（博物馆大就说明经济发展好？美国和韩国有很多只有特定某一类展品的专门博物馆，它们的规模都非常小；反面，印度、埃及这些地方都有大型博物馆，因为展品很多）

楼主最好用自己的观点，自己的语言来写，否则批改也没有意义。

w龙ol杨fUID: 2779438

感谢高人指点，可否麻烦您赐教举例方面的方法？例子如何积累，这个的确是一件我头疼的事情 3# theflyfish

WoYaoChiJiTuiUID: 2850295

1.24独立已改
revised by WoYaoChiJiTui.doc (28 KB, 下载次数: 7)

2011-1-25 20:07:01 上传

下载次数: 7

蝶飞依依UID: 2905269

' {; E% X2 ~  K
With the increasing number of international cooperation, people from the whole world tend to have an access to the knowledge of other(different/foreign) countries. But what is the best way to learn a country? As far as I'm concerned, visiting museums is an ideal means. I have several reasons to name.

Arterially, museums can show us what the people of that place value culturally(show us what values the people of that place have culturally). For instance, a trip to the New York Metropolitan Museum of Art would make the visitors aware of that(aware that, aware of 和aware that 不能混用) Americans are interested in art from all over the world. Similarly, in San Francisco there is a large museum devoted solely of Asian Art, therefore, we can figure out that people from San Francisco have affection towards Asian culture.1

In addition, museums can help us to understand some hidden ideas and impulses of that society. The arts displayed in museums such as paintings tend to represent people's emotional responses to life including hope, happiness, sorrow and so forth. For example, the picture Sunflower painted by Vincent Van Gogh reveals his fanaticism about life and this picture implies the main ideology at that time./ z'(这个例子之后应该稍有推论和总结，为什么这个例子在这里证明了museums can help us to understand some hidden ideas and impulses of that society）

Currently, thanks to the museums' some special performances, we can keep pace with the latest fashions of that country. Many museums in the United States hold special nights once a week, young people there can drink and socialize, from this activity（这个插入语用的感觉不是很合适，直接断句另起一句更清楚明了）, we will easy to know about the modern America.- k2 p, S2 A+

R
! E& Y# Q) D" _
Meanwhile, according to the scale of the museum we can also get some information about the economic condition and economic development of that country. Take China for example, with the high speed of economic development, almost any aspect of the quality of people’s life has been improved. As a result of the economic development, China has the ability to build a museum of large scale.

（文章最后有结尾才完整）
很喜欢楼主文章中的例子，如果再深入的推理论证一下与主题的关系就更有逻辑性了，学习了~~

theflyfishUID: 2101420

4# w龙ol杨f

积累例子最好的方法是首先看一遍题库（TWE和ibt机经），然后多看书，报纸，期刊，博客，等等。（有时间看时代，经济学人。没时间看看南方周末，人物周刊，都挺不错的）找到满意的例子记录下来。最好专门建一个文件夹专门收集例子，再按类别积累。
简单的方法也有。
一个是改写。看别人的例子，到网上查查背景，再用自己的话写出来。（一定不要抄。不管能不能被发现都不要吵。这是个态度问题。）
另一个是结合自己经历编例子。（这个比较推荐，也是很多人使用的方法）主语可以是自己、同学、朋友、亲戚等等，无所谓。关键在于例子要具体，并且要能完美证明你的观点。同时要在例子里添加一些细节描述，使其更可信，也更有说服力。
现在就想到这些。我也刚开始准备，很多地方不明白。楼主最好多看看别人的帖子。

w龙ol杨fUID: 2779438

感谢楼上的大侠们的帮助~

w龙ol杨fUID: 2779438

谢谢您的建议~学习啦~ 6# 蝶飞依依