Argument117 交作业咯,大家来拍必回拍！

chris_zhUID: 2101887

The manager supposes that the office-supply department will be the most profitable component in Valu-Mart because of the trend that displayed in a survey. In fact, without concerning many other factors which will influence the sale, the recommendation he offered seems somewhat groundless.
In that survey mentioned, we may wonder, is it conducted randomly? How large is the sample size? Do the respondents cover all kinds of jobs? Who or what organization conduct the survey? What about his/its credibility? The manager fails to tell us all these important factors to judge the survey. There can be possibility that all the respondents involved in the survey are all teachers, and it is now mid-June, the semester exams are approaching, so the teachers have to take more work home. Yet, can it represent all the people in other jobs? Probably not. Thus, the trend that got from the survey may be problematic.
Even if there is a trend to take more work home, we can not find any causal relationship between this trend and the increased office-supply demand.  Since the manager does not tell us what does the "more work" exactly stand for? Is it double, three times or just a little bit more? If every one just needs to do five minutes more work at home a day, they will probably not to buy more office supplies. By the same token, what type of work will they do at home? Is it simply writing, typing, or just need to think about some new ideas? It is not possible that for some managers, what the "work" they bring to home is to consider the progress that gained and the problems remained in his/her company today, and to find some solutions, hoping to get new progresses the next day. Hence, under this circumstance, they hardly need any office-supplies at all. If so, will they go to buy any copy machines or paper shredders? I doubt.

Also, even if the demand for office-supplies does increase dramatically due to the new trend, it is not necessarily follows that the office-supply departments will become the most profitable component in Valu-Mart, as profit is decided by the income and expenditure of a company. If the stored office supply is more than the increased demand, the income can not balance the expenditure, then the department can not get ideal profit neither. And if payout can not be taken back, the currency circulation will be impeded; the company can not invest in some other products. That will lead to a vicious circle, the office -supply department can hardly be the most profitable component in Valu-Mart.
There are still many things that the manager of Valu-Mart should take into account before he provides this recommendation. Otherwise, the recommendation is unwarranted as it stands.

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-7-29 at 00:18 ]

ahqiuUID: 207682

明天帮你看，这是我的issue,有空指点一下
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... ;highlight=%2Bahqiu

ahqiuUID: 207682

交作业咯，Argument117,大家来拍必回拍！

The manager supposes that the office-supply department will be the most profitable component in Valu-Mart because of the trend that displayed in a survey. In fact, without concerning many other factors which will influence the sale, the recommendation he offered seems somewhat groundless.

In that survey mentioned, we may wonder, is it conducted randomly? How large is the sample size? Do the respondents cover all kinds of jobs? Who or what organization conduct the survey? What about his/its credibility?（这句话放在开头去吧，前面的东西都是令人质疑的） The manager fails to tell us all these important factors to judge the survey. There can be possibility that all the respondents involved in the survey are all teachers, and it is now mid-June, the semester exams are approaching, so the teachers have to take more work home. （跟我想的一样，巧）Yet, can it represent all the people in other jobs? Probably not. Thus, the trend that got from the survey may be problematic.（剃了那么多问题却只分析了一个，这样说理就不全面了，要么可以不用问那么多，要么就多分析几个，比如How large is the sample size?）
Even if there is a trend to take more work home, we can not find any causal relationship between this trend and the increased office-supply demand.  Since the manager does not tell us what does the "more work" exactly stand for? Is it double, three times or just a little bit more? If every one just needs to do five minutes more work at home a day, they will probably not to buy more office supplies. By the same token, （同样的原因？不是吧） what type of work will they do at home? Is it simply writing, typing, or just need to think about some new ideas? It is not possible that for some managers, what the "work" they bring to home is to consider the progress that gained and the problems remained in his/her company today, and to find some solutions, hoping to get new progresses the next day. （好长一句，语法不错）Hence, under this circumstance, they hardly need any office-supplies at all. If so, will they go to buy any copy machines or paper shredders? I doubt.（长短句结合得挺好）

Also, even if the demand for office-supplies does increase dramatically due to the new trend, it is not necessarily follows that the office-supply departments will become the most profitable component in Valu-Mart, as profit is decided by the income and expenditure of a company. If the stored office supply is more than the increased demand, （and）the income can not balance the expenditure, then the department can not get ideal profit neither. And if payout can not be taken back, the currency circulation will be impeded; the company can not invest in some other products. That will lead to a vicious circle, the office -supply department can hardly be the most profitable component in Valu-Mart.
There are still many things(具体化一点，这样的many没有说服力) that the manager of Valu-Mart should take into account before he provides this recommendation. Otherwise, the recommendation is unwarranted as it stands.
这个结尾太短了， 我个人觉得具体讲一下还缺什么比较好

chris_zhUID: 2101887

多谢啊，我再去学习学习你的这篇arg,还有那个issue167