issue157

abigredUID: 154473

Issue157  第8篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！
------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：40分3秒     613 words
-----题目------
There is no such thing as purely objective observation. All observation is subjective; it is always guided by the observer's expectations or desires.

提纲:
B1B2.主观的：受到想象力.人生态度等主观因素的影响
B3：科学的观察要求是客观的

------正文------
Once we look into the sky, some people might  marvel at the beauty of the stars, while some people might feel puzzled because of its unknowns. Well, it is quite common that we have different feelings towards the same object. And I fundamentally agree with the speaker on that lots of the observations are subjective, while under some circumstances, mainly in scientific field, are objective.

Why the observation is subjective most of the time? I take our imagination, ways of thinking, background and emotion as the main reason for this answer. As we all know, human beings are highly socialized creatures, and our feelings and many other subjective things influence the way we look at the world. Little children of the kindergarten, for instance, might aptly illustrate how imagination plays a significant role in observation. When asked what the half divided apple looks like, many children  would say it's half round, and of course, it is right. However, what is more interesting is that a child said the centre of the divided apple looked like a star. How imaginary the answer is! And sure enough, this is a more attracting answer. Imagination, especially for those little kids, is quite important when they observe the same objects.

Further more,  persons of different attitude towards life also form quite distinguished views on the same objective. To take a test once carried out in the psychology for example. When a circle is draw with the white chalk on a blackboard and people are asked what about their observation about the circle. Not surprisingly, different answers come up. People who are optimistic keep their eyes on the white circle, and think it as a new break through the darkness. On the contrary, as pessimistic people, they might complain that the circle circumscribes the free will of people, or more directly, like in a prison. I think both the answers are right, while the former concentrate on the lightness, the latter do the otherwise.  That is the same of people in the society, if we deep down the meaning under the test. When we observe the same world, we not merely see the things by our eyes, but also think about them or even meditate. The process of observing the world is diverse, added into our imagination, attitude and emotional feelings.

However, when the statement that the observation is subjective finds its truth in our daily life, we should be aware not to take this too far. Under some circumstance, we could not change the observation in our desire or expectation. Take the science for example. We can easily imagine how awful it will be if the observation in science is totally subjective-----Sun revolves the Earth, God is in charge of the selection of human and so on. No accurate laws of nature will exist any more! Luckily, this would be reality in today's society. Mainly because our excellent scientists always keep in mind that the observation about the facts and objects should be objective, and should not be swayed by their own desire or expectation. History also warns us the danger of subjective observation in science, like the Sweden doctor was too eager to win the Nobel Prize, and made up the story that he had discovered the "cancer insect" which was totally unreasonable.

To sum up, I think we human beings are really lucky because the subjective observation brings different colors to our life, rendering it beautiful and attracting. And at the same time, the objective observation in some circumstances helps us rightly explain our world, which gives rise to lots of inventions and theory. To combine those two, we will have better understanding about our surroundings.

htpengUID: 2115584

除了一些比较细微的语法错误，挑不出什么毛病。而且非常喜欢这种开头和结尾方式。但个人认为正文中语气应该尽量客观，不要用感叹号什么的。

B2似乎和B1没有分开的必要，还有题目中强调了expectation 和desire，我觉得这两点可以在深入讨论下，更切题。

Anyway,至少是篇5分范文。。。

abigredUID: 154473

:L肆水又来做好人了。。。下次一定要挑错误，不能只说好话了。让偶骄傲:mad::@

udoUID: 2114276

先占个位子

fishtutuUID: 199884

占位的说!

udoUID: 2114276

Once we look into the sky, some people might  marvel at the beauty of the stars, while some people might feel puzzled because of its unknowns. Well, it is quite common that we have different feelings towards the same object. And I fundamentally agree with the speaker on that lots of the observations are subjective, while under some circumstances, mainly in scientific field, are objective while后面可以省略主语observation吗？btw你的开头很新颖，以一个小例子开头赞.

Why the observation is subjective most of the time? I take our imagination, ways of thinking, background and emotion as the main reason复数 for this answer. As we all know, human beings are highly socialized creatures, and our feelings and many other subjective things 此处具体化比较好吧，此外things用得很别扭 influence the way we look at the world. Little children of the kindergarten, for instance, might aptly illustrate how imagination plays a significant role in observation. When asked what the half divided apple looks like, many children  would say it's half round, and of course, it is right. However, what is more interesting is that a child said the centre of the divided apple looked like a star. How imaginary the answer is! And sure enough, this is a more attracting answer. Imagination, especially for those little kids, is quite important when they observe the same objects这句话和你的ts不符，本文不是讨论imagination的重要性 .

Further more,  persons of different attitude towards life also form quite distinguished views on the same objective. To take a test once carried out in the psychology for example. When a circle is draw with the white chalk on a blackboard and people are asked what about their observation about the circle. Not surprisingly, different answers come up. People who are optimistic keep their eyes on the white circle, and think it as a new break through the darkness. On the contrary, as pessimistic people, they might complain that the circle circumscribes the free will of people, or more directly, like in a prison. I think both the answers are right, while the former concentrate on the lightness, the latter do focus on the otherwise.这个例子用得真好！   That is the same of people in the society, if we deep down the meaning under the test. When we observe the same world, we not merely see the things by our eyes, but also think about them or even meditate. The process of observing the world is diverse, added into our imagination, attitude and emotional feelings.

However, when the statement that the observation is subjective finds its truth in our daily life, we should be aware not to take this too far. Under some circumstance, we could not change the observation in our desire or expectation. Take the science for example. We can easily imagine how awful it will be if the observation in science is totally subjective-----Sun revolves the Earth, God is in charge of the selection of human and so on. No accurate laws of nature will exist any more! Luckily, this would be reality in today's society. Mainly because our excellent scientists always keep in mind that the observation about the facts and objects should be objective, and should not be swayed by their own desire or expectation. History also warns us the danger of subjective observation in science, like the Sweden doctor was too eager to win the Nobel Prize, and made up the story that he had discovered the "cancer insect" which was totally unreasonable. 这是个急功近利的例子吧，用在这里似乎不合适，因为cancer insect不一定是观察产物啊，可能是杜撰的。

To sum up, I think we human beings are really lucky because the subjective observation brings different colors to our life, rendering it beautiful and attracting. And at the same time, the objective observation in some circumstances helps us rightly explain our world, which gives rise to lots of inventions and theory. To combine those two, we will have better understanding about our surroundings.

AlexandraUID: 185174

我来了

fishtutuUID: 199884

issue157

Issue157  第8篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！
------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：40分3秒     613 words
-----题目------
There is no such thing as purely objective observation. All observation is subjective; it is always guided by the observer's expectations or desires.

提纲:
B1B2.主观的：受到想象力.人生态度等主观因素的影响
B3：科学的观察要求是客观的

------正文------
Once we look into the sky, some people might  marvel at the beauty of the stars, while some people might feel puzzled because of its unknowns. Well, it is quite common that we have different feelings towards the same object. And I fundamentally agree with the speaker on that lots of the observations are subjective, 这里有点小错误while under some circumstances, mainly in scientific field, are objective.
这个开头太帅了！我喜欢！
Why the observation is subjective most of the time? I take our imagination, ways of thinking, background and emotion as the main reason for this answer. As we all know, human beings are highly socialized creatures, and our feelings and many other subjective things influence the way we look at the world. Little children of the kindergarten, for instance, might aptly illustrate how imagination plays a significant role in observation. When asked what the half divided apple looks like, many children  would say it's half round, and of course, it is right. However, what is more interesting is that a child said the centre of the divided apple looked like a star. 例子不充分How imaginary the answer is! And sure enough, this is a more attracting answer这里有点自圆其说的感觉 . Imagination, especially for those little kids, is quite important when they observe the same objects.
You TS is “”Why the observation is subjective most of the time?””. However, there seems no persuasive evidence to show why. Anyway the language is excellent
Further more,  persons of different attitude towards life also form quite distinguished views on the same objective. To take a test once carried out in the psychology for example. When a circle is draw with the white chalk on a blackboard and people are asked what about their observation about the circle. Not surprisingly, different answers come up. People who are optimistic keep their eyes on the white circle, and think it as a new break through the darkness. On the contrary, as pessimistic people, 为什么用AS，好像有错的说they might complain that the circle circumscribes the free will of people, or more directly, like in a prison. example is powerful，赞一个I think both the answers are right, while the former concentrate on the lightness, the latter do the otherwise这句话有问题.  That is the same of people in the society, if we deep down the meaning under the test. When we observe the same world, we not merely see the things by our eyes, but also think about them or even meditate这句话逻辑乖乖的！. The process of observing the world is diverse, added into 你是要说加进了吧，好像部队！ our imagination, attitude and emotional feelings.

However, when the statement that the observation is subjective finds its truth in our daily life, we should be aware not to take this too far. Under some circumstance, we could not change the observation in our desire or expectation. Take the science for example. We can easily imagine how awful it will be if the observation in science is totally subjective-----Sun revolves the Earth, God is in charge of the selection of human and so on. No accurate laws of nature will exist any more! Luckily, this would be reality in today's society. Mainly mainly??有烟瘾，没结果！because our excellent scientists always keep in mind that the observation about the facts and objects should be objective, and should not be swayed by their own desire or expectation. History also warns us the danger of subjective observation in science, like the Sweden doctor was too eager to win the Nobel Prize, and made up the story that he had discovered the "cancer insect" which was totally unreasonable这个例子我喜欢：.

To sum up, I think we human beings are really lucky because the subjective observation brings different colors to our life, rendering it beautiful and attracting. And at the same time, the objective observation in some circumstances helps us rightly explain our world, which gives rise to lots of inventions and theory. To combine those two, we will have better understanding about our surroundings.
开头和结尾都很好！6分的标准！

AlexandraUID: 185174

issue157   (jingyi)

Issue157  第8篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！
------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：40分3秒     613 words
-----题目------
There is no such thing as purely objective observation. All observation is subjective; it is always guided by the observer's expectations or desires.

提纲:
B1B2.主观的：受到想象力.人生态度等主观因素的影响
B3：科学的观察要求是客观的
3
------正文------
Once we look into the sky, some people might  marvel at the beauty of the stars, while some people might feel puzzled because of its unknowns. Well, [尽量用正式文体写] it is quite common that we have different feelings towards the same object. And I fundamentally agree with the speaker on that lots of the observations are subjective, while  under some circumstances, mainly in scientific field, are objective.

Why the observation is subjective most of the time? [ 注意特殊疑问句。有错误，是吗？] I take our imagination, ways of thinking, background and emotion as the main reason for this answer. As we all know, human beings are highly socialized creatures, and our feelings and many other subjective things influence the way we look at the world. Little children of the kindergarten, for instance, might aptly illustrate how imagination plays a significant role in observation. When asked what the half divided apple looks like, many children  would say it's [加个量词 会不会好些]half round, and of course, it is right. However, what is more interesting is that a child said the centre of the divided apple looked like a star. How imaginary the answer is! And sure enough, this is a more attracting answer. Imagination, especially for those little kids, is quite important when they observe the same objects. [我发现 你的文章， 很多句子 很口语化。]

Further more,  persons of different attitude [可以加复数吗？] towards life also form quite distinguished views on the same objective. To take a test once carried out in the psychology for example. When a circle is draw with the white chalk on a blackboard and people are asked what about their observation about the circle. Not surprisingly, different answers come up. People who are optimistic keep their eyes on the white circle, and [and？？？？]think it as a new break through the darkness. On the contrary, as [我认为这里用as， 不对。 你查查。你是不是想说 对于那些悲观的人， 他们怎样怎样。。。——是吗？ ] pessimistic people, they might complain that the circle circumscribes the free will of people, or more directly, like in a prison.[感觉你在讲 不同人的看法时， 从我的角度来看， 好象 是一群一群人的意思。 是不是应该表达为， 以某种心态为出发点的人中， 有一些人会这样看或那样看？——你所讲的只是个别的看法而已啊。] I think both the answers are right, while the former[可以用这个词吗？我不知道] concentrate on the lightness, the latter do the otherwise.[请恕我迟钝， 我还是觉得这句话，不应该这样表达？？ 可以麻烦你跟我 说说吗？？ 谢谢！]  That is the same of people in the society, if we [deep down ][不对吧/？？/  是吗？]the meaning under the test. When we observe the same world, we not merely see the things by our eyes,[我还是很怀疑our eyes ，你用了by。 我回去 再查查吧  ] but also think about them or even meditate. The process of observing the world is diverse, added into our imagination, attitude and emotional feelings. [例子不错]

However, when the statement that the observation is subjective finds its truth in our daily life, we should be aware not to take this too far.[感觉有问题。  另外， 我个人的一点建议：：  试试 用thorough 或positive  来组织句子。 ] Under some circumstance, we could not change the observation in our desire or expectation. Take the science for example. We can easily imagine how awful it will be if the observation in science is totally subjective-----Sun revolves the Earth, God is in charge of the selection of human and so on. No accurate laws of nature will exist any more! Luckily, this would be reality in today's society. Mainly because our excellent scientists always keep in mind that the observation about the facts and objects should be objective, and should not be swayed by their own desire or expectation. History also warns us the danger of subjective observation in science, like the Sweden doctor was too eager to win the Nobel Prize, and made up the story that he had discovered the "cancer insect" which was totally unreasonable.

To sum up, I think we[有问题] human beings  are really lucky because the subjective observation brings different colors to our life, rendering it beautiful and attracting.[rendering it beautiful and attracting， 你放这里， 会不会 让人疑惑？ 尽管我知道你是想形容our life。但是rendering的 形式，还有 it所代表的东西。我感觉 有问题。 你再编排一下] And at the same time, the objective observation in some circumstances helps us rightly explain our world, which gives rise to lots of inventions and theory. To combine those two, we will have better understanding about our surroundings.  

哈哈， 小牛，  我希望下次能看到像 上次 大家给你的评价是5分以上的那样的文章，  继续加油哦！！ 等你下一篇 精彩的文章。

                    以上讨论 仅是 个人愚见，  不对的地方  请指正——呵呵 不然，我可白改了。

abigredUID: 154473

嗯，谢谢乌龟，说到口语化的问题，是因为看了官方的范文，觉得并不是我们想象中那么的死板，有很多的地方都可能比较自由的，例如格式、语言。所以我觉得可以适当地在句子可以表达一种自我的态度，不知道理解得对不对。。。

很多句子有语法错误，呵呵，谢谢你指出：）

AlexandraUID: 185174

恩 我最近看了 北美. 也发现了这个问题
好象 也没有必要 太 严肃啊   :)