issue4 寄托４人组作业 ８月１１日

meautoUID: 2116250

Issue4 No field of study can advance significantly unless outsiders bring their knowledge and experience to that field of study.
Outsider: people who does not belong to a particular group
Study: such application to a particular field or to a specific subject
同意：历史学（社会学，考古学。。。。）
不同意 艺术领域的创新与突破往往来自艺术家个人
I agree with the assertion that important advances in most fields of study require expertise from various fields. However, the speaker unnecessarily extends this broad assertion to embrace all the fields of study. In my point of view, whether knowledge and experience from outsiders play a decisive role for progress in a field of study depends on the nature of the study.

I concede that the speaker’s assertion is right in the realm of history. Generally speaking, historians aspire to the access of past events and intelligible account for them. However, both steps require the auxiliary from other fields of study. By unearthing the research materials, such as documents and records, archeologists provide historians the base for their study. If the documents, for example, are written in other language foreign to a professional historian, he or she would probably turn to linguists for help. What is more, as numerous events are the collective and cumulative products of specific social environment and economic atmosphere, always do historians look to sociologists and economists for comprehensive understanding of the past. Take historical study of Cultural Revolution as an illustration. To offer an intelligible and relatively object interpretation of this sweeping political movement in China, historian must first focus their study on Great Leap Forward, whose failure directly led to Cultural Revolution. Since Great Leap Forward is in reality a national economic program, economy knowledge is hence needed here for historians to depict and interpret Cultural Revolution with insightful meanings.

When it comes to the realm of art, knowledge and experience from outsiders carry much less weight for advances in art. Artistic work in various forms, such as painting, sculpture, and crafts, is remarkably distinguished for human creativity and originality, and it seldom relates itself with    expertise from disciplines other than art. In another word, any significant progress in the world of art comes form artists’ continuing exploring for or sporadically inspiration of new ideas. Picasso, for example, is generally considered one of the most important painters in the world. He wins his worldwide reputation for his pioneering the modern art movement, cubism. Great influenced by Cezanne, another preeminent painter, Picasso displayed extraordinary talent and creativity to pilot cubistic art campaign, independent of experience pertaining to other field. Another example is Jane Austen, Victorian writer known for her Pride and Prejudice, spending most of her lifetime home, as most contemporaneous women did. What inspired her to write Pride and Prejudice, as well as Emma, was her years-long observation of daily family life. Jane embedded her everyday experience into words, and again, like Picasso, she achieved her success in literature for personal creativity, having nothing to do with outsiders.

In conclusion, it is too broad an assertion that only when the knowledge and experience from outsiders are introduced can progress be made in a particular field of study. While this may be true in history study, it is ill logical for art, as illustrated by the cases of Picasso, the Spanish painter, and British writer, Jane Austen.

tangjihedeUID: 2107695

taken!

tangjihedeUID: 2107695

Issue4 No field of study can advance significantly unless outsiders bring their knowledge and experience to that field of study.
Outsider: people who does not belong to a particular group
Study: such application to a particular field or to a specific subject
同意：历史学（社会学，考古学。。。。）
不同意 艺术领域的创新与突破往往来自艺术家个人
I agree with the assertion that important advances in most fields of study require expertise from various fields. However, the speaker unnecessarily extends this broad assertion to embrace all the fields of study. In my point of view, whether knowledge and experience from outsiders play a decisive role for progress in a field of study depends on the nature of the study.[干净利落的开头。好！]

[建议开头还是加个语气状语给读者结构上的暗示；而且如果不加的话，由于上一段也是以I。。开头的，显得重复]I concede that the speaker’s assertion is right in the realm of history. [history only??你可以说在某些领域是对的，比如历史。否则太极端了：就历史是这样的？]Generally speaking, historians aspire to the access of past events and intelligible account [s?]for them. However, both steps require the auxiliary[可以作名词么？我不确定。请教一下] from other fields of study. [ 很好的句式，很清晰的结构]By unearthing the research materials, such as documents and records, archeologists provide historians [the base最好用the adj n，三个词读的更顺口。] for their study. If the documents, for example, are[were?] written in other language foreign[ 今天刚才托福语法中学了这种形容词短语后置的结构。赞!] to a professional historian, he or she would probably turn to linguists for help. What is more, [这段的连接词都不错！]as numerous events are the [delete the]collective and cumulative products of specific social environment and economic [atmosphere word choice. Condition?], always do[这个倒装不自然。Always也有些过，因为有些历史学家也掌握了一定的经济学知识。有些干脆是经济史家] historians look to sociologists and economists for comprehensive understanding of the past. Take historical study of Cultural Revolution as an illustration. To offer an intelligible and relatively object[objective] interpretation of this sweeping political movement in China, historian must first focus their study on Great Leap Forward[例子中加着太多的背景和术语了。考官回一头雾水问这又是什么运动。直接用泛化的“之前的历次政治运动”就可以了。或者在后面直接用定语从句再界定一下], whose failure directly led to Cultural Revolution. Since Great Leap Forward is in reality a national economic program, economy[economics ] knowledge is hence needed here for historians to depict and interpret Cultural Revolution with insightful meanings[insightful opinions?].[结构很清晰，句与句直接的衔接很棒！就是再采用从一般到个别的分析就更好了。]

When it comes to the realm of art,[还是用泛化的表述：“至于其他一些领域。。（这里最好加一个深层次的解释是那些特性决定了这些领域不同于历史学那样的领域），比如艺术”] knowledge and experience from outsiders carry much less weight for advances in art. Artistic work in various forms, such as painting, sculpture, and crafts, is remarkably distinguished for[for??] human creativity and originality, and it seldom relates itself with  expertise from disciplines other than art[and it seldom relates itself with expertise from other disciplines]. In another word, any significant progress in the world[field or realm] of art comes form artists’ continuing exploring for or sporadically inspiration of new ideas. Picasso, for example, is generally considered one of the most important painters in the world. He wins his worldwide reputation for his pioneering[???搭配似乎不当] the modern art movement, cubism. Great influenced by Cezanne, another preeminent painter, Picasso displayed extraordinary talent and creativity to pilot cubistic art campaign, 【independent of experience pertaining to other field[fields]】. Another example is Jane Austen, [a] Victorian writer known for her Pride and Prejudice, spending most of her lifetime home, as most contemporaneous women did. What inspired her to write Pride and Prejudice, as well as Emma, was her years-long observation of daily family life. Jane embedded her everyday experience into words, [;]and again, like Picasso, she achieved her success in literature for personal creativity, [while has]having nothing to do with outsiders. [最后再加一句收尾]

In conclusion, it is too broad an assertion that only when the knowledge and experience from outsiders are introduced can progress be made in a[every] particular field of study. While this may be true in history study, it is ill logical for art, as illustrated by the cases of Picasso, the Spanish painter, and British writer, Jane Austen.[西班牙和不列颠有点儿累赘。]

[全文结构清晰，语言干净，段内的展开层次也非常清楚。不错！但有几点值得注意：
1．        你是用了两个个案来分析，最好还是用笼统的一些学科。。另一些学科。。， 并从深层次上论证这两类的为什么会有不同，这样可以使文章的主题更深化和更具说服力。否则让人还是不明白为什么历史就得让外人进来，而艺术就不行。
2．        至于你举的艺术的例子，一开始看你的提纲的时候感觉似乎不恰当，因为study给人的感觉是在说某一门学术研究，放在艺术方面就不是艺术家而艺术史家的事儿，即学院里研究奥斯汀和毕加索的那些人。对于他们来说，借鉴心理学、历史等等是很有必要的。而很难说毕加索从事的是艺术“研究”。说实在的，如果我写，我会认同外行给研究带来的新鲜空气，而不同意只有外行进入才可能有重大突破这种极端观点。这一点可以再讨论。]

哥哥家有二师兄UID: 2124390

那段关于历史的论证很经典

bridgewalkerUID: 208595

类似老外280的思路。

meautoUID: 2116250

Originally posted by bridgewalker at 2005-8-11 22:32
类似老外280的思路。

就是这样滴!
我还是从模仿起家吧.

meautoUID: 2116250

1 intelligible account可以理解的解释
2 auxiliary可以作名词用
3 pioneering modern art movement是我在encarta上看的原句
4  你在结尾和我说的问题我必须承认@_@||
   写完了才发现这个问题.
就如我在mv上查的study的解释
题目实际上是强调研究领域的
就艺术家本身来谈不合适

其次.就象历史学家本身也可能是经济学家
艺术研究人员也可能同时是别的方面的专家.
这不成了通才专才的问题了?
那就没有outsider一说了.


.....................ft.........................................
每个题目都这么复杂
恩恩.

tangjihedeUID: 2107695

pioneering"in" modern art movement吧，我刚在托福语法题中看到的。

还有通才专才的问题我是说你用always太绝对了，换一个弱一点的词儿如often，ususally。

[ Last edited by tangjihede on 2005-8-12 at 11:17 ]

meautoUID: 2116250

Among Picasso’s many contributions to the history of art, his most important include pioneering the modern art movement called cubism, inventing collage as an artistic technique, and developing assemblage (constructions of various materials) in sculpture.
Microsoft ? Encarta ? 2006. ? 1993-2005 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved.

tangjihedeUID: 2107695

vi and vt. okay.