Issue144 【7\8\9\10】作文小组 第四次作业 7.24

DemiquaverUID: 203651

Issue 144 It is the artist, not the critic, who gives society something of lasting value.

I fundamentally agree with the speaker that the artist gives something of lasting value to society. However, the effect of critic cannot be denied.

Apparently, each great work of art is always accompanied with amounts of criticism. To my point of view, it’s the lasting value of the work that attracts the critics’ attention and made comments on it continually. Compare with the great art works, almost nothing has such exuberant vitality that can circulate generation by generation as well as the composers of them. With special life experience and peculiar thinking of it, artists, who apply diverse art styles with their unique compose techniques, express different life tastes of human beings. In spite of living in different era, the characteristic of humanity in the works of art, good or evil, virtuous or despicable, brave or cowardly, are apprehensible. Reading the novel of ‘The Old Man and the Sea’ by Ernest Miller Hemingway, we learn the indomitable spirit from the old man struggled with the ferocious ocean. No matter when and where can people find mirrors from the art works reflect their lives, which is of lasting value created by artists for human civilization.

However, not all kinds of the art styles, such as paintings, poems and so forth, are intelligible for the masses, which are abstracted by the artists and made with their inimitable art techniques. Nevertheless, such styles of art are not abandoned by the commons. The painting ‘Vase with Fifteen Sunflowers’ of Van Gogh is preserved well in art gallery, poetry anthology of Johann Wolfgang von Goethe has been republished over and over in different languages. Thanks to critics, those who are familiar with particular art styles, know the certain artist’s compose habit and experienced in appreciation, we have access to understand the work through criticism. Furthermore, follow professional appraisals with contemporaneous perspectives, common readers may comprehend the art production, although the background of the composer is absolute different, which maintain the work of lasting value even eternal.

Additionally, lots of the criticism and appraisals on art productions are great works as well, which probably establish a system of study for the certain art production. As we learn not only the works of Shakespeare but also the outstanding comments in school, the study of Shakespeare literature develops ceaselessly.

The great works of art that are of lasting value are like the boats, which made by artists, in the river of human civilization history, while the critics make oars for the boats, give them impetus of advance.

warboyUID: 2444492

Issue 144 It is the artist, not the critic, who gives society something of lasting value.I fundamentally agree with the speaker that the artist gives something of lasting value to society. However, the effect of critic cannot be denied（是否有‘影响被否定’这种说法？你可一些作用被忽视！）.(开头最还再斟酌一下)

Apparently, each great work of art is always accompanied with amounts of criticism. To my point of view, it’s the lasting value of the work that attracts the critics’ attention and made comments on it continually. Compare with the great art works, almost nothing has such exuberant vitality that can circulate generation by generation as well as the composers of them.With special life experience and peculiar thinking of it, artists, who apply diverse art styles with their unique compose techniques, express different life tastes of human beings. In spite of living in different era, the characteristic of humanity in the works of art, good or evil, virtuous or despicable, brave or cowardly, are apprehensible. (不错，看来你对文学类很有心得！)Reading the novel of ‘The Old Man and the Sea’ by Ernest Miller Hemingway, we learn the indomitable spirit from the old man struggled with the ferocious ocean. No matter when and where can people find mirrors from the art works reflect their lives, which is of lasting value created by artists for human civilization.（佩服你扯的能力!向你学习！）

However, not all kinds of the art styles, such as paintings（fine arts）, poems and so forth, are intelligible for the masses, which are abstracted by the artists and made with their inimitable art techniques. Nevertheless, such styles of art are not abandoned by the commons (这个转折有点莫名其妙)。The painting ‘Vase with Fifteen Sunflowers’ of Van Gogh is preserved well in art gallery, poetry anthology of Johann Wolfgang von Goethe has been republished over and over in different languages.（你这是想说啥？在支持或反对什么？说明一下吧！） Thanks to critics, those who are familiar with particular art styles, know the certain artist’s compose habit and experienced in appreciation, we have access to understand the work through criticism. Furthermore, follow professional appraisals with contemporaneous perspectives, common readers may comprehend the art production, although the background of the composer is absolute different, which maintain the work of lasting value even eternal.

（你对我评论道：“干脆都找几个方面，还是从艺术家的角度来论述。”从你的文章中我发现你是在广义上反对作者的观点吧？即critic是有用的他们能帮助我们理解art，但是从你的角度看你是如何说明的：maintain the work of lasting value even eternal，即critic的价值在于maintain artvalue但这是否就表明这就是critic具有永恒的社会价值呢？）

Additionally, lots of the criticism and appraisals on art productions are great works as well, which probably establish a system of study for the certain art production. As we learn not only the works of Shakespeare but also the outstanding comments in school, the study of Shakespeare literature develops ceaselessly.The great works of art that are of lasting value are like the boats, which made by artists, in the river of human civilization history, while the critics make oars for the boats, give them impetus of advance.

由于本人水平也有限啦！所以在这提点愚见，总体上给人感觉不错，但问题出在你围绕critic的作用再说事时是否又跑题的嫌疑。你看啊，如果你想反驳作者的观点的话，你的立足点应该是critic能否产生lasting social value，但你说的是critic对我们有帮助。这其实回到了我文章中第三段想说的内容。即强调critic对我们理解art是有帮助的。只不过我强调是在现代社会我们没有时间的情况下！所以你的后两段和我的展开部分的第三段在本质上是相同的，你可以品味一下。咱们文章的主要不同是：我论证了c对a有反作用，而你没有。还有一点我没你做得好的地方就是，你可以大段论证a对社会的影响，而我由于在论证上的欠缺，没有在这方面进行有力的论证，这是我文章失败的原因，也是我最大的跑题嫌疑之处。

我文章的第三段（供参考）：the plain fact is that in our era, we actually need some critic’s aid based the following reason:First, the fast-peace live prevent us from having enough time to understand and appreciate art; second, the glut of art, which is less of value, can be filtered by the critic. The critics are always familiar with the artists and their particular works, so they have more authority than the layman. And they can help us learn the content of the art and understand what the artist hope to express as possible as quickly aimed at saving our time. Meanwhile, we are forced to concede that nowadays, so-called excellent works amount to be best-selling, but most of them are just created based on the purpose of attracting consumer and not less of article value. For avoiding squandering our energy on such works, the critic is necessary.

silentpatUID: 2513238

Furthermore, follow(following) professional appraisals with contemporaneous perspectives, common readers may comprehend the art production(works), although the background of the composer is absolute different(although the backgrounds of the composers are various absolutely(我不知道您是不是要表达这个意思)，如果是指评论家的背景与原作者不同，我觉得最好写清楚although the background of critics is absolutely different from the composer), which maintain(maintains因为如果指代是common readers may comprehend the art works这件事，那从句的主语就是这句话而不是common readers) the work of lasting value even eternal
您的意思是不是说common readers理解和接受了艺术作品这件事使得艺术作品获得了eternal value？如果是，我建议调整一下语序，让后面的从句跟紧些，把让步调到前面，尽管看起来有点怪。这样一隔开确实很容易产生歧义

第一段不是影响被否定，是作用，我觉得没有问题。但似乎太过简单了

第二段那个转折是有点怪，没有词霸我也看不懂。我觉得不是表达的问题，关键是一个masses我开始以为是说作品，看了后面才知道前面也是指大众。词量还是太小，惭愧……

关于跑题这个问题，我没太懂楼上的意思。作者的意思不是帮助理解，是说评论本身也是优秀的艺术作品，更是一种创作，我觉得不会跑题。跑题的问题，我在和另一个人讨论时提到过，不是在lasting social value上，而是在give上，这个give应该理解为赋予呢还是创造，如果是创造，第三个论点外的前两个反而有些跑题。

而且，……还有个问题就是怎么没有结尾段呢？别人（考过的人）教我的经验是开头一段好歹表明态度，然后把分论点都提一遍，这样字数也多些了；结尾段我也不知道怎么写，我一般是把论点再改写一遍，这个还在研究。

很高兴能与您讨论。不知您是否有兴趣与我一起习作呢？:loveliness: 希望得到您的帮助，谢谢
我写的144，论点与您的有些接近，希望您指正
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-860861-1-1.html

[ 本帖最后由 silentpat 于 2008-7-27 09:32 编辑 ]

DemiquaverUID: 203651

谢谢你的修改，关于跑题与否我们还可以再讨论讨论。

我最初的想法是这样的：

是艺术家创造了永恒的有价值的艺术作品，但是艺术评论家的作用不能忽视，两者结合推进艺术发展。

我在第三段想表达的是，有了艺术家的创造，再加上艺术评论家的工作，使得很多艺术品更永恒。前提还是艺术家创造，评论家是辅助。当然英文表达水平有限，出来的文字都已经和原意有差距了。
同时我认为maintain art value既不是艺术家也不是评论家干的。我不应该用maintain这个词。

还有，我这样的结构和逻辑+论述更像是在表达两者都give us sth of lasting value。