【09年1月-4月】TOEFL作文互改小组-之【TWE作文】第五次作业.2.1号作业by Amber

Amber0926UID: 2555355

By illustrating which manner that employees work five days or four days a week is an optimal choice:the reading passage believe that people work four days a week is better in every aspect; however, the lecturer completely challenges the reading passage.

To begin with, the reading maintains that the shortened workweek will increase the company profits. In contrast, the professor asserts that the company will spend more money and time to their employees. For example, when the company hire new employees,they should provide much more training courses and medical welfare to new employees. In addition, new employees need more work places and more new computer than before. In fact, the company is hard to increase company profits in the end. This directly contradicts what the reading indicates.

Moreover, the writer claims that the shortened workweek not only benefit to individual but also promote the whole society development, which will increase employment rate. However, the lecture points out that there are much more work available if people work four days in a week. Because the company might be make people work more times to make up the differences that as the same work of five days a week.It will give rise to reduce the interest and activity of staffs.Therefore, this is another part where the lecture denies.

Finally, the reading passage states that a four days workweek will be better for individual employees, for they could spend more free time and improve their quality of lives. The lecture refutes this point by stating that staffs have more extra time will reduce their quality of lives, because it will lead to the employees lose their job abilities in a long time rest and also the staffs who enjoy a shorten workweek may be lost a lot of promotion opportunities. So the lecture totally disagree with the view made in the reading .

acai1118UID: 2338482

第二个观点 有点混乱 however后面的points没有给reason支持

建议你去看一下那个叫ibt6.21的 我觉得他写得很不错

acai1118UID: 2338482

还有就是开头的模板感觉太强了 我不知道说对没有

sunnylingUID: 2499568

By illustrating which manner that employees work five days or four days a week is an optimal choice(感觉和另一位一样，模板感强):the reading passage believes that people work four days a week is better in every aspect; however, the lecturer completely challenges the reading passage.






To begin with, the reading maintains that the shortened workweek will increase the company profits. In contrast, the professor asserts that the company will spend more money and more time to their employees. For example, when the company hire new employees,they should provide much more training courses and medical welfare to new employees. In addition, new employees need more work places and more new computer than before. In fact, the company is hard to increase company profits in the end. This directly contradicts what the reading indicates.






Moreover, the writer claims that the shortened workweek not only benefit to individual but also promote the whole society development, which will increase employment rate. However, the lecture points out that there are much more work available if people work four days in a week. Because the company might be make people work more times to make up the differences that as the same work of five days a week.It will give rise to reduce the interest and activity of staffs.Therefore, this is another part where the lecture denies. 好像听漏了一点？





Finally, the reading passage states that a four-day workweek will be better for individual employees, for they could spend more free time and improve their quality of lives. The lecture refutes this point by stating that staffs have more extra time will reduce their quality of lives, because it will lead to the employees lose their job abilities in a long time rest and also the staffs who enjoy a shorten workweek may be lost a lot of promotion opportunities. So the lecture totally disagree with the view made in the reading .  

总的还可以哈，学习一下。