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[求助] TOEFL 2009上半年-Dark_Tournament写作组 yoyodandy 第15次作业 [复制链接]

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发表于 2009-3-23 20:23:58 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
本帖最后由 yoyodandy 于 2009-3-23 20:25 编辑

One of my sisters told me that she got a job from a famous company because of her competitive personal statement. It is true that having a good level of writing does help to our daily lives, I personally accept that to speak well is more important than to write well. A man can write well doesn’t equal to he can express himself well. My reasons are as follow.
      To start with, speaking well can help people increase their sense of achievement. One research showed that 80% of people who have a good eloquence are much more successful that those who don’t. There is a noted person named Abraham Lincoln who is one of the celebrated American Presidents. As is known to all, when he was a young man, he took a job as a lawyer which had a great influence on his later career. He would not be the president if he didn’t have a good ability of speaking.
     In addition, it is speaking well that gives us more chance to make more friends. The figure written in a newspaper recently said that many people want their friends to be talkative so that it won’t be boring when all the people gather tighter. Speaking well is essential to everybody in daily life. There are much more examples that I can show you. Take interview as an example, the sister who got the job doesn’t do much well than the people who took the interview with her. The key to her success is she gave the employer a good impression on her statement. We can learn from her that the more we express ourselves, the more we can grasp the opportunity.
    Also, we can not deny the good ways that writing gives us. Without writing, we can not get the information which passed from our accentor. We know more about the science and technology because of the writing. Thanks to the writing pieces we can save a lot of in exploring the things the ancient people had already found.
    Although writing well does have good to our lives, the advantages that it has can not compare with the advantages speaking brings. That why I think speaking well can let other people know much more things about you and can give you more chances to reach your goal.
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发表于 2009-3-28 23:21:12 |只看该作者
One of my sisters told me that she got a job from(in) a famous company because of her competitive personal statement. It is true that having a good level of writing does help to(in) our daily lives,(however,) I personally accept that to speak well is more important than to write well. A man(who) can write well {doesn’t(is not) equal to}改成does not necessarily mean查一下equal的英文解释 he can express himself well. My reasons are as follow(s).
      To start with, speaking well can help people increase their sense of achievement.看你后面的论证是说好口才有助于成功,但是你这句话说的是成功的sense. One research showed that 80% of people who have a good eloquence(are eloquent) are much more successful( have a better chance to success than) that删掉 those who don’t. There is a noted person named Abraham Lincoln who is one of the celebrated American Presidents. As is known to all, when he was a young man, he took a job as a lawyer which had a great influence on his later career. He would not be the president if he didn’t have a good ability of speaking. ( U+ `3 r9 r# g. o- x) j$ `% @
     In addition, it is speaking well that gives us more chance to make more friends. The(A) figure written in a newspaper recently said that many people want their friends to be talkative so that it won’t be boring when all the people gather tighter拼写. Speaking well is essential to everybody in daily life. There are much more examples that I can show you. Take interview as an example, the(my) sister who got the job doesn’t do much well than the people who took the interview with her.这句话有歧义。Sisiter个人称述做得好,难道不叫在面试中do well 吗? The key to her success is she gave the employer a good impression on her statement. We can learn from her that the more we express ourselves, the more we can grasp the opportunity.这句话个跟前句话逻辑有点问题,你sister是因为个人称述做得好得到工作,这不意味着我们表达自己越多就越好。
    Also, we can not deny the good ways细化一下good ways感觉太大,不明确,用词确切些 that writing gives us. Without writing, we can not get the information which (is)passed from our accentor. We know more about the science and technology because of the writing(written records). Thanks to the writing(written) pieces(,) we can save a lot of in exploring the things the ancient people had already found.(we are saved a lot of trouble of facts our ancestors found years ago)
    Although writing well (does have good)太口语化改为means a lot或其他 to our lives, the advantages that it has can not(be) compared with the advantages speaking brings. That(is why) why I think speaking well can let other people know much删 more things about you and can give you more chances to reach your goal.


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RE: TOEFL 2009上半年-Dark_Tournament写作组 yoyodandy 第15次作业 [修改]

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TOEFL 2009上半年-Dark_Tournament写作组 yoyodandy 第15次作业
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