【喜洋洋杀G大队】pinoku，7月7号作业

pinokuUID: 2435028

Issue 59


According to this statement,the arguer asserts that we place too much emphasis on role models.And instead of copying others,we should learn to think and act independently and thus make the choices best for us.As for me,I concede that role modles are to some degree helpful to us.However,I strongly agree the speaker that people should learn to think and act independently to make the best choices for them.
Admittedly,role modles,defined as the best ones in a certain area,own some merits which are beneficial for some aspects of our life no matter learning,working or studying.It goes without saying that role modles succeed by overcoming different kinds of  difficulties,and accumulating lot of precious experience which are great treasure for all of us.For example,if we cast a look back at the development of science, we will be inevitably impressed by the works and personalities of the great scientists who promoted the improvement of science.They teaches us a lot.Newton,coming up with the gravity principle only through the phenomen that apples always drop to the ground but not the sky,taught us how to observe this world as well as how to think and deduce from these phenomenon.In a not dissimilar way,Beethoven is celebrated by us for his encourage and tenacity when he faced with deafness.What is more important that what he did encourage us to face difficulties appearing in our life.What is more,Those names---Bruno,Hawkin,Bill Gates and so on,are deemed as the symbol from which we draw spiritual wealth helpful for all of us.
However,learning role models is not equal to completely copying their behaviors,that is too much emphasis means blindness.There is a time and place for role models to succeed.Considering the time is changing ,the environment,and personalities of individuals are different largely for different people, maybe this is not the case at all if we simply repeat role model's behaviors.There is no where more true than on the issue of education.There is an increasing number of people in China claiming that the way of education in western world is far more beneficial to the development of childrenl,because western world lay more emphasis on individuality.However,these people fails to take into account the other factors which prohibit education in China,thus make it impossible for us to enforce the way of education as the western world does.For example,China is a developing country and educational resources are limited to satisfy every students.As a result,our education pays more attention to the development of students as a whole,and of course neglects the requirement of every student as an individual.Moreover,many Chinese college students drop out of school and set up their own business in order to build their own "Microsoft" as Bill Gates did in Harvard.Yet most of them fails for the reason that their capability has not enough and China to some extent lacks the mature environment for college students to start their business.
What is more,independent thinking also plays a vital role in an individual'a success.After all,creativity springs from independent thinking not just copying role models.For example,when numerous college students majoring in computer were following Bill Gate's root and inclined to set up the same kind of companies like "Microsofe",Larry Page and Sergey Brin began to think from another perspective and finally built their own kingdom---"google".Beethoven,for instance,were influenced largely by his predecessor---Mozart,Haydn who were great musicians in the world.But he formed the distinct style to achieve the final success.
Deep down,copying role models and independent thinking are both important for our life.The best way is to think independently according to our own situation on the basis of learning the essence of role models. For example,China followed the style of the Soviet Union at the earlier stage of the construction of socialism.However,as the time went by and this model was not suitable for China any more.Therefore,China enforced the policy of reform and opening-up according to its own condition,and achieve great success in the development of society and economics.
In summary,I admit that role models are of great importance to our life.Nonetheless,independent thinking is also significant to make the best choice.In the final analysis,the optimal approach,in my opinion,is a balance one between copying role models and thinking independently.



A65

In this argument,the arguer recommends that the chain of cheese stores should discontinue stocking imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses to reduce expense and improve profits.To justify this claim,the arguer provides the evidence that the five best-selling cheeses at the newest store were all domestic last year.Moreover,the result of a recent survey by Cheeses of the World magazine is shown that an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers.However,careful analysis of this argument would reveal that it suffers from several critical flaws and therefore is unconvincing.
To begin with,the mere fact that the five best-selling cheeses at the newest store are domestic cheeses is not sufficient to convince the popularity of domestic cheeses.The arguer fails to take into account the other factors that would lay influence on sell.For example,the domestic cheeses sold the most were on discount during the last year for the reason that the newest store had to attract consumers.If so,we of course would doubt the arguer's conclusion that the domestic cheeses are more popular than imported cheeses.Furthermore,even if the domestic cheeses are really welcomed,it is arbitrary for the arguer to deduce that they are also the best-selling cheeses in other stores throughout the United States.It is highly possible that people in other places do not like domestic cheese.Without any information about the other cheese stores' selling,we cannot trust the recommendation drew from this argument.
What is more,the survey conducted by Cheeses of the World magazine is not persuasive.The major problem of the survey is how many subscribers are there?What is possible is that the number of the subscribers is too small to demonstrate its vadility.Even if there are enough subscribers,how many people answer the question of the survey?If there is only a small fraction of the total number of the subscribers response the survey,the result is not representative.Moreover, the arguer neglects the differences of people's opinions between different regions.I mean,no evidence is shown that the magzine covers all regions as the cheese stores do,and the responses are able to represent the opinions of all the regions.If not,the arguer obviously make a hasty conclusion that the domestic cheeses are popular around the United States.
Additionally,there is no data to demonstrate that imported cheeses are not profitable.Though imported cheeses are not as popular as domestic cheeses,they have higher price,and may be more profitable than domestic chesses.Without such analysis,the recommendation to discontiue the imported cheeses will possibly turn out to reduce profit.In fact,other factors except limiting inventory are also helpful for reducing expense and increasing profit.For example,the cheese stores could consider the way of reducing the expense of transportation.In addition,it is better for a store to consider more methords of selling products rather than reduce the store of produce to increase profits.
In summary,this argument has several patent fallacies which render it logically unacceptable as it stands.To strengthen the argument,the arguer would have to demonstrate that domestic cheeses are popular around the United States.Furthermore,we need more information that imported cheeses are not profitable than domestic cheeses,and reducing inventory is really the best way to improve profits.

ncnysUID: 2347325

1# pinoku

According to this statement,the arguer asserts that we place too much emphasis on role models.And instead of copying others,we should learn to think and act independently and thus make the choices best for us.As for me,I concede that role modles are to some degree helpful to us.However,I strongly agree the speaker that people should learn to think and act independently to make the best choices for them.开门见山很好,不过第二句完全重复论题

Admittedly,role modles,defined as the best ones in a certain area,妙!own some merits which are beneficial for some aspects of our life no matter learning,working or studying.It goes without saying that role modles succeed by overcoming different kinds of  difficulties,and accumulating lot of precious experience which are great treasure for all of us.For example,if we cast a look back at the development of science, we will be inevitably impressed by the works and personalities of the great scientists who promoted the improvement of science.They teaches us a lot.Newton,coming up with the gravity principle only through the phenomen that apples always drop to the ground but not the sky,taught us how to observe this world as well as how to think and deduce from these phenomenon.In a not dissimilar way,Beethoven is celebrated by us for his encourage and tenacity when he faced with deafness.What is more important that what he did encourage us to face difficulties appearing in our life.What is more,Those names---Bruno,Hawkin,Bill Gates and so on,are deemed as the symbol from which we draw spiritual wealth helpful for all of us.这段强调了model有什么贡献,但是没有把copying model的好处论述出来

However,learning role models is not equal to completely copying their behaviors,that is too much emphasis means blindness.There is a time and place for role models to succeed.Considering the time is changing ,the environment,and personalities of individuals are different largely for different people, maybe this is not the case at all if we simply repeat role model's behaviors.There is no where more true than on the issue of education.There is an increasing number of people in China claiming that the way of education in western world is far more beneficial to the development of childrenl,because western world lay more emphasis on individuality.However,these people fails to take into account the other factors which prohibit education in China,thus make it impossible for us to enforce the way of education as the western world does.教育模式跟role model是一个概念吗?因为你之前把role model定义为best people in areas.For example,China is a developing country and educational resources are limited to satisfy every students.As a result,our education pays more attention to the development of students as a whole,and of course neglects the requirement of every student as an individual.Moreover,many Chinese college students drop out of school and set up their own business in order to build their own "Microsoft" as Bill Gates did in Harvard.Yet most of them fails for the reason that their capability has not enough and China to some extent lacks the mature environment for college students to start their business.这段的论证有点散

What is more,independent thinking also plays a vital role in an individual'a success.After all,creativity springs from independent thinking not just copying role models.For example,when numerous college students majoring in computer were following Bill Gate's root and inclined to set up the same kind of companies like "Microsofe",Larry Page and Sergey Brin began to think from another perspective and finally built their own kingdom---"google".Beethoven,for instance,were influenced largely by his predecessor---Mozart,Haydn who were great musicians in the world.But he formed the distinct style to achieve the final success.
Deep down,copying role models and independent thinking are both important for our life.The best way is to think independently according to our own situation on the basis of learning the essence of role models. For example,China followed the style of the Soviet Union at the earlier stage of the construction of socialism.However,as the time went by and this model was not suitable for China any more.Therefore,China enforced the policy of reform and opening-up according to its own condition,and achieve great success in the development of society and economics.

In summary,I admit that role models are of great importance to our life.Nonetheless,independent thinking is also significant to make the best choice.In the final analysis,the optimal approach,in my opinion,is a balance one between copying role models and thinking independently.

lollipops80UID: 2619379

Issue 59

According to this statement, the arguer asserts that we place too much emphasis on role models. And instead of copying others, we should learn to think and act independently and thus make the choices best for us. As for me, I concede that role modles are to some degree helpful to us. However, I strongly agree the speaker that people should learn to think and act independently to make the best choices for them.重复了
Admittedly, role modles, defined as the best ones in a certain area, own some merits which are beneficial for some aspects of our life no matter learning, working or studying. 这个太绝对了吧It goes without saying that role modles succeed by overcoming different kinds of
difficulties,and accumulating lot of precious experience which are great treasure for all of us. For example,if we cast a look back at the development of science, we will be inevitably impressed by the works and personalities of the great scientists who greatly promoted the improvement of science. They teach us a lot. Newton, coming up with the gravity principle only through the phenomen that apples always drop to the ground but not fly into the sky, taught us how to observe this world as well as how to think and deduce from these phenomenon. In a not dissimilar way, Beethoven is celebrated by us for his encourage and tenacity when he faced with deafness.What is more important is that he did encourage us to face difficulties appearing in our life.What is more, those models---Bruno,Hawkin,Bill Gates and so on, are deemed and from them we draw the priceless spiritual wealth.改了一下，本来的句子结构不清楚
However, learning role models is not equal to completely copying their behaviors. Too much rigidity means blindness.There is a time and place for role models to succeed. Considering time is changing, the environment,and personalities of individuals are different largely for different people, maybe the result wil be quite different if we simply repeat role model's behaviors. Education can be taken as a suitable example.本来的写法不太妥当There is an increasing number of people in China claiming that the way of education in western world is far more beneficial to the development of childrenl,because western world lay more emphasis on individuality.However,these people fails to take into account the other factors which prohibit the progression of education in China（thus make it impossible for us to enforce the way of education as the western world does此句不通去掉后半句）.For example,China is a developing country and educational resources are limited to satisfy every students.As a result,our education pays more attention to the development of students as a whole,and of course neglects the specific requirement of every student as an individual.Moreover,many Chinese college students drop out of school and set up their own business in order to build their own "Microsoft" as Bill Gates did in Harvard.Yet most of them fails for the reason that their capability has not enough and China to some extent lacks the mature environment for college students to start their business.大学生学习bill gates创业的例子不错的
What is more,independent thinking also plays a vital role in an individual'a success.After all,creativity springs from independent thinking not just copying role models.For example,when numerous college students majoring in computer were following Bill Gate's root应该是road吧 and inclined to set up the same kind of companies like "Microsofe",Larry Page and Sergey Brin began to think from another perspective and finally built their own kingdom---"google".Beethoven,for instance,were influenced largely by his predecessor---Mozart,Haydn who were great musicians in the world.But he formed the distinct style to achieve the final success.
Deep down 什么意思？？,copying role models and independent thinking are both important for our life.The best way is to think independently according to our own situation on the basis of learning the essence of role models. For example,China followed the style of the Soviet Union at the earlier stage of the construction of socialism.However,as the time went by and this model was not suitable for China any more.Therefore,China enforced the policy of reform and opening-up according to its own condition,and achieve great success in the development of society and economics.这个例子也很不错的
In summary,I admit that role models are of great importance to our life.Nonetheless,independent thinking is also significant to make the best choice.In the final analysis,the optimal approach,in my opinion,is a balance one between copying role models and thinking independently. 最后结尾与倒数第二段有点差距了，应该是absorb roles’ spirits and create something new那种吧，而不能说是一种平衡。
总体来说，有不错的例子，但是有些句子太长了以至于发生混乱和错误，建议必要时改短吧。总体的思路还是都ok的，满全面的。每个标点后记得加入空格。否则进入word都是绿线…

lollipops80UID: 2619379

A65

In this argument,the arguer recommends that the chain of cheese stores should discontinue stocking imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses to reduce expense and improve profits.To justify this claim,the arguer provides the evidence that the five best-selling cheeses at the newest store were all domestic last year.Moreover,the result of a recent survey by Cheeses of the World magazine shows an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers.However,careful analysis of this argument would reveal that it suffers from several critical flaws and therefore is unconvincing.
To begin with,the mere fact that the five best-selling cheeses at the newest store are domestic cheeses is not sufficient to convince me of the popularity of domestic cheeses.The arguer fails to take into account the other possible factors that would lay influence on sell.For example, the newest store might provide an attractive discount on domestic cheeses to attract consumers, which atctually promote the domestic cheese sales. 本来句子不通，改了If so,we of course would doubt the arguer's conclusion that the domestic cheeses are more popular than imported cheeses.Furthermore,even if the domestic cheeses are really welcomed,it is arbitrary for the arguer to deduce that they are also the best-selling cheeses in other stores throughout the United States.It is highly possible that people in other places do not like domestic cheese.Without any information about the other cheese stores' selling,we cannot trust the recommendation drew from this argument.
What is more,the survey conducted by Cheeses of the World magazine is not persuasive.The major problem of the survey is how many subscribers are there? If the number of the subscribers is too small, the result can not demonstrate its vadility.Even if there are enough subscribers,how many people answer the question of the survey?If there is only a small fraction of the total number of the subscribers response the survey,the result is not representative.Moreover, the arguer neglects the differences of people's opinions between different regions.I mean,no evidence is shown that the magzine covers all regions as the cheese stores do,and the responses are able to represent the opinions of all the regions.If not,the arguer obviously make a hasty conclusion that the domestic cheeses are popular around the United States.
Additionally,there is no data to demonstrate that imported cheeses are not profitable.Though imported cheeses are not as popular as domestic cheeses,they have higher price,and may be more profitable than domestic chesses.Without such analysis,the recommendation to discontiue the imported cheeses will possibly turn out to reduce profit.In fact,other factors except limiting inventory are also helpful for reducing expense and increasing profit.For example,the cheese stores could consider the way of reducing the expense of transportation.In addition,it is better for a store to consider more methords of selling products rather than reduce the store of produce to increase profits.
In summary,this argument has several patent fallacies which render it logically unacceptable as it stands.To strengthen the argument,the arguer would have to demonstrate that domestic cheeses are popular around the United States.Furthermore,we need more information that imported cheeses are not profitable than domestic cheeses,and reducing inventory is really the best way to improve profits.

攻击点都找的不错的，但是还是这个问题，遇到长句子有时候就会发生混乱，因此建议辟成短句子表达，其实也是可以的。