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[a习作temp] Argument185【Triple Week】第5次练习by newletter2002 [复制链接]

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发表于 2009-7-21 20:38:08 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
In this argument, the author gets the conclusion that the force change of the water flow on the first five floors of Sunnyside Towers is feasible. To thrength his verdict, he cites the fact that there is no problems with shower have been reported since the adjustment. And furthermore, the author also want to restrict water flow throughout all the 20 floors. The author draws the conclusion so fast that ingonres some core problems behand the surface.



In the firt place, the arguer insists that there is only a few complaints about low water pressure and no problems with shower have been reported. On the one hand, the arguer received only a few comlaints about low water pressure. It is possible that it is not easy for the user to get in touch with the faculty of the Tower apartment or the users do not have the sense to protect their rights. On the other hand, we cannot consider that there is be no problem of the adjustment since there is no problem reported now. The author does not metion how long has the adjustment lasted. Some problem might occur as time goes

by.



Even if I accept that there is no problem of the water flow adjustment on the first five floors, I still doubt at the suggestion to restrict water flow throughout all the 20 floors. This is obviously not the same case. Since the wate flow is reduced to 1/3 of its original force, maybe it effects a little for the first five floors, but it does not mean that the usage of the 20th floor will not be changed. Probably, the flow of the first five floor become somewhat smaller, while there is no water flow when the tap on higher floor is turned on. Unless the author give some provement or statistical data that the change of water flow will not effect the usage of higher floor can I accept the author's suggestion.



A third problem the arguer ingore is the savings for Sunnyside Corporation on the water flow change will not always be able to increase profits. Maybe there would be less and less users since the water floor change and the lose of this is much higher than the savings we get. And as a result we still do not increase our profits.



In sum, the arguer's suggestion that the water flow should be restricted throughout all the 20 floors is not well supported as it stands. To bolster is, the author must provide more evidence, such as there will be no problem in the future and the users will not complain about it. To better assess the recommendtion, I would also need to know the different between the water flow before and after the change and the users' real thought.
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发表于 2009-7-22 23:03:31 |只看该作者
Argument:
185The following appeared in a letter from the owner of the Sunnyside Towers apartment building to its manager.

"One month ago, all the showerheads on the first five floors of Sunnyside Towers were modified to restrict the water flow to approximately 1/3 of its original force. Although actual readings of water usage before and after the adjustment are not yet available, the change will obviously result in a considerable savings for Sunnyside Corporation, since the corporation must pay for water each month. Except for a few complaints about low water pressure, no problems with showers have been reported since the adjustment. Clearly, restricting water flow throughout all the 20 floors of Sunnyside Towers will increase our profits further."


In this argument, the author gets the conclusion that the force change of the water flow on the first five floors of Sunnyside Towers is feasible. To thrength(strengthen) his verdict, he cites the fact that there is no problems with shower have been reported since the adjustment. And furthermore, the author also want to restrict water flow throughout all the 20 floors. The author draws the conclusion so fast that ingonres some core problems behand the surface.



In the firt(first) place, the arguer insists that there is only a few complaints about low water pressure and no problems with shower(s) have been reported. On the one hand, the arguer received only a few comlaints about low water pressure. (两句合为一句)It is possible that it is not easy for the user to get in touch with the faculty of the Tower apartment or the users do not have the sense to protect their rights. On the other hand, we cannot consider that there is  be(去掉) no problem of the adjustment since(only through)  there is no problem reported now(no problem is reported now). The author does not metion how long has the adjustment lasted.(不是从装到现在一个月吗) Some problem might occur as time goes
by(这一点能不能稍微展开说更清楚啊).

Even if I accept that there is no problem of the water flow adjustment on the first five floors, I still doubt at the suggestion to restrict water flow throughout all the 20 floors. This is obviously not the same case. Since the wate flow is reduced to 1/3 of its original force, maybe it effects a little for the first five floors, but it does not mean that the usage of the 20th floor will not be changed. Probably, the flow of the first five floor become somewhat smaller, while there is no water flow(去掉) when the tap on higher floor is turned on. Unless the author give some provement(proofs) or statistical data that the change of water flow will not effect the usage of higher floor can I accept the author's suggestion. (读起来不顺啊)
A(The) third problem the arguer ingore is the savings for Sunnyside Corporation on the water flow change will not always be able to increase profits. Maybe there would be less and less users since the water floor change and the lose of this is much higher than the savings we get. And as a result we still do not increase our profits.

In sum, the arguer's suggestion that the water flow should be restricted throughout all the 20 floors is not well supported as it stands. To bolster is(it), the author must provide more evidence, such as(用whether之类的句子是不是不那么主观啊 ) there will be no problem in the future and the users will not complain about it. To better assess the recommendtion(recommendation), I would also need to know the different(difference) between(of) the water flow before and after the change and(一句最好不用两个and) the users' real thought.  

语言啊语言,我们的大问题~但只有表达清楚了 Ets才能看懂啊~
md 等我考完了我要吃鸡翅膀,鸡腿腿,鸡抄手……

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RE: Argument185【Triple Week】第5次练习by newletter2002 [修改]

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