ISSUE 213有拍必回，望不吝赐教

roughmanUID: 2685617

213"Too much emphasis has been placed on the need for students tochallenge the assertions of others. In fact, the ability to compromise and work with others -- that is, the ability to achieve social harmony -- should be a major goal in every school."


Thespeaker asserts that students should be taught to compromise and workwith others in order to construct a more harmonious society. Meanwhile,the speaker considers there are over emphasis on students to challengeothers. I concede the utilitarian need for people to compromisesomewhat but strongly oppose to the statement that it will generateharmony. To challenge is still a valuable spirit for students.

Admitted,at the first blush, confronting possible conflicts, compromise doeshave its own need. There are lots of team work and cooperation in contemporary society. How to work with others will necessarily involve something to compromise in order to avoid possible conflictor internecine. Under some circumstance, learning how to compromise totackle problems is a necessity in interpersonal ability, academic andprofessional work. Consider if we share totally different opiniontoward one goal or method, conflict will lead to abortion of the plan. Rapid and subtle compromise is lubricant to decline certain danger and maintain collaboration.So students are supposed to learn how to compromise and cooperate intheir school life, which will be positive to future life. Yet, thespeaker fails to account for certain consequence if compromise are overinstilled to students. If so, hardly can we expect students to beresilient and self-esteemed in their own creation and invention.Instead, students should learn the time they should give up and themoment they should stick to their willingness. Under most of thecircumstances, students should be confident and courageous to their owncomments and creation but not give up in the name of protecting harmonyand compromise. Truth and success will be established on hard work andconsistency.

Onthe contrary, the speaker divides the whole process into two differentones---challenging and compromising. Actually it is more consistent andlogically reliable to each other. On the one side, students may beimmature and underdeveloped in their own academic mastery in knowledge.Their compromise will take place when they do not understand one pointor another. On the other hand, challenging proves students' curiosity and trust to themselves as capable challenger. They together serve to make academic learning more completely.

Furthermore,as far as the students' challenge concerns, it is considered as aspirit of latitude, keeping a more stable harmony indeed. Throughlearner's consistent challenge and advancing, knowledge can be refreshedand updated to the foremost recognition. No matter what major is, opento be challenged are supposed to support the higher education pure andsublime despite some existing compromise and conflicts.  Recall thefilm "Good Will Hunting". The student in the film never stoppedhis arrogance and attempts to unravel and solve the problem. But in theend, actually the relationship between the student and the professorhad been much improved and became a pair of good friend and mentor-ship. Or recall our usual cooperation with reliable partner in lab or classroom. Will our mates get  angry and fall into quarrel always? I think not.

Insum, students are necessary to compromise in the light of the wholegoal if necessary. However, the advocated spirit still lies in courageand confidence to work for one's own conviction and pursuit. Tocompromise may settle one quarrel but stir up the harmony.

gukaguUID: 2668451

开头有点像argument，后面排版有些乱，很多单词中间的空格没有了，没看下去。

roughmanUID: 2685617

The speaker asserts that students should be taught to compromise and work with others in order to construct a more harmonious society. Meanwhile, the speaker considers there are over emphasis on students to challenge others. I concede the utilitarian need for people to compromise somewhat but strongly oppose to the statement that it will generate harmony. To challenge is still a valuable spirit for students.
再发一遍，不知道排版问题还有没有。

Admitted, at the first blush, confronting possible conflicts, compromise does have its own need. There are lots of team work and cooperations in contemporary society. How to work with others will necessarily involve something to compromise in order to avoid possible conflict or internecine. Under some circumstance, learning how to compromise to tackle problems is a necessity in interpersonal ability, academic and professional work. Consider if we share totally different opinion toward one goal or method, conflict will lead to abortion of the plan. Rapid and subtle compromise is lubricant to decline certain danger and maintain collaboration. So students are supposed to learn how to compromise and cooperate in their school life, which will be positive to future life. Yet, the speaker fails to account for certain consequence if compromise are over instilled to students. If so, hardly can we expect students to be resilient and self-esteemed in their own creation and invention. Instead, students should learn the time they should give up and the moment they should stick to their willingness. Under most of the circumstances, students should be confident and courageous to their own comments and creation but not give up in the name of protecting harmony and compromise. Truth and success will be established on hard work and consistency.


On the contrary, the speaker divides the whole process into two different ones---challenging and compromising. Actually it is more consistent and logically reliable to each other. On the one side, students may be immature and underdeveloped in their own academic mastery in knowledge. Their compromise will take place when they do not understand one point or another. On the other hand, challenging proves students' curiocity and trust to themselves as capable challenger. They together serve to make academic learning more completely.


Furthermore, as far as the students' challenge concerns, it is considered as a spirit of latitude, keeping a more stable harmony indeed. Through learner's consistent challenge and advancing, knowledge can be refreshed and updated to the foremost recognition. No matter what major is, open to be challenged are supposed to support the higher education pure and sublime despite some existing compromise and conflicts.  Recall the film "Good Will Hunting". The student in the film never stopped his arrogance and attempts to unravel and solve the problem. But in the end, actually the relationship between the student and the professor had been much improved and became a pair of good friend and mentor-ship. Or recall our usual cooperation with reliable partner in lab or classroom. Will our mates get angry and fall into quarrel always? I think not.


In sum, students are necessary to compromise in the light of the whole goal if necessary. However, the advocated spirit still lies in courage and confidence to work for one's own conviction and pursuit. To compromise may settle one quarrel but stir up the harmony.

青柠小可UID: 2662026

The speaker asserts that students should be taught to compromise and work with others in order to construct a more harmonious society. Meanwhile, the speaker considers (that) there are over emphasis on students to challenge others. I concede the utilitarian need for people to compromise somewhat but strongly oppose to the statement that it will generate harmony. To challenge is still a valuable spirit for students. （观点很明确）

Admitted, at the first blush, confronting possible conflicts, compromise does have its own need. There are lots of team work and cooperations in contemporary society. How to work with others will necessarily involve something to compromise in order to avoid possible conflict or internecine. Under some circumstance（复数）, learning how to compromise to tackle problems is a necessity in interpersonal ability, academic and professional work. Consider if we share totally different opinion toward one goal or method, conflict will lead to abortion of the plan. Rapid and subtle compromise is lubricant to decline certain danger and maintain collaboration. So students are supposed to learn how to compromise and cooperate in their school life, which will be positive to future life. Yet, the speaker fails to account for certain consequence if compromise are over instilled to students. If so, hardly can we expect students to be resilient and self-esteemed in their own creation and invention. Instead, students should learn the time they should give up and the moment they should stick to their willingness. Under most of the circumstances, students should be confident and courageous to their own comments and creation but not give up in the name of protecting harmony and compromise. Truth and success will be established on hard work and consistency. （支持和攻击并进，逻辑很强）

On the contrary（上面和这个没有对立关系）, the speaker divides the whole process into two different ones---challenging and compromising. Actually it is more consistent and logically reliable to each other. On the one side, students may be immature and underdeveloped in their own academic mastery in knowledge. Their compromise will take place when they do not understand one point or another. On the other hand, challenging proves students' curiosity and trust to themselves as capable challenger. They together serve to make academic learning more completely.

Furthermore, as far as the students' challenge concerns, it is considered as a spirit of latitude, keeping a more stable harmony indeed. Through learner's consistent challenge and advancing, knowledge can be refreshed and updated to the foremost recognition. No matter what major is, open to be challenged are supposed to support the higher education pure and sublime despite some existing compromise and conflicts.  Recall the film "Good Will Hunting". The student in the film never stopped his arrogance and attempts to unravel and solve the problem. But in the end, actually the relationship between the student and the professor had been much improved and became a pair of good friend and mentor-ship. Or recall our usual cooperation with reliable partner in lab or classroom. Will our mates get angry and fall into quarrel always? I think not.（这里最好做一下小总结）


In sum, students are necessary to compromise in the light of the whole goal if necessary. However, the advocated spirit still lies in courage and confidence to work for one's own conviction and pursuit. To compromise may settle one quarrel but stir up the harmony.（结尾了，最好给自己支持的结论多来点正面的总结，攻击可以减少了）

LZ的作文写得不错呢，论述有力，很有逻辑。一点点建议：每段明确要表述的内容后写主题句，首尾都写，这样能充实字数，还能保证不写偏方向。

青柠小可UID: 2662026

回楼主，你的文章我有很认真的在看，但我能力一般般啦，挑的错误有限，而且可能有说错的地方，请多包含哦！还有，我说错的地方请你告诉我~~(*^__^*)

nuaaskyUID: 2615912

本来要来互改的~来晚了一看有人帮看了~
不然一会儿再看吧~

nuaaskyUID: 2615912

这篇文章我来说说个人看法~

初读完这篇的时候，感觉有些稍稍的不对劲，问题在每一个分论点是否很好地支持了题目~

第一段用Admitted，貌似要用让步的写法，但是其实却不是让步。这段到了yet 的那个地方实际上转折了~那么那一段实际上拆成两段也可以。拆成两段可以让结构更容易让人明辨出来。如果你要让步的话，可以看下这个帖子：https://bbs.gter.net/thread-694709-1-2.html注意关于让步无意义的内容~

On the contrary, the speaker divides the whole process into two different ones---challenging and compromising.这段如楼上所说确实写得不好，主要是没看懂什么意思。这个process是什么？应该提一下的~这个on the contrary我也没看懂~这段我是没看懂什么意思，最后一句也不懂。依我看这段去掉也没什么影响

furthermore这段感觉也写得乱乱的。那个电影心灵捕手好像跟你这段要说的差的比较远吧。这电影是好电影，但感觉这里没有说清楚。

To compromise may settle one quarrel but stir up the harmony.这句话好像也说的有问题。to可以去掉的，stir up 我查了一下是vi，能不能这样用打个问号。

全文通读下来个人以为作者没有很好地把握这个话题，尽管写了500多字。有些乱乱的感觉。有些段落看不出作者想表达的意图。个人以为，好的essay应该是让读者读完一段就感觉有理，读到下一段就感觉能让读者感到就应该写这段~读完全文就是顺理成章的感觉。语言方面这篇没有严重的语法错误，仅有一些单词curiosity拼错了。但是个别句子读的费劲。我也不得不查了下词典才知道一些词组的用法。

除了上述的结构的问题外，对于这个问题的我觉得作者讨论的不深。作者是否知道“头脑风暴法”？这是一种集体讨论集思广益的方法。要应用这种方法要大家畅所欲言，但是坚决反对批评别人，也要求主持人在协调方面有一定能力，再加上一些规定来防止conflict来破坏气氛。这个方法是已经用了有二三十年了，有很多成功的例子，就能够证明challenge别人不和harmony矛盾~所以我自己是觉得我如果破这个题的话就说这两个不矛盾。其他的作者也可以想想。

最后，建议作者在通过大量阅读ETS的范文和其他的英文材料提高“顺理成章”的能力，至于表达通过多写你一定能提高。至于破题，你可以看看我给你的那个帖子，也可以参考别人的提纲对自己有所补充。
心灵捕手那部电影不错，建议回去把这个素材准备下，没准什么时候又用得上了呢。

个人意见，仅供参考~