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[活动] 11-11 第一次,希望大家不要嫌弃,写的是有点差,大家猛批 [复制链接]

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发表于 2009-11-11 22:05:25 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

In recent years, a controversy debated for quite lots of times, has been brought to the hub of the public, that is, whether government across the world should pay more attention on natural environment problems than economic development .Well, to some extent, the development degree of the domestic economic plays an more vital role in the fledging of one country than the other variable factors. Whereas, if you concern more on the whole society's sustainable development, you will get the same conclusion as me, that is, we government ought to set natural environment as the core of all issues.


Firstly, the protection of natural environment and the preserve of natural resources are not only our generation's wealth, but more importantly are the basement of our child generations for a wide range of time. Every time we achieve the environment protection ,we concentrate, for large degree, on children's better and brighter outlook. Take the lesson of the developing countries for example, in the first several phases of the industrial evolution, they indeed have accumulated great number of capital, however, in the meanwhile, they must pay off the sever damage to the natural environment such as air pollution, greenhouse effect, acid and so on. A statistics from the Times ever showed that the annual average temperature increases dramatically, nearly as an incredible speed as much as the one in a decade ago. If we could not prevent the tragedy, our generation may survive a nightmare in the future.


Secondly, as our economy have been improved to sufficiently advanced degree, we have to develop new type of economy, usually based on environment protection. We have to focus on discovering new energy as well as new technology to improve our efficiency. The harm-environment type of so called rough industry has became a history, what we must develop is the new method in which we can get the most output in terms of the least input as well as the cost of environmental damage. A friend of mine, Jack, a CEO of a mine factory firstly made minor profit in case of considerable air pollution. Under the regulation of the local government, he changed his corporation into a green factory ,and recently the income increases ,at the same time total pollution decreases apparently.



We can easily find a series of variable advantages besides those reasons, such as a healthier life to share, a happier feeling to have. However, we cannot denied the reinforcement of our effort to improve our domestic economy. It is still the foundation of our whole country, a highly developed and advanced economy can make our life colorful, and most of all, who will be satisfied with the wonderful environment in the situation of underdevelopment economy?


In all, we government must pay more attention to the environment protection, but we cannot ignore the development of the gross economy. To make the life of us and our children, let's work together to have a bright outlook.

  
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发表于 2009-11-12 21:49:09 |只看该作者
recent years, a controversy debated for quite lots of times, has been brought to the hub of the public, that is, whether government across the world should pay more attention on natural environment problems than economic development .Well, to some extent, the development degree of the domestic economic plays an more vital role in the fledging of one country than the other variable factors. Whereas, if you concern more on the whole society's sustainable development, you will get the same conclusion as me, that is, we government ought to set natural environment as the core of all issues
Firstly, the protection of natural environment and the preserve of natural resources are not only our generation's wealth, but more importantly are the basement of our child generations for a wide range of time. Every time we achieve the environment protection ,we concentrate, for large degree, on children's better and brighter outlook. Take the lesson of the developing countries for example, in the first several phases of the industrial evolution, they indeed have accumulated great number of capital, however, in the meanwhile, they mus
t pay off the sever
severedamage to the natural environment这个语法是不是有问题啊,是不是应该改为pay off for the severe damage of the natural environment
such as air pollution, greenhouse effect, acid rain and so on. A statistics from the Times ever showed that the annual average temperature increases dramatically, nearly as an incredible speed as much as the one in a decade ago. If we could not prevent the tragedy, our generation may survive a nightmare? in the future.


Secondly, as our economy have been improved to a sufficiently advanced degree, we have to develop new type of economy, usually based on environment protection. We have to focus on discovering new energy as well as new technology to improve our efficiency. The harm-environment type of so called rough industry has became a history, what we must develop is the new method in which we can get the most output in terms of the least input as well as the cost of environmental damage. A friend of mine, Jack, a CEO of a mine factory firstly made minor profit in case of (用在这里似乎 不合适吧)considerable air pollution. Under the regulation of the local government, he changed his corporation into a green factory ,and recently the income increases ,at the same time total pollution decreases apparently.# W- o& ~) " `3 F8 c# v4 A  L
We can easily find a series of variable advantages besides those reasons, such as a healthier life to share, a happier feeling to have. However, we cannot denied the reinforcement of our effort to improve our domestic economy. It is still the foundation of our whole country, a highly developed and advanced economy can make our life colorful, and most of all, who will be satisfied with the wonderful environment in the situation of underdevelopment economy?

In all, we government must pay more attention to the environment protection, but we cannot ignore the development of the gross economy. To
make the life? of us and our children, let's work together to have a bright outlook

结构很严密,论证和很详细,有些小的错误,
是不是考过G啊?

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RE: 11-11 第一次,希望大家不要嫌弃,写的是有点差,大家猛批 [修改]

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11-11 第一次,希望大家不要嫌弃,写的是有点差,大家猛批
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