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标题: 【独立写作】lee大乐的作业贴 [打印本页]

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-8-23 00:13:35 标题: 【独立写作】lee大乐的作业贴

本帖最后由 lee大乐于 2012-9-4 17:08 编辑

水平有限，敬请见谅。

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-8-28 23:13:19

本帖最后由 lee大乐于 2012-8-28 23:14 编辑

0828【Independent Writing】 Many teachers assign homework to students every day .Do you think that daily homework is necessary for student?Use specific reasons and detail to support your answer.
Since I have memory of study, I have my homework to do in every single night. Although few decades past have witness the enormous improvement in the education, there still are many teachers assign homework to students every day. In my shallow view , it is just necessary for teachers to do that while a bunch of people hold the opinion opposite to me.
   Firstly, though do homework every day to student is a boring thing sometime, that can help students to form a good learning habits. It seems to be no doubt that regular homework assignment always be the study stuff of primary-level or secondary-level education. During that period, students always not have enough self-discipline to make themselves sit behind the table, quietly, to study more and remember all the knowledge that teachers taught in class, regular homework can force them to be accustomed to review.
   Secondly , regular homework is an effective learning program to make the students to get the new information much deeper. Teachers always assign homework just coordinate closely with the class he/she just taught , and that can help the students to learn things through understanding and lead them to lay a solid foundation for the basic theory and knowledge.
   Admittedly, homework maybe too tedious to students to complete sometime and what we can do to transfer this is to add the more interesting and enlightening to homework. For example, combine a game to children to play with the families to try to make theory to reality.
In conclusion, I would like to say that I personally agree with the statement that homework assigned every day. After all, learning more stimulates kids’ brain growth and puts them in competitive social settings, which is indeed irreplaceable experience for such a critical stage of life.

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-8-29 22:18:41

0829作文：Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Nowadays, working at home is better than working in office.
When you mention about working at home, 30 years ago, others will laugh at you and say:”Are you joking?” But, with decades past, lifestyles have changes a lot, new things springing up in every fields, for example, the work style, like working at home, etc. Of course, it is a bunch of people still can not accept this view and think that is an incorrect thing. But, in my humble view, I think working at home is just a good way to make our work efficient, and the reasons just as follow.
Firstly, in spite of working in office can make people seem to have more opportunities to cooperate with others, working at home can save numerous time during work. Working together also means you should spend your time to take care of others, imagine that picture that when you go to office every morning, do you say hello to everyone or talk to colleague around in polite? The answer always be yes. And if you live far away from your office, you also waste more time on the way. Working at home just can save all above kinds of time for you to focus on your own work stuff.
What’s more, working at home give you more freedom to schedule your work plan. As we know, every single person have different work style, but in office, you have to follow the rigid time table which the company gives to you. May be you have to go to work at a regular time on the morning or have lunch at the middle of noon and so on. The schedule is more inflexible than working at home just all by yourself, what is the most efficient schedule for oneself , I guess just assign by themselves.
With the develop in technology, such as the communication technology and the Microsoft office system which make our work style alter a lot, such as, we can have meeting not only face to face, but also via the network to have a video conference at home, etc. those also turn the new work style that working at home into reality.In the information overload time , working at home not a dream, but get more and more convenience, even succeed with break boundaries of traditional work methods.
In conclusion, working at home in the proliferation of the internet time is likely to be more efficient and can cater more people’s different need of work, and help people to complete self-fulfilled to all the society.

作者: fisiksnju 时间: 2012-8-29 22:36:49

lee大乐发表于 2012-8-28 23:13
0828【Independent Writing】 Many teachers assign homework to students every day .Do you think that d ...

[attach]188513[/attach]
LZ加油！

作者: yayayyya 时间: 2012-8-30 20:13:17

已改好勿怪毒舌

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-8-30 23:45:31

憋了我半宿啊。。。。这个话题太不适合我了。。。

作者: 和尚的梳子 时间: 2012-8-31 21:07:59

你0830的文章我已修改请查收
[attach]188710[/attach]
里面提到一个问题求指教
下面是我的文章同求指教
https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mo ... xtra=#pid1776190804

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-1 21:47:52

来晚了，我错了~~

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-1 21:49:20

和尚的梳子发表于 2012-8-31 21:07
你0830的文章我已修改请查收

里面提到一个问题求指教

谢谢啦~~

作者: heverywhere 时间: 2012-9-2 00:11:24

本帖最后由 heverywhere 于 2012-9-2 00:14 编辑

抱歉，31作文交的有点晚，麻烦修改了~~

https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mo ... xtra=#pid1776169657

我修改的文章明天一定提交~~~ 辛苦啦~~~

作者: 和尚的梳子 时间: 2012-9-2 00:12:01

lee大乐发表于 2012-9-1 21:49
谢谢啦~~

也帮我修改一下吧！

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-2 01:29:18

和尚的梳子发表于 2012-9-2 00:12
也帮我修改一下吧！

不好意思，在修改中，这两天有点点事，耽误了，sorry，会尽快发过来的~

作者: heverywhere 时间: 2012-9-2 10:10:54

已改好，请查收~
LZ考GRE没？
[attach]188882[/attach]

作者: 惟妙惟肖 时间: 2012-9-2 20:41:20

同学你的0901的作业呢？？？？找不到啊，麻烦给个链接啊

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-3 00:26:40

惟妙惟肖发表于 2012-9-2 20:41
同学你的0901的作业呢？？？？找不到啊，麻烦给个链接啊

sorry，明天一定传上来，今天的网路有点不对头，一直上传不了附件。。

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-3 00:42:36

和尚的梳子发表于 2012-8-31 21:07
你0830的文章我已修改请查收

里面提到一个问题求指教

要求是大于300即可，没有上限，一旦满足300就不会被扣不必要的分数~放心。

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-3 00:45:05

heverywhere 发表于 2012-9-2 10:10
已改好，请查收~
LZ考GRE没？

看了你的修改哈，谢谢了~
不过我没有考过G哈，这次基本算是初次准备T，所以，估计是很多句子比较僵硬，所以，有点难以理解，我会更注意的哈·~谢谢啦~

作者: 张君临001 时间: 2012-9-4 13:51:51

这是我的写作贴，楼主有空可否帮忙修改？https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1438515-1-1.html

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-4 17:08:56

惟妙惟肖发表于 2012-9-2 20:41
同学你的0901的作业呢？？？？找不到啊，麻烦给个链接啊

0901的作业刚刚传上来。。。实在抱歉。。。

作者: 惟妙惟肖 时间: 2012-9-4 17:47:37

本帖最后由惟妙惟肖于 2012-9-4 23:18 编辑

0901~作文
也请你帮我改下作文！

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-5 23:44:25

又迟到了。我错了。。请大人们见谅。

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-5 23:49:23

各种晚。。。请达人们见谅。

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-11 23:52:53

终于憋出来了。。。不能再耽搁了，必须天天练手了！

作者: wuxiang0220 时间: 2012-9-12 20:06:57

已改

作者: 张君临001 时间: 2012-9-12 21:35:31

[attach]189794[/attach]
已改

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-13 00:48:42

谢谢亲。。

作者: moophis 时间: 2012-9-13 08:11:11

lee大乐发表于 2012-9-13 00:48
谢谢亲。。

FYI:2-3个论点都是可以接受的，关键在于你能不能有效地展开例证，能不能把道理说透，这是重点。只有一个论点但是完全说透远比罗列很多论点强的多。个人观点。

作者: moophis 时间: 2012-9-13 08:34:31

0912已改

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-16 01:34:30

moophis 发表于 2012-9-13 08:11
FYI:2-3个论点都是可以接受的，关键在于你能不能有效地展开例证，能不能把道理说透，这是重点。只有一个论 ...

完全赞成，更重要的是，你虽然观点不多，但是说理很清晰。这个写法我很喜欢，谢谢你的分享。

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-25 23:14:50

休息一周后的练手。。。生疏啊~~~

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-9-27 22:43:04

纠结死我了。。。

作者: 汐二萌sunshine 时间: 2012-9-28 00:59:45

大乐对不起啊我有事情耽误了你0925的作文我明儿早改了马上发给你哈

作者: niewenjuan123sd 时间: 2012-9-28 17:18:43

楼主很强加油

作者: 汐二萌sunshine 时间: 2012-9-28 19:01:31

改好了 ^0^

作者: 汐二萌sunshine 时间: 2012-9-28 19:27:53

楼主我刚才查了下词典最后一段不能用remodel 要用shift 脑残了请见谅 > <

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-10-1 22:55:23

有点晕了。。。感谢批改了。。。

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-10-1 23:20:28

汐二萌sunshine 发表于 2012-9-28 19:27
楼主我刚才查了下词典最后一段不能用remodel 要用shift 脑残了请见谅 >

没有哈~~实在感谢啦~

作者: 娜加 时间: 2012-10-2 01:43:24

改好，请查收。

作者: lain0119 时间: 2012-10-2 01:49:57

修改滴来啦

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-10-5 21:13:47

本帖最后由 lee大乐于 2012-10-5 22:14 编辑

总支，很纠结，总觉得这两点没有理清楚。

作者: niewenjuan123sd 时间: 2012-10-5 23:07:50

lee大乐发表于 2012-10-5 21:13
总支，很纠结，总觉得这两点没有理清楚。

大乐我这儿熄灯了这个电脑没有word 我明早一定给你好好改改好就传给你

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-10-5 23:52:03

niewenjuan123sd 发表于 2012-10-5 23:07
大乐我这儿熄灯了这个电脑没有word 我明早一定给你好好改改好就传给你

没事哈~~~你自己安排好就是哈，不要因为给我改作文耽误你自己的事哦~~

作者: niewenjuan123sd 时间: 2012-10-6 09:38:30

好了

作者: xiaobanI 时间: 2012-10-6 10:52:23

已改完:)

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-10-9 22:09:49

迟了很久，抱歉。

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-10-27 00:00:45

恩，1026，距离上篇作业已经20天了。。。不好，不能这样懒啦~

作者: hb5404 时间: 2012-10-27 21:13:07

已改~我的对这次话题想法见我的文章吧~https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mo ... xtra=#pid1776301345

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-12-24 00:35:46

感谢LZ大人无私分享和修改。这么晚才交上来，实在抱歉。

作者: mpromanus 时间: 2012-12-27 09:45:03

lee大乐发表于 2012-12-23 16:35
感谢LZ大人无私分享和修改。这么晚才交上来，实在抱歉。

To improve the quality of education，universities should spend more money on professors' salaries. Agree or not?

Perhaps no issue in the world is as significant to students as education. To face the dramatically increase of student group (I'm not sure what you intend to express by 'increase of..group' here. A 'group' is not something you can 'increase', only a certain numerically measureable property of a group is, like its size, number of members, productivity, etc. Judging from the next sentence you seem to mean 'the increase of numbers of students' rather than anything else.), we people always show our worries about the ability of the exiting education system, especially higher education, to ensure all of them acquire an even quality of education. Unfortunately, the truth (Which truth is 'the' truth? What you say here is not necessarily the one and only truth for everyone. If you meant to translate 事实告诉我们, it should actually be translated as 'facts'. But even this is very vague and shady because it doesn't really specify what exactly these 'facts' are. It simply deems some possibly non-existent, vague sources out there as 'facts'. This is why people will tell you Chinese is a very abstract or 'fuzzy' language. Start thinking about what exactly you mean when you use certain words.) tells us about the growing education quality gap between different universities, and even how this makes a nightmare for many students. So, to improve the situation, a plenty of people assert universities should spend more money on professors’ salaries.(The existence of a quality gap in education is not the only topic under the broad umbrella of 'the quality of education'. By citing the quality gap in your introduction, you're setting yourself a boundary for your discussion. This is fine for TOEFL, but as far as a proper argumentative essay goes, you should justify why you have chosen to mention this particular bit of the overall topic instead of talking about 'quality of education' as a general issue.) In my humble view, I just cannot hold an optimistic attitude.

First of all, the salary is not the only reason for professors to make a perfect schooling schedule and improve the quality of their courses (Again, I'm not really sure why you specifically mentioned 'schedule' here. Is it of particular relevance to the question or your opinion? You can't just hope to throw anything that is associated with 'professors' and/or 'education' into this essay and that it would all make sense, because not everything about 'professors' or 'education' is relevant to the particular question you need to address. Writing such 'random' details without properly displaying a good reason for doing it, is one of the foremost things to avoid in good academic writing. You might be able to get away with a bit of such randomness for TOEFL as long as you don't go completely off topic, but you won't be able to get away easily with it in your future papers, especially if your supervisor happens to be as demanding as I am..). Of course, it is no doubt that money is so important to every professor, at least for living. However, to ensure a high quality of his or her courses, there are some things more than the salary, for example, the research atmosphere and financial support (The problem here is that you started saying 'money is important but there are things more than the salary', then you go on to cite 'financial support' as a 'thing more than the salary', without making clear how this 'financial support' is different from 'salary' or 'money' in your argument. Remember, your readers are not likely to be academics. They probably don't know what 'financial support' means in an academic/research setting and how it is different from salaries.). We all known that professors and scholars are an solid power of enhancing one nation’s science development in every realm, and as teachers, they are unusually delighted (Why 'unusual'? I don't see ) to make all of their achievements service to their own education, and that is an efficient method which contributes to provide more education than schooling to students. (I don't see how this last sentence relates to your previous sentence, or to the point in this paragraph ('the salary is not the only reason for professors to improve the quality of their courses'), or indeed how it relates to the purpose of the entire essay, which is about improving the quality of education. This is the kind of off-topic 'randomness' that I warned you about.)

Moreover, professors should not be the only role to be responsible for the education quality; the university itself cannot be ignored. How the higher education is different from the primary education is that what the university should give to students is not only the theories in books, but also the stages in reality (I'm not understanding this. It doesn't make sense to me even in Chinese.). As a bridge between students and the society, aiming at cultivating all-round elites to devote to the society, universities should focus on the capacities of students to apply knowledge to the practical. Thus, requires universities to create a bunch (This has become a rather informal word now and I'm getting annoyed by how frequently it starts to appear in the essays recently. There are myriads of more formal ways to say 'a bunch of', like 'an array of', 'a handful of', 'many', or indeed, 'myriads of'..) of opportunities for students to accumulate experience and practice the skills, and gradually, develop themselves perfectly. (Where is the subject of this sentence?) In other words, improve the education quality of the university itself.(Again, a subjectless sentence. This is allowed for giving commands directly to people as imperatives, e.g. 'Come here', 'Go away', 'Eat your carrots'. But please don't write sentences like these in a formal essay. (Unless you're writing a linguistics paper on imperatives, that is..))

Finally, to improve education quality of higher education is also a significant issue for a/the country, even the whole society. Higher education represents the ability of development in some degree for a country: the more highly quality educated people (Even in Chinese you'd say 受过高等教育的人, not 被高等教育过的人, in the sense that the 教育 here is necessarily a noun, not a verb. The problem with Chinese seems to be that since nouns and verbs of related meaning are very often the same in form like 教育（名词） and 教育（动词）, Chinese speakers don't often consciously think about word categories like nouns and verbs when they speak, and therefore make all sorts of category agreement errors when they do English..) a country has, the more likely a promising future the country will have. To push forward the quality of higher education, the macroscopic policy and supervision by the government ('supervision of the government' tend to mean the government is being supervised, not that the government is doing the supervising..) is the strongest insurance. The government investing more in the education is a good thing for the population, and vice versa.

In conclusion, to the puzzle that is to improve the quality of education, only to pay more for the professors is still far away from the right answers. To be responsible for that, the university itself, the government and we people should all take part in solving this problem, and step forward hand-in-hand. (I finally see what your point is, and how your sub-points are supposed to be all relevant..but this overall idea in the conclusion paragraph is not expressed in the introduction at all. In other words, you only manage to clearly tell your readers what exactly your point is in the very last paragraph. (This is said to be typical behavior for 'formal writing' in Chinese though, or so I was told.) Put your point in the introduction and the conclusion. Yes, I'm telling you to repeat your point. Of course you'd try to rephrase it a little but essentially you need to clearly tell people what your point is both upfront and at the end.)

(An entirely irrelevant comment: I find the separate mentions of 'the government' and 'we people' in the last paragraph very interesting..in a way this very usage would sort of imply that 'the government' is separate and different from 'we people'. Well, I'd think that's perhaps a subtle reflection of the current social attitude in the country..)

总结：

结果我读完了的想法是这片文的最大问题是水准飘忽瓦。。不管是要说你冠词没有记得用，还是表意不准确，都是只有在文章的某些部分出现得比较频繁，并没有全篇都一直出现同样的问题。。所以我只能说请你保持注意力集中了吧哈哈。。另外请注意，不光是说同意与否，你的overall论点，也就是你在这个问题上所持的具体态度，就是那个神马解决教育质量问题不能光靠教授还要上靠领导下靠群众这句话，请在第一段清楚拿出来，而不是在第一段布背景介绍到最后一段才来总结陈词。。你不把论点一开始就清楚拿出来所以才会造成我一直在那边质疑你写这个为了什么写那个为了什么因为我不知道你写这些其实是为一个我不知道是这样的点服务的 = =

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-12-28 00:38:11

mpromanus 发表于 2012-12-27 09:45
To improve the quality of education，universities should spend more money on professors' salaries. ...

RO老师句句在理~~评价得我通体舒畅·~~任督二脉相通~~~
小朋友正疑惑于中式写作，望推荐能提升对英语本身的理解（特别是语言形成，文化之类的，能帮助形成地道语言思维）的相关材料（书、网页，erc.）
实在麻烦了~~~跪拜！

作者: mpromanus 时间: 2012-12-28 01:36:24

lee大乐发表于 2012-12-27 16:38
RO老师句句在理~~评价得我通体舒畅·~~任督二脉相通~~~
小朋友正疑惑于中式写作，望推荐能提升对英语本 ...

最重要的是你要看英文原文的材料，不要只看中文的介绍翻译。中文版可以拿来在英文版实在看不懂的时候参考一下，但不要靠那个来学英文。尤其是字典，要学会看英英字典而不是靠中文意思去学习英文词汇。

网站推荐wikipedia，虽然似乎在大陆被墙的。你可以先大致看一下中文维基百科的某个词条（比如，亚里士多德），然后连到其英文版本的Aristotle去看（维基百科每个词条页面左边都有这个词条在其他语言的版本的链接，很好用的）。可以学习词汇，也可以收集背景知识（话说我当年考的一个听力段子就是亚里士多德嘛。。）。

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-12-28 13:36:58

mpromanus 发表于 2012-12-28 01:36
最重要的是你要看英文原文的材料，不要只看中文的介绍翻译。中文版可以拿来在英文版实在看不懂的时候参考 ...

thanks a lot~~~~底子薄的人一定要更努力~:loveliness:

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2012-12-29 01:08:16

抠脑壳的丑文。。。啊。。。求指导~~

作者: shanche 时间: 2012-12-29 22:03:43

不好意思今天有点事情明天吧改的作文发你

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2013-1-5 21:56:22

最近感觉写作文口水话非常多。。。额。。。。sorry~

作者: ETS清洁工 时间: 2013-1-6 20:52:16

改好了晚了点~别见怪

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2013-1-7 18:02:50

总是超时。。。考试也肯定写不完。。。

作者: lee大乐 时间: 2013-1-7 18:03:51

ETS清洁工发表于 2013-1-6 20:52
改好了晚了点~别见怪

没有哈，这个本来就是大家相互学习的过程，当然在不耽误各自事情的前提下哦~~~加油加油~~~

作者: 月明日暗 时间: 2013-1-9 07:49:34

1.7

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