Argument53 weixch的，哪位有空，帮忙改改吧，谢谢！

weixchUID: 2104033

53
Thirteen years ago, researchers studied a group of 25 infants who showed signs of mild distress when exposed to unfamiliar stimuli such as an unusual odor or a tape recording of an unknown voice. They discovered that these infants were more likely than other  infants to have been conceived in early autumn, a time when their mothers' production of melatonin—a hormone known to affect some brain functions—would naturally increase in response to decreased daylight. In a follow-up study conducted earlier this year, more than half of these children—now teenagers—who had shown signs of distress identified themselves as shy. Clearly, increased  levels of melatonin before birth cause shyness during infancy and this shyness continues into later life.

论断忽略了一个前提，就是某素是否会导致婴儿害羞。论者没有提供任何对某素的科学研究，以说明某素的功能或是作用是什么。
论据没有说服力,没有提供资料表明婴儿表现出来的敏感,但这与害羞或某素之间没有必然的因果关系,我们不能排除这是因为刺激带来的生理上的不舒服。
论断某素的高含量会导致婴儿害羞，并在后面的生活中延续。但显然性格的形成有很多原因，后天的环境与经历也非常重要。不一定是早期的心理状态造成的

The speaker indicates that shynesss during infancy is due to the high level of melatonin and the shyness would continue into later life. To support this conclusion, it is concerned in the material the 25 infants born in autumn who showed signs of distress when exposed to unknown stimuli and continued to be shy in later life. However, close scrutiny of the statement might show us some flaws undermining the author's deduction.

First of all, the conclusion drawn by speaker is based on the assumption that melatonin could result in shyness. Unfortunately, here comes no evidence to support the supposition. Since the speaker does not provide us more information about the function of melatonin but that it could affect the brain, we could not draw a conclusion arbitrarily that it must give rise to shyness. Moreover, even if it is convincing that mothers' production of that hormone is considerably high in autumn when the infants were conceived, we cannot make sure that the high level of melatonin in mothers' blood would surly lead to high concentrations of that component in the body fluid of embryo; if this is the case, let alone to mention that the shyness of infancy may be attributed to the hormone.

Secondly, the study here concerned by the speaker does not necessarily leads to the conclusion he asserts. As informed by the report, we notice that there are signs of distress happened in these 25 infants when exposed to unfamiliar stimuli. But there is no certain relationship here between the distress and shyness or the causality between the distress and the hormone as implied by the speaker, since we cannot rule out the possibility that the distress may be due to infants' mental or physical reaction to some external stimulus themselves such as unusual odor or unknown voice. If it is true, it may be unconvincing to use the report to prove the causality which does not exist at all.

Finally, the speaker asserts that the shyness during infancy would take effect into their later life. To support his viewpoint, a follow-up study of the children, now teenagers, has mentioned above to show us that the recent shyness is caused by the mental status of infant years. However, the speaker arbitrarily gives the reason of recent shyness without further analysis. Because without consideration of other possible factors which could also give rise to shyness in teenagers, we cannot promise that the recent shyness must be due to the distress in infant age. Consider, for instance, the circumstance or the experience acquired in the course of growing up which could have a great impact on the construction of character.

Thus, to sum up, the speaker's argument is unconvincing as it stands. To make the viewpoint more authentic, the author should show us more information about the function of melatonin, and also clarify the causality between the distress and the hormone. Moreover, to better support the conclusion, it is author's duty to show us more evidence to prove that the mental status in infant age is the main reason of later shyness.