Argument140 第二篇，欢迎狂拍！

zoe797970UID: 2249886

• outline:
  1.summerize the arguer's point view, and point
  out there are many flaws in his/her argument
  2.the popularity of her class can't prove
  that she has a good ability to teach
  3.two years' grant money can't prove her
  teaching abilities or research abilities
  4.there is no evidence for the her leaving
  5.state my view and give some recommendations
  to the arguer
  
  In this report, the arguer asserts that
  the committee should give professor Thomas
  a money-raise and promotion. To bolster
  his/her conclusion, the arguer cites the
  example that the professor's classes are
  the largest in the university, and she has
  brought a lot of grants to the university
  in the past two years. Meanwhile, the author
  also reasons that without a raise and promotion,
  he/she fear that the professor might leave
  for another college. At the first glance, the
  argument appears to be somewhat appealing,
  however, further reflection reveals that
  it suffers from a series of critical fallacies.
  
  Firstly, the arguer's assumption that
  the professor's popularity among students is
  based on the fact that her classes are the
  largest at the university. As we all know,
  there are many specific courses in different
  universities which all of the students studying
  there have to take. For example, I know that
  even in Beijing there are many universities
  may chose some courses for all the students
  according to their own features, such as China
  University of Geosciences requires a course
  which called The Basic Theory of Earth, and
  China University of Technology has a course
  called The Basic Theory of Steel, they are
  both for the entire university. So, without
  considering the condition and background of
  the university, the arguer can't jump to that
  conclusion, perhaps the university happened to
  be one deprived from a college of botany, then
  there would be no doubt that the professor
  could have the largest classes in the university.
  
  Secondly, the fact that professor Thomas attracted
  grant money to the university can't prove
  either her teaching abilities or her research
  skills. Perhaps she just attracted some grants
  in the past two years, and in the other years
  she did not. For that matter, there may be
  many other professors did attract more money
  to the university in total compared with her,
  then it would be unfair to those professors
  for the committee to give professor Thomas
  a raise and promotion.
  
  Thirdly, the argument provides no clear evidence
  that professor Thomas would leave the university
  for another one if the committee didn't raise
  her salary and give her promotion. Lacking
  such evidence, it is absolutely unwise to
  give that conclusion.
  
  To sum up, the conclusion lacks credibility
  in that the evidence cited in the analysis
  does not lend strong support to what the arguer
  claims. To make the argument more convincing,
  the arguer should have to provide more persuasive
  support concerning the specific condition of
  the university and more exact records of professor
  Thomas.
  
  又是花了一个小时才勉强写完的。。。

[ 本帖最后由 zoe797970 于 2007-6-2 13:22 编辑 ]

小破孩UID: 2125288

In this report, the arguer asserts that
the committee should give professor Thomas
a money-raise and promotion. To bolster
his/her conclusion, the arguer cites the
example that the professor's classes are
the largest in the university, and she has
brought a lot of grants to the university
in the past two years. Meanwhile, the author
also reasons that without a raise and promotion,
he/she fear that the professor might leave
for another college. At the first glance, the
argument appears to be somewhat appealing,
however, further reflection reveals that
it suffers from a series of critical fallacies.

Firstly, the arguer's assumption that
the professor's popularity among students is
based on the fact that her classes are the
largest at the university. 似乎感觉直接指出错误更强势一些,不过可能那是个人风格的差异,呵呵
As we all know,
there are many specific courses in different
universities which all of the students studying
there have to take. 这句不知道怎么改,不过既然你知道compulsory cousre了,我就不改了,呵呵For example, I know that
even in Beijing there are many universities
may去掉may? chose some courses for all the students
according to their own features, such as China
University of Geosciences requires a course
which called The Basic Theory of Earth, and
China University of Technology has a course
called The Basic Theory of Steel, they are
both for the entire university.果然三句不离本行,呵呵 So, without
considering the condition and background of
the university, the arguer can't jump to that the
conclusion, 另起一句perhaps the university happened to
be one deprived from a college of botany, then
there would be no doubt that the professor
could have the largest classes in the university.

Secondly, the fact that professor Thomas attracted换个词吧,感觉好像用美色骗钱似的,呵呵
grant money to the university can't prove
either her teaching abilities or her research
skills. Perhaps she just attracted some grants
in the past two years, and in the other years
she did not. For that matter, there may be
many other professors did attract more money
to the university in total compared with her,
then it would be unfair to those professors
for the committee to give professor Thomas
a raise and promotion.用了太多次attract了,有点变化可能会好点

Thirdly, the argument provides no clear evidence
that professor Thomas would leave the university
for another one if the committee didn't raise
her salary and give her promotion. Lacking
such evidence, it is absolutely unwise to
give that conclusion.这段没展开,可以再加东西

To sum up, the conclusion lacks credibility
in that the evidence cited in the analysis
does not lend strong support to what the arguer
claims. To make the argument more convincing,
the arguer should have to provide more persuasive
support concerning the specific condition of
the university and more exact records of professor
Thomas.

呵呵,看你的b3和conclusion差不多,觉得其实body更应该充实一点,语言上可能多一点变化会好吧,不过我自己也是想了半天还是那几个词,加油

zoe797970UID: 2249886

谢谢小破孩！我会加油的，呵呵