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标题: “大洋彼岸之风”xiaoxiaoW备考宣言 [打印本页]
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-24 22:07:20 标题: “大洋彼岸之风”xiaoxiaoW备考宣言
希望可以一次考到自己满意的分数.
目标：1400+4.5
个人格言：是高手，就要耐得住空虚和寂寞。想快乐，想无虚，就别做高手。
备考地：哈尔滨
目前：6级已过
最近1周目标：再过一遍单词
不喜欢拉长战线，喜欢说到做到的感觉，
我的胆子很小，不敢开始写作文。怕受打击。不过越是怕，就越要勇于面对。
作者: juventusland 时间: 2009-5-26 18:19:55
请问您的QQ号？以后要多联系
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-26 21:20:34
大家：分组后第一次作业来了，我是刚下火车，头脑有些不清楚，观点写的有些幼稚无新意。请见谅，我会再优化 @_@
5、"A nation should require all its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college rather than allow schools in different parts of the nation to determine which academic courses to offer."教育类 出现频数：69
我的观点：有保留地支持
开头：现在是个尊重个人独特性的社会，每个人都想创新，每个人都想自己感兴趣的领域打造一片天地，可是，在深入到一定程度的情况下，我们也许会发现，我们的知识面过于狭窄，很难再有突破，也许应该在全国实行课程统一。扩充每个人的知识面。
1．全国统一课程的优点。
（1）TS：当今社会需要的不是：“I”型人才，而是“T”型人才。只有在知识基础牢固的基础上有针对性地在某一领域加以深化，才为社会需要，而统一课程正是“T”的那个横。
（2）从某种程度上来说，统一课程可以方便大学加以人才的选拔。（例子：gre的各类题型）
（3）
2．全国统一课程的缺点。
（1）考虑到全国区域文化和经济的差异性，全国完全一致的课程的实施很难实现。
（2）抑制了学生思维的创新和个人兴趣。
3．总的来说，政府应当设置一些最基本的课程使学生达到最基本的知识和修养水平（如我国的义务教育）以让学生在以后的个人学习中不至于基础薄弱。但是同时也应当考虑到地区和地区之间的经济和文化差异，补充一些考虑区域差异和学生个人兴趣的课程设置。
与本题相关的题目
(1)51. Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.
(2) 106.All students should be required to take at one course in ethics, even if taking the course means a decreased emphasis on academic subjects.
作者: junzii 时间: 2009-5-27 22:04:48
（1）"也许应该在全国实行课程统一。扩充每个人的知识面。"
----我觉得这一点上有点缺陷：实行课程统一不一定就能扩充人知识面，有太多他因。
如果这样说会不会好一点点：全国制定统一课程能够在相当程度上改善落后地区的基础教育，使整个国家的大学前的教育处于基本相同的水平
（2）“当今社会需要的不是：“I”型人才，而是“T”型人才。只有在知识基础牢固的基础上有针对性地在某一领域加以深化，才为社会需要，而统一课程正是“T”的那个横。”
----这点有新意 还可以转折一下：如果在统一制定课程的基础上，不允许地方自行制定课程，有可能抹杀文化及传统的多样性。
我的结尾段的想法和你差不多：）
我也不敢用英文写:dizzy: 呵呵
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-28 00:26:55
4# junzii
谢谢评价哦，你的改法确实实际了许多
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-28 21:50:02
本帖最后由 xiaoxiaoW 于 2009-5-29 00:06 编辑
处女作！
An eaglet hits the azure due to the procedure in which it gets fledged. An athlete jumps higher and further because he ran first. People grow up because of education. No one can deny the fact that a person’s education is the most important aspect of his life. So,should all students in a nation study the same national curriculum be a require until they enter college instead of allowing school in different parts to determine which course to offer?
In my opinion, taking the same curriculum do have benefits to those students who have their own interests and want to be specialized in some area.Fundamental knowledge, social skills, ideology and moral education should be instilled to every student before they enter universities so that students may start at an almost same line, which provide a lot convenience for universities to educate and for college students from different places easier to accost. What more important is that having a good foundation of knowledge contributes to students who want to specialize and be excellent in some areas a tool that connect different disciplines together and be more familiar in other correspondent areas.
It is really a society full of competitions. People of different age andsex who is of such the “
T” type , that is, those who are good at some common disciplines and be excellent in a specific area are needed most.
It is the curriculum they took before or during their lives in universities that makes the “-“of “T”.
While, students do should take the curriculum decided by authority before they enter college, yet , one decided by local schools also allow students to have various technology skills and moralities full of diverse characters, which makes an university more vivid, and a local course made astudent more special and full of his own history.
There are still a lot of problems in accomplishing a general curriculum decided by authority, since the diversity of the whole country does not allow different parts of the nation implementing the systematic curriculum because of various conditions of economy , hardware, and weather. That having a computerscience class may be a dream for those from a poor part which is the same for those in modern cities learn how grains grow.
So, maybe we can make a conclusion that a general curriculum decided by authority rather than by local schools may not only successfully avoid students to be limited to a narrow space of knowledge and be more competitive in interdisciplinary areas, but also mold students a healthy and strong ideology and morality, which is one of the substantial goals of education. A course decided by local schools is also necessary because not all schools can afford the curriculum, not all students can be well educated in a ordinary.
To hit the azure, to jump higher and further. A curriculum including fundamental knowledge connecting interdisciplinary areas decided by authority should comprehend the diversity of different parts of the nation, and assimilate thediversity to make the education more effective and full of sence.
作者: Virtual_Pro 时间: 2009-5-29 19:17:17
本帖最后由 Virtual_Pro 于 2009-5-29 19:29 编辑
修改说明：
提纲的问题楼上有为童鞋已经说的很到位了，我就不多说了。改了下文字的。其中加粗的表示我觉得不妥当的地方，如果没有标注就是要删掉的意思，其他的按标注的解释。鉴于水平所限，改得可能不到位或有错误，望见谅。
An eaglet hits the azure due to the procedure in which it gets fledged. An athlete jumps higher and further because he ran faster first. People grow up because of education.(A Person grows up because of receiving a good education.) No one can deny the fact that a person’s education is the most important aspect of his life.(really? 太绝对化？) （这里我认为有问题，教育与课程的衔接太突兀）So, should all students in a nation study the same national curriculum be a require until they enter college instead of allowing school in different parts to determine which course to offer?
In my opinion, taking the same curriculum do have benefits to（for?） those students who have their own interests and want to be specialized in some area.
（不理解这个逻辑，为什么上同样的课程对于想要成为某方面专家的学生有好处？）Fundamental knowledge, social skills, ideology and moral education should be instilled to every student before they enter universities so that students may start at an almost (the)same line, which provide a lot convenience for universities to educate and for college students from different places easier to accost(get along). What(is?) more important is that having a good foundation of knowledge contributes to(不确定contribute to sb something这样的用法是否正确，没见过这样的用法) students who want to specialize and be excellent in some areas a tool（前面是knowledge，后面是tool能否对应？） that connect different disciplines together and be more familiar in other correspondent areas.
It is really a society full of competitions. People of different age and sex（gender） who is of such the “
T” type , that is, those who are good at some common disciplines and be excellent in a specific area are needed most.
It is the curriculum they took before or during their lives in universities that makes them the type“-“of “T”.
While, students do should take the curriculum decided by authority before they enter college, yet , one(?) decided by local schools also allow students to have various technology skills and moralities full of diverse characters, which makes an university more vivid, and a local course made a student more special and full of his own history.(sry,这段没看懂)
There are still a lot of problems in accomplishing a general curriculum decided by authority, since the diversity of the whole country does not allow(permit?) different parts of the nation implementing(?) the systematic(?) curriculum because of various conditions of economy , hardware, and weather. That having a computer science class may be a dream(?) for those from a poor(undeveloped) part which is the same(is similarly) for those in modern cities (to) learn how grains grow.
So, maybe we can make a conclusion that a general curriculum decided by authority rather than by local schools may not only successfully avoid students to be limited to a narrow space of knowledge and be more competitive in interdisciplinary areas, but also mold(能带双宾?) students a healthy and strong ideology and morality, which(能否用which指代一句话?) is one of the substantial goals of education. A course decided by local schools is also necessary because not all schools can afford the curriculum, not all students can be well educated in a ordinary(?).
To hit the azure, to jump higher and further.(?) A curriculum including fundamental knowledge connecting interdisciplinary areas decided by authority should comprehend the diversity of different parts of the nation, and assimilate the diversity to make the education more effective and full of sence(?).
评分给3分，感觉中间有些地方逻辑比较混乱。此外感觉作者使用了很多不准确的汉译英，弥漫着一股Chinglish的气息。从全文来看，不过作为处女作还是不错的，希望楼主再接再厉。
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-31 13:08:54
我真的不知道备考日志天天记是有好处滴~~从今天起，天天记录下自己的进度吧，也好让大家鞭策刺激我，嗯 从今天交作业开始
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-31 13:28:39
一直不知道备考日志天天写是有好处滴~~
以后一定要坚持天天写 反正现在很闲。
就从交这次的作业开始吧。
单词作业part1
misrepresentation
['mis`reprizen'tei54n]
n.歪曲
stunning
['st8ni6]
a.极富魅力的
swerve
[sw4:v]
v.突然改变方向
thaw
[73:]
v.解冻，溶化
tiff
[tif]
n.吵嘴，呕气
vexation
[vek'sei54n]
n.困扰，苦恼
volley
['v3li]
n.齐发，群射；v.齐发，群射；(足球、网球)截击
clipper
['klip4]
n.大剪刀；快速帆船
cryptic
['kriptik]
a.秘密的，神秘的
creep
[kri:p]
v.匍匐前进；悄悄地移动
elaboration
[i`l1b4'rei54n]
n.详细的细节，详尽阐述
extant
[eks't1nt]
a.现存的，传世的
indemnity
[in'demniti]
n.赔偿；保证
measured
['me94d]
a.精确的；慎重的
obscurity
[4b'skju4riti]
n.费解，不出名
parlance
['p2:l4ns]
n.说法，用语，词汇
patina
['p1tin4]
n.绿锈；光亮的外表
potpourri
[p4u'puri(:)]
n.混杂；杂文集
predecessor
['pri:dises4]
n.前任，前辈；原先的东西
premonition
[`pri:m4'ni54n]
n.预感，预兆
pun
[p8n]
n.双关语
quaint
[kweint]
a.离奇有趣的
reserve
[ri'z4:v]
n.储备(物)，储藏量；缄默，谨慎；v.保留，储备，预订
stamp
[st1mp]
v./n.跺脚；在…上盖印
sturdy
['st4:di]
a.(身体)强健的；结实的
tact
[t1kt]
n.机智；圆滑
tapestry
['t1pistri]
n.挂毯
umpire
['8mpai4]
n.裁判；v.对…进行仲裁
vendetta
[ven'det4]
n.世仇，宿怨
vernacular
[v4'n1kjul4]
n.本国语，地方语
apothecary
[4'p37ik4ri]
n.药剂师
complaisant
[k4m'pleiz4nt]
a.顺从的，讨好的
discombobulate
[`disk8m'b3bjuleit]
v.扰乱，使困惑
extenuate
[iks'tenjueit]
v.掩饰(罪行)，减轻罪过
fulminate
['f8lmineit]
v.猛烈抨击，严厉谴责
hackneyed
['h1knid]
a.陈腐的，平常的
inroad
['inr4ud]
n.突袭；消耗
lounge
[laund9]
v.懒散地斜靠；n.休息室
peremptory
[p4'rempt4ri]
a.不容反抗的；专横的
pucker
['p8k4]
v.起皱；n.皱褶
rakish
['reiki5]
a.潇洒的；放荡的
solicitous
[s4'lisit4s]
a.热切的；挂念的
tantrum
['t1ntr4m]
n.发脾气，发怒
ticklish
['tikli5]
a.怕痒的；易怒的
tyranny
['tir4ni]
n.暴政，专制统治；暴行
aversion
[4'v4:54n]
n.嫌恶，憎恨
charade
[54'r2:d]
n.用动作等表演文字意义的字谜游戏
harangue
[h4'r16]
n.长篇指责性演说
loathe
[l4u0]
v.憎恨，厌恶
obnoxious
[4b'n3k54s]
a.令人不愉快的；可憎的
reprieve
[ri'pri:v]
v.缓刑，暂时解救；n.缓刑，暂时解救
scrappy
['skr1pi]
a.碎片的；好斗的；坚毅的
taxonomist
[t1k's3n4mist]
n.分类学家
thwart
[7w3:t]
v.阻挠，使…受挫
vulgar
['v8lg4]
a.无教养的
apprise
[4'praiz]
v.通知，告诉
felicitous
[fi'lisit4s]
a.(话语等)适当的，得体的
hoary
['h3:ri]
a.(头发)灰白的；古老的
plaintive
['pleintiv]
a.可怜的，伤心的
salute
[s4'lu:t]
v.行举手礼；向…致意；n.敬礼
temerity
[ti'meriti]
n.鲁莽，大胆
verve
[v4:v]
n.(艺术作品的)神韵；(人)生机
chary
['t5A4ri]
a.小心的，审慎的
falter
['f3:lt4]
v.摇晃，蹒跚；支吾地说
hyphen
['haif4n]
n.连字号(即“-”)
inchoate
['ink4ueit]
a.刚开始的；未发展的
obverse
['3bv4:s]
n./a.正面(的)
prophet
['pr3fit]
n.先知，预言家
surmount
[s4'maunt]
v.克服，战胜
toil
[t3il]
v./n.辛苦，辛勤劳作
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-31 17:59:41
本帖最后由 xiaoxiaoW 于 2009-5-31 18:10 编辑
这是eco的分析，第一次做 有些生疏，以后会更加努力！
红色为红宝词汇，绿色为语言表达借鉴，橙色为文章大致思路分析 黄色为自己看法
Don't get too excited about some recent brighter economicnews
IT HAS been a cheerful couple ofdays for those starved of bright economic news. Hopefulstatistics have been trickling in from many parts of the world. OnFriday May 29th revised first quarter GDP figures for America showed that theeconomy there had contracted slightly less than had earlier been reported. Inaddition durable-goods orders in the country rose by the most in 16 months. InJapan, factory output rose by 5.2% in April, the biggest monthly increase, inpercentage terms, in over half a century. And in the first quarter India’seconomy grew by a bullish 5.8%, compared with ayear before, while South Korea’s作者开始例举经济复苏的数字根据 industrialproduction continued to rise in April.
Even in gloomyEurope there are encouragingsigns.
进一步举例Poland’s GDP ticked up by 0.8% in the first quarter, asdid German private consumption (in the same period) and retail sales also grew,by 0.5%, in April. British consumer confidence remained steady in April, andhouse prices there rose both in March and May, according to one index.
For optimists, these are all signs that might pointtowards the beginning of the end of the “Great Recession”（TS）. Headline writers, and those who are urging stockmarkets to continue rising,will continue to talk of hopes of recovery. Yet a closer look at the detail ofthe latest figures suggests that hope springs eternaland will latch on to what it can—even when a more soberanalysis would suggest there is a long way to go before recovery sets in.
Optimists make much of statistics that beat analysts’ expectations. But when a particular figure outdoes predictions it maybe because those expectations were overly pessimistic, rather than a sign thatsomething fundamental has changed for the better. 全文主旨句
What, for instance, is the right reference point on thelatest news on India's economy? Doomsters mightfret that it has grown at the slowest quarterly pace in several years.Cheerleaders could rejoice that it has expanded slightly faster than mostpeople had expected. Weary of negative news, thelatter explanation is a tempting way to make sense of the numbers, but the gloomy view is equally valid.
Consider, too, the figures for consumer confidence in Britain. Althoughconsumer gloom seems to have abated, the reported level of –27 is remarkablylow by historical standards. If one takes into account reports that Britishconsumers had been growing a bit more confident in recent months, the lateststatistic could suggest a halt to a small rally, which is hardly something to cheer. Thisexample highlights the difficulty of extrapolatingfrom a single month or quarter of data, which can easily be skewed by one-off events such as a national holiday orsudden desperate measures by retailers to offload stock. Discerning whether a more sustained recovery might beunder way takes, unsurprisingly, more data.
Thus pessimists, who are unconvinced that the worst isover for the world economy, have much to reinforce their dark mood. One particular concern is that the financial and creditproblems at the root of the global recession have not been dealt withsatisfactorily. KeiichiroKobayashi, a Japanese economist, has looked back to Japan’sexperience in the late 1990s and argues that unless the banks are fixed, astrong recovery for the world economy is impossible. Some disagree, suggestingthat economic output can bounce back even beforecredit and financial markets are again healthy, if consumers get their walletsopen. But even if this argument is compelling in some historical cases, thistime it seems that household spending in many economies will remain weakbecause of high levels of debt.
One man who has made his name in recent years as a doom-monger, Nouriel Roubini,an economist at New York University, recently suggested that recovery fromrecession was far from imminent, arguing that“it's going to last another six to nine months”. It might not be surprisingthat he avoids a bullish prediction, but Mr Roubini goes one step further, noting that other economists are still suggesting a“doomsday” scenario,(这句的成分是什么啊？，没看懂) with continuing contractionfor a long time to come, and thus even he could be considered as an optimist.
the author shows no prejudice in the issue. opinions of optimists are leaded by a serial munbers of those country performs good recently,and then turned to the topic sentense which shows the other possibility of inceresing numbers,and ended up with a conclusion that it may last a another 6 to 8 month to get out of the recession.
作者: 大洋彼岸之风 时间: 2009-5-31 18:06:21
回来啦 顶@！！！！！！！！！！！
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-31 18:11:55
11# 大洋彼岸之风
谢啦，发现你的精力很旺盛啊，要利用好这先天条件，呵呵
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-31 19:23:21
本帖最后由 xiaoxiaoW 于 2009-5-31 19:35 编辑
1、"We can usually learn much more frompeople whose views we share than from people whose views contradict our own;disagreement can cause stress and inhibit learning.
关键词：learning
share
contradict
核心是：contradictingviews 是进步的根源。
1
people 为什么learn (through
education failure contradicting views) to
learn the world better and adapt themselvesto the world better.
2
through
(education failure contradicting views) to
learn
1---指出自身观点的缺陷所在，让人改善自己的观点。地球中心说。
2—得到更加广阔的思路，使自己有更多的选择。
3---是一种思想得以传播和改良的根本
3
share同一种观点，那么share 会使人的自信增加
1—
思想不会再进步，错误不会被发现。
2—
社会的diversity 和multiplicity 丧失
4补：share 会使人的自信增加，但是不利于发现可进步的空间。要使当地坚持自己的观点。对反驳的声音不能盲目地听从，要理性的看待。否则会丧失自己的主见。
5结：是contradictingviews make us learn more.但是我们要理智的看待。
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-31 19:36:27
7、"The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records."总频99 科技类 本提纲学习无夏心经 模仿学习而成。无夏心经很赞！
ISSUE7：
关键词：video camera，accurate，record，life，written
核心是：两者的比较
1人类为什么要“记录”－创作＋传播＋记录史实（创作就是记录人类对自己所理解的世界的表现和表达；传播就是用来让更多的人交换彼此的知识；史实就是记录当时历史传给后代）
2如何满足这样的需求？要求记录的工具必须－可以记录＋可以传播＋可以存储（可记录指的是要有一个介质来承载，传播指的是可以被移动，被携带，存储是可以长期的留存，而不是一会就没了）
4从这三个基本要求出发，对图象记录和文字记录分别进行优劣比较
5比较1－可记录方面，VIDEO可以录声画，完全再现，缺点成本高，拍摄者的主观视角；文字，只有文字，理解时容易误差，然而最广泛的应用，所以各种流派各种思想都会被记录，比较全面客观
6比较2－可传播方面。VIDEO要求要用放映的基本设施，文字作品轻便得多，随时随地可以看
7比较3－可存储方面。拷贝的存储要求一些特定的要求，温度，湿度，等等；书籍就相对简单，而且复制起来也便宜
8除此之外，VIDEO有一个致命的缺点，就是无法表达人内心的思想和一些抽象的东西。而文字是可以表达的。所以无法代替文字，但100年后如何，谁也不知道
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-31 19:47:10
8、"It is often necessary, even desirable, for political leaders to withhold information from the public." 总频69 政治类
关键词：necessary withhold information
核心是：whether doing so benefits the public.
1 political leaders 的职责所在
1---使社会保持一个健康的整体，并积极发展。
2---带给public 最大的利益
（三个代表）
2 public有权利知道information
1---关系到自身的利益。
2—对政府的工作是一种监督
3---官民的思想相结合统一
3 有时候应该 withhold
3— 对社会有害处时。为保证群众的安宁
4— 关系到国家机密。
4结：benefits the public 是核心
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-31 22:00:36
类比issue7
233,Although innovations such as video, computers, and the Internet seem to offer schools improved methods for instructing students, these technologies all too often distract from real .learning.
关键词：innovations，improved methods，instructing，real learning.
核心是：两者的比较、
1 instructing students 什么？ instructing students
1---基本的人生观价值观。
2---基本的生存技能
3---对自身兴趣的开发
2 如何满足学习的要求？要求学习的手段必须－可以交流＋可以反馈＋可以传授（可交流指的是要有一个介质供多人讨论，反馈指的是可以随时检验学习效果，传授是可以接受知识）
1— 交流对比
2— 反馈对比
3— 传授对比
4— 除此之外，innovations 有一个致命的缺点，就是学生无法感受到真正直观学习的触感，质感，和与人交流的锻炼 而real是可以表达的。所以无法代替real learning，但100年后如何，谁也不知道
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-31 22:29:10
类比1
122.We owe almost all our knowledge not to people who agreed, but to people who have disagreed.
关键词：agreed disagreed
核心是：contradicting views 是进步的根源。
1 人们学习知识的目的
1— 认识世界
2— 适应这个世界
2 through (education failure contradicting views) to learn
1---指出自身观点的缺陷所在，让人从不同的角度改善自己的观点。地球中心说。
2—得到更加广阔的思路，使自己有更多的选择。
3---是一种思想得以传播和改良的根本
3 agree同一种观点，那么agree 会使人的自信增加
3— 可以完善已有的观念。
4— 一味地agree会导致多样性的失去，知识面狭窄，片面。
反驳的声音不能盲目地听从，要理性的看待。否则会丧失自己的主见。
5结：无论是支持的还是反对的，我们要理智的看待，虚心接受。
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-5-31 22:55:36
类比8
202 Unlike great thinkers and great artist, the most effective political leaders must often yield to public opinion and abandon principle or the sake of compromise.
关键词：effective abandon principle
核心是：领导者怎样做才是有效？.
1 political leaders 的职责所在
1---使社会保持一个健康的整体，并积极发展。
2---带给public 最大的利益
（三个代表）
2 great thinkers and great artists do not have to appeal to the opinions of the public.
3 for politic leaders, winning the favor of the public is the key to effective leadership.
1— 获得民心才能更进一步的统领人民。
2— 领导人有时候不能体会民众的生活 就要以民众的呼声来做决定，真正以人民为根本
4 如：但是民众的知识面有限 在民众收蛊惑时要带领人民走出愚昧。
5总结 总的来说，领导人的决定应该一切以人民的利益为第一位考虑，根据人民的利益来决定是否abandon principle
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-6-1 18:00:17
本帖最后由 xiaoxiaoW 于 2009-6-7 23:12 编辑
8、"It is often necessary, even desirable, for political leaders to withhold information from the public." 总频69 政治类
关键词：necessary withhold information
核心是：whether doing so benefits the public.
1 political leaders 的职责所在
1---使社会保持一个健康的整体，并积极发展。
2---带给public 最大的利益
（三个代表）
2 public有权利知道information
1---关系到自身的利益。
2—对政府的工作是一种监督
3---官民的思想相结合统一
3 有时候应该 withhold
3— 对社会有害处时。为保证群众的安宁
4— 关系到国家机密。
4结：benefits the public 是核心
Political leaders are those guys people vote to for the sake of the ability and possibility they have to promote the development of the society. They are powerful, yet the very reason they are chosen is that they have the responsibility to bring to the public a better and more stable life.
So, what is a better life like? That having a stable life without wars, a perspective view of the possibility of future is some kind of a better life. Political leaders should keep the public informed with the latest and significant news and methods the authority take in some condition to consolidate the public and the society together, so that the public can act as an union which leads to not only a stabilized society, but also a better economy and political circumstance for both native authority and other countries. Only thus can political leaders do their best to cater the public.
What mentioned above leads to the fact that sometimes the public should keep being informed, which can be proved by the following 3 points. First of all, as the most important part of the society, the public are directly influenced by every method the authority take, so the public deserve to know the information that relates to their lives. In addition, political leaders are so powerful because they are in charge of almost all aspects of the society so that there is a great possibility for those leaders whose characteristics are skewed to make profits for themselves instead of doing their best for the public, if so, it is definitely wrong for the authority to withhold information from the public, as a fact, the public plays an important role in supervising the political leaders doing their jobs. Finally, keeping the public informed is a significant method to help political leaders to make the right decision, since if the authority makes a decision which happen to differs from the hope of public, keeping the public makes a timely response.
While the public should not be informed under every circumstance, especially when they are agitated. It is necessary, even desirable for political leaders to withhold information from public if the information should be confidential and relates to the safety of the whole country. Considering the great number of the residents, it is impossible to secrete an important information, so to withhold it from the public is the appropriate choice. And some information may leads to the panic of the society, if so, political leaders should also withhold information to avoid an agitated and panic society.
So , with the summary of those opinions I mentioned above, we can find that the pith of this issue is that whether political leaders make the society better for the public, people have the right to know the truth so sometimes political leaders should keep the public informed with the information of the authority, yet for the stability of the society, for a better life, sometimes political leaders should withhold information from the public, which benefits the public at some points.
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-6-3 21:04:13
哎呀 昨天网断了 今天来补上
昨天的效果不是很好 大概是因为太闲了就诈骗记不起来的缘故
看了500多个单词
做了一篇eco
其余都没做……
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-6-3 21:05:04
接下来是今天的了
今天还是沉浸在极度的悠闲中
不过终于过了2000个单词
开始背诵范文、
z做eco
作者: juventusland 时间: 2009-6-4 12:47:21
本帖最后由 juventusland 于 2009-6-4 13:47 编辑
Political leaders are those guys people vote to for the sake of the ability and possibility they have to promote the development of the society（这句感觉有点问题，SAKE是LEADERS的行为还能看出来，但ability和possibility是什么？是否要说明下。后面的they have to promote the development of the society是句完整句子，但却不知道修饰了哪里的成分。句子过长表达上有时表达不，这里建议用短句连接）. They are powerful, yet the very reason they are chosen is that they have the responsibility to bring to the public a better and more stable life（bring to public?being 什么呢？有bring sth to sb 的结构，这样可以理解成把他们有的责任带给公众好的生活，觉得意思不是很通顺，我知道你的意思是这种责任的内容是带来好的生活，但我找网络找不到直接用bring to sb的结构）.
So, what is a better life like? That having a stable life without wars, a perspective view of the possibility of future is some kind of a better life（这里说了什么也是BETTER LIFE，但前面提出的问题是better life 是什么啊，改下结构把）. Political leaders should keep the public informed with the latest and significant news and methods the authority take in some condition(什么特定条件？） to consolidate the public and the society together, so that the public can act as an union which leads to not only a stabilized society, but also a better economy（economical) and political circumstance for both native authority and other countries. Only thus can political leaders do their best to cater(cater for) the public.
What mentioned above leads to the fact that sometimes the public should keep being informed, which can be proved by the following 3 points（如果这是一个需要用3点证明的已经导出的事实，好像有点问题。还是理解成要证明上面提出的可以leads to it？）. First of all, as the most important part of the society, the public are directly influenced by every method the authority take, so the public deserve to know the information that relates to their lives. Second of all（用句太CHINESE，可以考虑变换结构）, political leaders are so powerful because they are in charge of almost all aspects of the society so that there is a great possibility for those leaders whose characteristics are skewed to make profits for themselves instead of doing their best for the public, if so, it is definitely wrong for the authority to withhold information from the public, as a fact, the public plays an important role in supervising the political leaders doing their jobs（这里表达的是一些不称职的政治家为自己谋取利益，而人民在监督中起重要作用，因此隐瞒信息不对。总觉得有点问题。i你最后是要看能否提高人民生活为最终目的，在这里应该阐述这种不称执政家隐瞒信息带来的危害。） Third of all, keeping the public informed is a significant method to help political leaders to make the right decision, since if the authority makes a decision which happen to differs from the hope of public, keeping the public makes a timely response.（这句没明白，为什么这样能让leaders做出正确决定？是因为当autority做出有悖于人民愿望的决定时，能得到及时回应吗？那还是做出了错误决定。）我建议作者重新理一下=思路，把这一段重新整理一下。
While the public should not be informed under every circumstance, especially when they are agitated. It is necessary, even desirable for political leaders to withhold information from public（重申题目论点？） if the information should be confidential and relates to the safety of the whole country（关系到国家安全就要隐瞒，这个不一定吧。而且什么情况的信息应该被隐藏下面也没说明）. Considering the great number of the residents, it is impossible to secrete an important information（信息不可数）, so to withhold it from the public is the appropriate choice（人太多隐藏重要信息是不可能的，所以对公众隐藏信息是一个合适的选择。。。想表达的意思矛盾啊，secrete只有分泌和隐藏的意思吧）. And some information may leads to the panic of the society(这里比较空，举些例子建议）, if so, political leaders should also withhold information to avoid an agitated and panic society.（感觉这段的论证可以再精简一些，然后再加上具体事例。可能是xiaowang同学怕字不够么？）
So , with the summary of those opinions I mentioned above, we can find that the pith of this issue is that whether political leaders make the society better for the public（你前面论证了让人们保持了解信息，是可以让人们生活更好，然后又说有时候隐瞒信息是必要的。这些结论不能得出whether political leaders make the society better for the public这样大的结论吧。。再说吧，如果leader都不能把社会搞好了，那谈这个意义也不是很大了）, people have the right to know the truth so sometimes political leaders should keep the public informed with the information of the authority, yet for the stability of the society, for a better life, sometimes political leaders should withhold information from the public, which benefits the public at some points（意思是在一些方面？在什么方面啊.，前面好像没有提到）
第一次改作文随便说点吧，首先我承认自己作文水平不算好，那么改作文也并不能完美，提出来的意见如有问题希望XIAOWANG与我共同讨论。。。我对这篇作业的意见呢就是。论证不够紧密，比较空泛，缺乏实际例子。而且好像在几个地方存在矛盾。当然我也觉得和这篇文章不好写有关，政治性题材对于我们来说发挥的难度更大点吧。。。然后还有个建议是，建议一开始写作文还是尽量别用太长的句子，因为容易出错。一开始先要培养写ISSUE的思路和论证思想的逻辑性，熟练之后再开始更注重句式，像现在你写的长句子我不敢多改，但还是觉得有问题的，读起来也不容易理解。。。
分数给3分吧，总体感觉就是论证比较空，逻辑性不够。语法句式上还好（我的大问题）。。大家都从摸黑起步，话说我的写作也是摸索阶段呢。。。一起加油吧。
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-6-7 22:57:02
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-962648-1-1.html
同主题写作第一期
作者: Virtual_Pro 时间: 2009-6-8 21:52:58 标题: Virtual_Pro对issue8的修改
Political leaders are those guys（非正式用语，不适合出现在g中，替换成who） people vote to（没有vote to sb. 的用法） for the sake of the ability and possibility they have to promote the development of the society. They are powerful, yet（并列关系为什么要用yet来连接） the very reason they are chosen is that they have the responsibility to bring to the public a better and more stable life.
（首段并没有给出关于题目的观点，只是引出了political leaders的概念，似乎不是一个好的论证开头。不过这只是个人理解，你可以保留自己的观点）
So, what is a better life like? That having a stable life without wars, a perspective view of the possibility of future is some kind of a better life. Political leaders should keep the public informed with the latest and significant news and methods the authority take in some condition to consolidate the public and the society together,（感觉太长了，这里是否可以断开。 so that the public can act as an union which leads to not only a stabilized society, but also a better economy and political circumstance for both native authority and other countries. Only thus can political leaders do their best to cater the public.
（此段论证一个好的领导人是什么样子的，感觉还是没进入正题啊，我都急死了……）
What mentioned above leads to the fact that sometimes the public should keep being informed, which can be proved by the following 3 points. First of all, as the most important part of the society, the public are directly influenced by every method the authority take（之前用过，原样重复不太好，建议改写）, so the public deserve to know the information that relates to their lives. In addition, political leaders are so powerful because they are in charge of almost all aspects of the society so that there is a great possibility for those leaders whose characteristics are skewed to make profits for themselves instead of doing their best for the public, （太长了，读着一口气都喘不上来……）if so, it is definitely wrong for the authority to withhold information from the public, as a fact, the public plays an important role in supervising the political leaders doing their jobs. Finally, keeping the public informed is a significant method to help political leaders to make the right decision, since if the authority makes a decision which happen to differs from the hope of public, keeping the public makes a timely response.
（感觉三点论证都没有展开，不充分的感觉，个人觉得，这是之前开头入题太慢的后遗症）
While the public should not be informed under（这个介词不正确吧） every（每一个？） circumstance, especially when they are agitated. It is necessary, even desirable for political leaders to withhold information from public if the information should be confidential and relates to the safety of the whole country. Considering the great number of the residents, it is impossible to secrete an important information, so to withhold it from the public is the appropriate choice. And some information may leads to the panic of the society, if so, political leaders should also withhold information to avoid an agitated and panic society.
（之前我也是这样的写法，N多个原因，每个提到一点。后来看范文，发现好的写法是写1到2个原因，每个论述清楚。我觉得这样比较好。供你参考。）
So（Therefore） , with the（去掉？） summary（sum） of those opinions I mentioned above, we can find that the pith of this issue is that whether political leaders make the society better for the public, people have the right to know the truth so sometimes political leaders should keep the public informed with the information of the authority, yet for the stability of the society, for a better life, sometimes political leaders should withhold information from the public, which benefits the public at some points.
鉴于之前juventusland同学仔细改过词句，我就从结构上入手，提供一些修改意见。总体感觉还是论证的框架没有架构好，内容有失衡的嫌疑。如同J同学所说，我们都处于摸黑阶段，所以问题多多也是正常的。现在的不好才是我们要奋斗的原因，才是我们去努力的意义，这样才最有成功的喜悦。用这句话勉励自己，也希望与你们共勉。
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-6-8 22:07:19
24# Virtual_Pro
嗯 多谢组长和副组长的点评
发现好的写法是写1到2个原因，每个论述清楚
要试试
开头慢确实是我的弱项
现在对于issue的结构还处于摸索阶段 但我会一点一点学会一个好的论证框架是什么样子的
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-6-8 23:44:40
0910AW 同主题写作第二期 ARGUMENT173 by xiaoxiaoW
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-963532-1-1.html
作者: xiaoxiaoW 时间: 2009-6-16 23:55:39
同主题写作第四期
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=971211&extra=
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