ARGUMENT145【0706G－cheer作文互改小组第十三次作业】

flyyuhaoUID: 2248478

145.A new study collected data that shows that people who snore are more likely to gain weight than are people who do not snore. It is well known that many people who snore also stop breathing frequently during the night for a few seconds, a condition called sleep apnea. The interruption of breathing wakes the person-often so briefly that the waking goes unnoticed-and can leave the person too tired during the day to exercise. Anyone who snores, therefore, should try to eat less than the average person and to exercise more.
一项新的调查所收集的数据显示打呼噜的人比不打呼噜的人更容易长胖。我们知道很多打呼噜的人夜间也经常有数秒钟的呼吸停顿，这种现象被称为睡眠呼吸中断。这种呼吸的停顿导致本人醒来--通常十分短暂以至于不被察觉--并且会使本人在白天很累而无力锻炼。因此，所有打呼噜的人都应该比正常人少吃多锻炼。


提纲：
1.调查没有给出具体的数据,统计资料,表明作者的论断,由可能存在其他因素,不同地区的人,生活习惯不同等.
2.作者得出论断的前提:大呼噜的人白天会很累而无力锻炼导致身体长胖.长胖可以由其他因素产生.
3.少吃多锻炼能否抑制长胖也值得怀疑.而且其论据本身也不科学,打鼾已经使身体虚弱,少吃多锻炼缺乏科学性.
4.作者忽略了其他可能的途径来不长胖.

实验对照组


TOPIC: ARGUMENT145 - A new study collected data that shows that people who snore are more likely to gain weight than are people who do not snore. It is well known that many people who snore also stop breathing frequently during the night for a few seconds, a condition called sleep apnea. The interruption of breathing wakes the person-often so briefly that the waking goes unnoticed-and can leave the person too tired during the day to exercise. Anyone who snores, therefore, should try to eat less than the average person and to exercise more.
WORDS: 412          TIME: 0:30:00          DATE: 2007-3-5

Before the arguer concludes that there involve a correlation between snoring and getting weight and recommendate that anyone who sores shoule eat less and exercise more, he or she should reconsider his demonstration. This argument is based on some un-proved assmptions, which make it not as convincing as it stands.

To begin with, the arguer unnecessarily establish a relationship between snoring and getting weight without any compelling reasons. His illustration is based on that people who snore at night must have sleep apnea, which may make them too tired to do any exercise in the day time. However, no trustable and scientific supports are available in this argument. We concede that people who have sleep apena at night might fee tired in the day time, but this does not concludes that they do not take any exercise. We can not rule out the possibility that these people do take exercise even when they feel tired, just for keeping them healthy.

Furthermore, the study mentioned in the argument is not persuasive, also. Neither scientific research background and method nor the information upon the people who are invertigated is mentioned. Besides, the study is also vague in some key words for lacking some detailed statistics. The word 'many', for instance, obviously shows that it is an uncertain study: how many people did the study investigate is not talked about. If in the case that the study only researched a little number of people, we have to raise our doubt on the reliability of this study.

Before I come to my conclusion, it is necessary to point out another flaw that weakens the logic of this argument that it is dubious whether it is effective to eat less and exercise more on the purpose of keep weight. If people have already been very tired because of snoring at night, to do exercise in day may have great possibility to exaggreate their physical situation.  The argument fails to take other ways that may keep people away from getting weight, such as a balanced diet and cheerful environment, into account. Unless the speaker have considered all these possibile factors, he cannot draw his conclusion.

In sum, the argument is based on certain un-detailed assumptions. To better evaluate this argument, the author need to provide us with more information to convince us that is relationship between snoring and getting weight is trustable. Furthermore, he or she need to do more research work to make the study more reliable.