[习作点评] 求GRE作文点评，真心！快考试了,想哭 [复制链接]

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电梯直达

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发表于 2015-7-9 19:42:06 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

各位大神，小弟习作一篇，求大神不吝赐教！感激万分
6) A nation should require all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.
观点：
1：有助于公平
2：未考虑到每个人的兴趣所在
3：不是所有人都上大学，因此要考虑其不上大学的人的职业发展
The statement indicates that until all the students enter college, a nation should requirethem to study the same national curriculum. Conceding that studying the same curriculum in different areas would be beneficial for the equality of the education, however, the further analysis makes me disagree with the statement above.
   It is true that  requiring all the students to study the same national curriculum would benefit for the overall equality of the nation. The economic conditions in different religions is of great variety, while without the same national curriculum, the religions who are rich and whould get better education resources  than those who are poor in economy and education. However, if the same national curriculum are impelemnted, all the students would obtain the same opportunity to learn the basic knowledge needed to be eligible to be a fresher in collge.
   Nonetheless, blindly conforming to the requirments of the same curriculum without considering the different characteristics of the individuals will be, to some extent, harmful for the caltivation of the innovation and block their way to find where their interest lies. The unified Take the edcation condition in America as an outstanding example.  In America, the curriculum varis a lot in diffrenets states and  the choices of the  curriculum  in differents are base on not only the fundamental subjects but also the affection and interests of the students.
   Furthermore, not all the students would likely to enter the college, thus choosing the appropriate curriculum depending their future jobs is of extreme importance. For example,  if a a student would prefer to be an actor or artist, the the curriculum designed to  improve one's sensitivity to beauty is superior to the mechanical one, while, choosing the physics or structure (30mins here) subjects is more suitable for the students who’s dream is to become an engineer after high school.
From the above, although studying the same curriculum nationwide would be beneficial for the equality of the education, however, without taking into account the interests and the future development of the individuals, a unified national curriculum would provide nothing but some dreary and inflexible knowledge, and it would be of no good to the cultivation of the versatile elites.

supporting, describe, examples, national, position