[a习作temp] argue4:麻烦大家了。球拍，必回 [复制链接]

rachelwang712
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电梯直达

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发表于 2010-2-22 10:25:29 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

4The following was posted on an Internet real estate discussion site.

"Of the two leading real estate firms in our town—Adams Realty and Fitch Realty—Adams is clearly superior. Adams has 40 real estate agents. In contrast, Fitch has 25, many of whom work only part-time. Moreover, Adams' revenue last year was twice as high as that of Fitch, and included home sales that averaged $168,000, compared to Fitch's $144,000. Homes listed with Adams sell faster as well: ten years ago, I listed my home with Fitch and it took more than four months to sell; last year, when I sold another home, I listed it with Adams, and it took only one month. Thus, if you want to sell your home quickly and at a good price, you should use Adams."

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提纲：
1人数多并不意味着人员的能力高
2平均价格的高低并不意味着F没有能力卖出过好价格，相反，可能原价不同
3时间快慢可能是因为整个行业的情况

After reading the post, I cannot help casting doubts on the conclusion it reaches. The arguer isn't cogent enough in maintaining Adams is better based on the facts he provides. To convince his readers, he needs more inspection into the disparity in performance of the two estate companies.

To begin with, a larger number of agents shall never warrant a better qualified staff, let alone part-time or full time. When it comes to evaluation of employers, it is ability rather than amount that counts. Chances are that Fitch may be featured by highly-qualified staff, enthusiatic about their job, and although some may work part-time, they are outstandingly effecient in working hours, while by contrast, agents in Adams, despite their greater number and longer working time, waste most of their office hours chatting or doing their own personal business, and when asked to do their job, they behave much worse than their counterparts in Fitch. So the aruguer is expected to showcase the difference in the quality not the quantity of staff in the two firms.

Furthermore, a higher average housing price does not necessarily mean consumers should use Adams if they want to sell their home because nothing is mentioned about the situation of the houses sold in the post. What if Adams is selling houses with a value of $1,000,000 while Fitch, $100,000? Apparently, if that is the case, Adams is performing poorly since the houses it sells actully loses its values and Fitch can be a better choice.

The arguer also refers to his personal experience as example but it will not support his idea unless several things below are discussed, namely, the different overall real estate industry performance both 10 years from now and last year; whether his listed home last year itself commands remarkable edge over the one 10 years ago and such. In fact, a lot of reasons other than the real estate agency itself count for the time to sell a house. It can be the industry is suffering from economic downturn where almost every house is hard to sell. It is possible, too that the house in downtown area sells much quicker than the one in less developed region and so is the arguer's home last year, which itself is much better than the one he sold a decade ago. Therefore, the judgment based on this can be overthrown easily.

In conclusion, the recommendation in the post that people should list their home in Adams instead of Fitch calls for more supportive details while the ones mentioned already are too weak. To be exact, people who read the post should be alarm that this might be posted by an agent in Adams; that is to say, an advertisement in its nature.

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ningbo1990
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沙发

发表于 2010-2-22 12:37:20 |只看该作者

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提纲：
1人数多并不意味着人员的能力高
2平均价格的高低并不意味着F没有能力卖出过好价格，相反，可能原价不同 (我对平均价格的理解是，平均价格的高不代表他能帮我们卖价格高。总体不等于个体。)
3时间快慢可能是因为整个行业的情况（我对时间的理解是，10年前不能和去年情况比。）

After reading the post, I cannot help casting doubts on the conclusion it reaches. The arguer isn't cogent enough in maintaining Adams is better based on the facts he provides. To convince his readers, he needs more inspection into the disparity in performance of the two estate companies.

To begin with, a larger number of agents shall never warrant a better qualified staff, let alone part-time or full time. When it comes to evaluation of employers, it is ability rather than amount that counts. Chances are that Fitch may be featured by highly-qualified staff, enthusiatic about their job, and although some may work part-time, they are outstandingly efficient in working hours, while by contrast, agents in Adams, despite their greater number and longer working time, waste most of their office hours chatting or doing their own personal business, and when asked to do their job, they behave much worse than their counterparts in Fitch. So the aruguer is expected to showcase the difference in the quality not the quantity of staff in the two firms.(这篇是argu，语言要严谨，否则就被argu了，所以最好要在列出可能性的时候加上may等这样词语。)

Furthermore, a higher average housing price does not necessarily mean consumers should use Adams if they want to sell their home because nothing is mentioned about the situation of the houses sold in the post. What if Adams is selling houses with a value of $1,000,000 while Fitch, $100,000? Apparently, if that is the case, Adams is performing poorly since the house it sells actually loses its values and Fitch can be a better choice.

The arguer also refers to his personal experience as example but it will not support his idea unless several things below are discussed, namely, the different overall real estate industry performance both 10 years from now and last year; whether his listed home last year itself commands remarkable edge over the one 10 years ago and such. In fact, a lot of reasons other than the real estate agency itself count for the time to sell a house. It can be the industry is suffering from economic downturn where almost every house is hard to sell. It is possible, too that the house in downtown area sells much quicker than the one in less developed region and so is the arguer's home last year, which itself is much better than the one he sold a decade ago. Therefore, the judgment based on this can be overthrown easily.

In conclusion, the recommendation in the post that people should list their home in Adams instead of Fitch calls for more supportive details while the ones mentioned already are too weak. To be exact, people who read the post should be alarm that this might be posted by an agent in Adams; that is to say, an advertisement in its nature.

语法我能力有限没有发现错误，但是错别字有，所以最好以后注意下。
举情况的时候最好用Maybe等词。