[a习作temp] 第一次的argument,11,王大小牛们帮忙拍一下就，不胜感激！ [复制链接]

lizlee0420
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电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2012-3-3 10:16:15 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

说maple县发展限制了农业用地，要限制新房供应怕房价猛涨的那个，对比了另外两个县十年前和十五年前同样的政策

Merely based on the senseless reasoning,the author hastily makes the false and misleading conclusion that the proposed measure of limiting the supply of new housing will result in a significant increase in housing prices in Maple County.The author makes such egregious mistakes such as cause and effect,false analogy and insufficient statistical investigations and analysis.

First of all,the author commits the "cause and effect"wrongness.It's assertive for the author to draw the conclusion that limiting the supply of new housing will inevitably result in a significant increase in housing prices.Nevertheless,other relevant grounds might influence the housing price as well,say, the inflation, the general economic tendency and the population.If there is certain evidence that Maple County will suffer a crisis,a economy depression in the future,with many dwellers emigrating to other place,then the demand on new housing,accordingly,will not necessarily be high,therefor leading the price of new housing to decrease on the contrary.Moreover,it's highly possible that the aforesaid reason has nothing to do with the alleged result.

In addition,the proponents and opponents of the proposed measure both make the conclusion by falsely making the irrational analogy between the state of housing price in Chestnut and Pine County and that of the Maple County ,ignoring the gaps of various situations between them such as size,population,local economic policy made by governors and the general economic tendency.Besides,even though it may prove true that the two counties bear enough resemblance to Maple County to compare,it's taken for granted that Chestnut County remained unchanged over the past ten years,and Pine County the past fifteen years.Due to the variances as size and development,the scenario now could be far different from that time.

What's more,there is a severe weakness in the statistical investigation. The amount of the sample may be not adequate enough to support the analyses.It's highly possible that they investigated 1000 houses,however the entire investigation is around 10000.And the vaguely usage of "modestly"and"significant"is too subjective to insinuate a large number of the sample,maybe the increase in Chestnut County is modest compared with that in the Pine County,but relatively significant when compared with itself.

To sum up,the conclusion reached in the argument lacks tenability since the evidence cited in the analysis does not lend strong support to what the author claims.To make the argument more compelling,the author should provide more information concerning representative statistical evidence.To better evaluate the argument,we need more convincing evidence that the significant increase on house price mainly due to limiting the supply of new housing.

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lizlee0420
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沙发

发表于 2012-3-3 10:19:03 |只看该作者

有点语无伦次，题目都打错了望大小牛们拍一下
另外就是发了好几个帖子，很有加入作文小组互改作文的愿望，实在的说我觉得自己水平还行，但是一直没有回帖……不知道该怎么办了
真心求互改~~~~~~~

【2025FALL】全站祈福已开放~~来领祈福章，求offer得offer

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yayunparty
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板凳

发表于 2012-3-21 17:31:25 |只看该作者

2# lizlee0420

楼主，您好！
这个题的要求是Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

我看您写的应该是按照老G的argu写的吧？！
当然，我刚开始看argu，对题目要求也没怎么掌握，而且我还没动手写过呢。

下面是我从论坛下载的一个关于审题的资料，您看一下；（忘了原帖在哪了，引用一下）：
3、Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
解读：讨论问题+答案+答案如何影响对于论证的评价（可以讨论假设是否有效--Assumption、是否存在额外证据--Evidence、其它解释是否可能--Explanation ...）
question（疑问）

对于给出的建议，是否考量了各个论据的方方面面
对于未考量的方面的质疑，是否会左右建议

开头：However, the reasoning presented by the author is rife with fallacies and certain critical questions need to be answered to decide whether the recommendation would lead to the desired result.
中间：The first question that requires elucidation is whether such a claim is based on sound and convincing evidence.
One obvious question that needs elucidation is whether…

The next question is whether…/This raises the question whether
对整体影响：Therefore, unless clear results from… are given, the claim that… is unjustifiable.

If it cannot be demonstrated that… the reasoning of the argument is notably undermined.
To effectively corroborate the argument, the author may have to provide complete and convincing statistics that show…
结尾：Additional questions would require elucidation before one could comprehensively evaluate author's recommendation.

不知道怎么样？

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