[i习作temp] Issue37 关于竞争的，感觉没什么话好说，有拍必复留链接！ [复制链接]

kolu_ren
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电梯直达

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发表于 2005-7-28 20:57:12 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

In most societies, competition generally has more of a negative than a positive effect.

我的观点是竞争其积极的方面更多。
B1. 竞争对于国家的好处
B2. 竞争对于技术上的好处
B3. 竞争对于个人的好处

Some people believe that competition, in most societies, has more of a negative than a positive effect. Is it true? In my view, the fact is on the contrary, but before we get to a conclusion that competition brings us more benefits than its disadvantage, we should scrutinize on this subject carefully. I present my reason in three sections.

First of all, rivaling enhance the development. We live in an information society with tremendous technological change, updating knowledge and explosion of data from all fields. Each nation tries to raise its comprehensive levels, such as economic, science and technology and military. In order to pursuit this aim, they should pay gorgeous attention to the tendency of world development. For example, Silicon Valley once the homeland of semi-conductor and electronic industry now was taken the place by its energetic competitors----India and China. Especially India, who has removed its poverty by taking part in technological rivaling, appeals the world’s focus for its low cost and mature manufactory. From this point, India is the temporary winner in the competition of this field.

As mentioned, science and technology has become one of the most competitive factors in the present-society. The growing demand for better quality of life and curiosity about the fields unexplored spurs the competition in science. America launched the Discovery shutter recently in the Kennedy Space Center after 2003 Columbia disaster, which cannot impede the stride of scientists. Since some organizations sponsored by nations devote their efforts and funds to astronomy in hope to share an equal position in this field.

Similarly, as a member of society, what is inevitable is each person should attend competition. Under such circumstance, further study after graduation to keep competition becomes a routine task for our daily life. These learning focus on not only our major but also in the fields of other areas. Through learning we broaden our horizon and develop our interests. In a multi- society, well-round knowledge persons—generalists are popular with employers.

Admittedly, harsh competition also leads to a successive of unexpected----unjust competition, cheating and so on. It requires that we should have the right to tell the truth from wrong and complete a moral standard. In sum, competition provides us more advantages.

[ Last edited by staralways on 2005-7-29 at 00:16 ]

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Gladysry
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沙发

发表于 2005-7-28 23:01:26 |只看该作者

我先占个座儿，明天再改。

但是看了你的提纲，觉得你整篇都在写好处。估计对于好处和坏处之间的对比基本给扔了，更好的方法是：
1，对国家的好处多于坏处；2对技术的~~~3，~~~
以此类推。再总结。会更有说服力。

个人意见，明天会详细看的。你如果觉得有道理，想先改一下也可以，赫赫~

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dinddind2003
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板凳

发表于 2005-7-29 00:40:20 |只看该作者

我先改一下,因为没的挑了,欢迎2楼再改,我也可以学习一下

I 37关于竞争的，感觉没什么话好说，有拍必复留链接！

In most societies, competition generally has more of a negative than a positive effect.

我的观点是竞争其积极的方面更多。
B1. 竞争对于国家的好处
B2. 竞争对于技术上的好处
B3. 竞争对于个人的好处

Some people believe that competition, in most societies, has more of a negative than a positive effect. Is it true? In my view, the fact is on the contrary, but before we get to a conclusion that competition brings us more benefits than its disadvantage, we should scrutinize on this subject carefully. I present my reason in three sections.(你是不是也上过新东方啊,这个开头是设问开头，挺熟悉的，感觉不错)

First of all, rivaling enhance the development.（似乎可以说the development of the country这样点题） We live in an information society with tremendous technological change, updating knowledge and explosion of data from all fields. Each nation tries to raise its comprehensive levels（comprehensive levels是什么意思啊，综合国力？是Comprehensive national strength）, such as economic, science and （and 改逗号吧）technology and military. In order to pursuit this aim, they should pay gorgeous attention to the tendency of world development. For example, Silicon Valley once the homeland of semi-conductor and electronic industry now was taken the place by its energetic competitors----India and China. Especially India, who has removed its poverty by taking part in technological rivaling, appeals the world’s focus for its low cost and mature manufactory. From this point, India is the temporary winner in the competition of this field.（可不可以解释一下哪里可以看出竞争的作用？好象只是在讲国家需要发展，举的例子好象只是说了一个事实，没感觉有什么作用）

As mentioned, science and technology has become one of the most competitive factors in the present-society. The growing demand for better quality of life and curiosity about the fields unexplored spurs the competition in science. America launched the Discovery shutter recently in the Kennedy Space Center after 2003 Columbia disaster, which cannot impede the stride of scientists（这句话的主干是America launched the Discovery shutter，可你的意思应该不是强调这个，我想可以改成That America launching the Discovery shutter recently in the Kennedy Space Center after 2003 Columbia disaster cannot impede the stride of scientists）. Since some organizations sponsored by nations devote their efforts and funds to astronomy in hope to share an equal position in this field.（开头点一下这段主题比较好,而且这一段只是有人们要进步的意思，没有看出竞争对技术的作用啊，你可以举例通过什么竞争技术进步了，比如航天，军事，医学等等）
Similarly, as a member of society, what is inevitable is each person should attend competition. Under such circumstance, further study after graduation to keep competition becomes a routine task for our daily life. These learning focus on not only our major but also in the fields of other areas. Through learning we broaden our horizon and develop our interests. In a multi- society, well-round knowledge persons—generalists are popular with employers.（你只是点了一下竞争对个人的作用，大段在写竞争的必然性，是不是主次不分啊？可以写竞争提高了人们的那些素质，以及为什么能提高这些素质）

Admittedly, harsh competition also leads to a successive of unexpected----unjust competition, cheating and so on. It requires that we should have the right to tell the truth from wrong and complete a moral standard. In sum, competition provides us more advantages. （二楼说的没错可以对比一下坏处，比如战争等等，感觉你的论述不够，说服不了我啊）

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