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[未归类] issue196 同主题7，互拍，留链接，必回。 [复制链接]

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电梯直达

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发表于 2006-2-23 07:39:06 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

Issue196
“Technology creates more problems than it solves, and may threaten or damage the quality of life”
翻译：科学技术产生了许多不能解决的问题，对人们的生活质量构成威胁

1:科学技术虽然产生了许多不能解决的问题，但是产生的一些有意的问题比那些问题多得多。
2：科技并不会威胁生活的质量，相反地，科技改善了生活的质量。
3：科技也在一定程度上带来了一些问题。比如说网络游戏，车祸等等。
With the development of society, technology is becoming the topic people often discuss about. The speaker believed that technology creates more problems than it solves, and may threaten or damage the quality of life. I partially agree with the speaker's opinion, however, in my mind, technology bring us more benefit than problems it brings to us in whatever aspects.

Technology, general term for the processes by which human beings fashion tools and machines to increase their control and understanding of the material environment. It brings about some approaches which were used to solve problem that we cannot ravel out before, though it also contributes to some difficult problem. For example, with the development of technology internet which lead life becoming convenient was came into being from the middle of 20th. Before internet being devised, we often sent letters through letter carrier who will spend a large amount of time checking who sent the letter and where the letter will be sent. However with the internet letter will be delivered only by pressing the mouse, taking a few minutes, which is much easy and convenient. We no longer worrying whether letter is missing or not. What's more we need not frustrate for the long time it will take. So from the examples mentioned above, technology solves intractable problems than it takes.

Technology not only can solve intractable problems but also can improve the quality of life. Our life contains several aspects such what we eat, what we live and so on. However technology which penetrates in almost every aspect improves quality of life. Take cars for example, with a car people can go wherever he want to go and no body will take carriage to office and no one will walk from a state to another unless he has walking lust. Nobody can imagine that what the world will be like if there is no television set. We can spend leisure time on watching TV with family member or chatting on the internet. Such examples testify that life quality which around us has been changed even be improved.

Although technology indeed play a significant role in life, to some extent, it brings some problems exist in daily life. Although internet enhances the space of life, the number of computer games or internet games increases exponentially. Young people, especially juvenile, are addict to them which is called electric heroin. Whereas some of them even take schooling time to play internet games which contribute to grades declining linear. Car make life much convenient than before but the negative influence is that the traffic accidents become gradually severe. People hurt in the accident will expend a large amount of money in it which will lead economic problem that also threat to life.

As the saying goes,” every coin have two sides", technology is not exceptional. We thank for technology brings a lot of benefits and methods solve some intricate problems. However the negative problems technology takes will not be ignored.

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沙发

发表于 2006-2-23 21:48:04 |只看该作者

Issue 1 发了很久没人改

先把我的文章链接发上，请帮忙看一下
关于改你的文章，12点之前发上来
Issue 1

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板凳

发表于 2006-2-23 22:47:43 |只看该作者

修改如下

Technology creates more problems than it solves, and may threaten or damage the quality of life”
翻译：科学技术产生了许多不能解决的问题，对人们的生活质量构成威胁

1:科学技术虽然产生了许多不能解决的问题，但是产生的一些有意的问题比那些问题多得多。
2：科技并不会威胁生活的质量，相反地，科技改善了生活的质量。
3：科技也在一定程度上带来了一些问题。比如说网络游戏，车祸等等。

With the development of society, technology is becoming the topic people often discuss about(discuss是及物动词). The speaker believed that technology creates more problems than it solves, and may threaten or damage the quality of life. I partially agree with the speaker's opinion, however, in my mind, technology bring（brings） us more benefit than problems (it brings to us可省略) in whatever aspects.

Technology, general term for the processes by which human beings fashion tools and machines to increase their control and understanding of the material environment. It brings about some approaches which were used to solve problem that we cannot ravel out before, though it also contributes to some difficult problem(problems). For example, with the development of technology internet which lead life becoming convenient was came into being from the middle of 20th (appeared in the middle of 20th). Before internet being devised, we often sent letters through letter carrier who(which) will spend a large amount of time checking who sent the letter and where the letter will be sent. However with the internet letter will be delivered only by pressing the mouse, taking a few minutes, which is much easy and convenient. (建议改成An electronic letter can be sent so convenient that one need just press the mouse-the whole process merely takes a few seconds by the internet service.) We no longer worrying（worry） whether letter is missing or not. What's more we need not frustrate(不知道此单词是不是这样用) for the long time it will take. So from the examples mentioned above, technology solves intractable problems than it takes.

Technology not only can（can not only） solve intractable problems but also can(此处就可以省略了) improve the quality of life. Our life contains several aspects such what we eat, what we live and so on（为什么不用such+名词？）. However technology which penetrates in almost every aspect improves quality of life. Take cars for example,（建议改为句号了，后面为新的一句） with a car（此处是否要一个逗号） people can go wherever he want to go and no body will take carriage to office and no one will walk from a state to another unless he has walking lust.（这句写的有些奇怪，也许你比较喜欢这样的风格） Nobody can imagine that what the world will be like if there is no television set.（怎么没有过度，就突然说道电视了） We can spend leisure time on watching TV with family member or chatting on the internet. Such examples testify that life quality which around us（可以去掉，有时候不是刻意要写长句） has been changed even be improved.

Although technology indeed play a significant role in life, to some extent, it brings some problems exist（existing） in daily life. Although internet enhances the space of life, the number of computer games or internet games increases exponentially. Young people, especially juvenile, are addict(addict 本来就是动词，不需要are) to them which is called electric heroin. Whereas some of them even take schooling time to play internet games which contribute to grades declining linear(linearly). Car(Cars) make life much convenient than before but the negative influence is that the traffic accidents become gradually severe. People hurt in the accident will expend a large amount of money in it which will lead economic problem that also threat to life.(people hurt，in it 等几处请再斟酌)

As the saying goes,” every coin have two sides", technology is not exceptional. We thank for technology brings（thank 和 bring 不是两个动词了吗？） a lot of benefits and methods solve some intricate problems. However the negative problems technology takes will not be ignored.
1。写完自己是不是看都没看就发上来了呢？不少时态语态的问题自己是可以发现的
2。表达意思简洁明了最好，有些长句显得有点繁琐
3。水平有限，如果我有说错的地方，或你要表达的不是我改的意思，可回帖告诉我，共同进步

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sallyxindu
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地板

发表于 2006-2-24 00:46:01 |只看该作者

Issue196
“Technology creates more problems than it solves, and may threaten or damage the quality of life”
翻译：科学技术产生了许多不能解决的问题，对人们的生活质量构成威胁

1:科学技术虽然产生了许多不能解决的问题，但是产生的一些有意的问题比那些问题多得多。
这点其实可以当首段提出观点而不是一个分析段落
2：科技并不会威胁生活的质量，相反地，科技改善了生活的质量。
3：科技也在一定程度上带来了一些问题。比如说网络游戏，车祸等等。
分析太一手抓了，显然你市赞成科技更多带来好处的，那么你最好把带来好处分成两个详细部分来写，然后让步说下它的坏处。
With the development of society, technology is becoming the hot topic people often discuss about. The speaker believed that technology creates more problems than it solves, and may threaten or damage the quality of life.尽量不retate I partially agree with the speaker's opinion, however, in my mind, technology bring us more benefit than problems it brings to us in whatever aspects.
很清晰的开头。我也是这样开的，呵呵

Technology, general term for the processes by which human beings fashion tools and machines to increase their control and understanding of the material environment. 感觉应该有个插入语，我没太看明白这句子。It brings about some approaches which were used to solve problem that we cannot ravel out before, though it also contributes to some difficult problem.曲掉这个转折，否者会理解你后面的例子是说不好的饿。 For example, with the development of technology， internet which lead life becoming convenient was came into being from the middle of 20th.句子结构不好，调整下，with the advent of internet in the middle of 20the, our life is becomgng more convenient than ever before. Before internet being devised, we often sent letters through letter carrier who will spend a large amount of time checking who sent the letter and where the letter will be sent to. However with the internet letter will be delivered only by pressing the mouse, taking a few minutes, which is much easy and convenient. We no longer 动词worrying whether letter is missing or not. What's more ，we need not frustrate for the long time it will take. So from the examples mentioned above, technology solves intractable problems than it takes.
例子论述太单一，感觉比较浅。

Technology not only can solve intractable problems 感觉送信不是太难处理啊，你何不上面用基因什么的问题，突出intractalbe but also can improve the quality of life.其实上面的分析也说明提高了生活质量啊，方面是质量的一个方面。所以，你的TS不明确 Our life contains several aspects such what we eat, what we live and so on. However 不是转折关系啊technology which penetrates in almost every aspect improves quality of life. Take cars for example, with a car people can go wherever he want to go and no body will take carriage to office and no one will walk from a state to another unless he has walking lust. Nobody can imagine that what the world will be like if there is no television set. We can spend leisure time on watching TV with family member or chatting on the internet. Such examples testify that life quality which around us has been changed even be improved.
我觉得这短和上段都是论述便利，没太大区别。
Although technology indeed play a significant role in life, to some extent, it brings some negative problems existing in daily life. Although 词要多变internet enhances the space扩大空间而不是提高空间。 of life, the number of computer games or internet games increases exponentially. Young people, especially juvenile, 没必要强调吧，都是一个意思啊are addict to them which is called electric heroin. Whereas some of them even take schooling time to play internet games which contribute to grades declining linear. Car make life much convenient than before 论述缺点不要夹杂优点，否则太乱。but the negative influence is that the traffic accidents become gradually severe. People hurt in the accident will expend a large amount of money in it which will lead economic problem that also threat to life.最好有个总结句
这段的句子安排比较凌乱。although部分不要写太多，否则影响重点。
As the saying goes,” every coin have two sides", technology is not exceptional. We thank for technology brings a lot of benefits and methods solve some intricate problems. HoweverNevertheless, 变化下吧， the negative problems technology takes will shoudl not be ignored.

个别语法部分没有详细修改了，楼上的已经该得很仔细，有下划线的说明时态或其他简单的语法问题，自己再检查。另外，行文结构的建议在提纲上说了。

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