[a习作temp] argument53 『jet小组』第五次作业 [复制链接]

dreamstring
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电梯直达

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发表于 2008-2-12 22:53:04 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

ARGUMENT53 - Thirteen years ago, researchers studied a group of 25 infants who showed signs of mild distress when exposed to unfamiliar stimuli such as an unusual odor or a tape recording of an unknown voice. They discovered that these infants were more likely than other infants to have been conceived in early autumn, a time when their mothers' production of melatonin-a hormone known to affect some brain functions-would naturally increase in response to decreased daylight. In a follow-up study conducted earlier this year, more than half of these children-now teenagers-who had shown signs of distress identified themselves as shy. Clearly, increased levels of melatonin before birth cause shyness during infancy and this shyness continues into later life.

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This argument draws a conclusion that the increase of melatonin before birth cause shyness not only appears to infancy but also continue into later life. To substantiate this claim, a research of babies’ birth time is cited. The arguer further strengthens the viewpoint by citing a follow-up study. However, a careful examination of this argument reveals how groundless the conclusion is.

First of all, the study which is cited by the arguer showed that the infants who appeared signs of distress were more likely than others had been conceived in early autumn, and it is the time when their mothers produce melatonin than other time. Then the arguer draws a conclusion that it is the increased levels of melatonin that lead to the babies’ special characteristic. However, the arguer does not claim that every baby is conceived in early autumn, which means that some of them were not conceived in early autumn. So their mothers produce a normal level of melatonin, while they were also distress. It is possible that amount of melatonin, which is excreted by mothers in early autumn, does not play a key role in determining babies’ characteristic.

Secondly, the arguer does not suggest that there is no other special situation happened to the babies and their mothers except the decreasing of melatonin. It is possible that the melatonin, which is just proved influent some brain functions, is not the determinant factor of babies’ distress, but some other reasons. If the arguer can not provide evidence to show that all other situations of these distressed babies are same with other normal ones, I can not be convinced that the distress is melatonin’s function.

What’s more, the arguer cites a follow-up study which showed that more than half of these children identified themselves as shy when they are teenagers. Then the arguer expressed a conclusion that these babies’ shyness continues into their later life. It can not be denied that the arguer makes a mistake with conception. As far as we know, the 25 infants just showed distress. Distress is not shyness, and we have to admit that the arguer intertwines the conception of distress with shyness. Moreover, whether they are shy is not determined by their declamations. It should be researched in a scientific way. It is definitely that some of them are not shy while they said they are. Therefore, through a logical and rational analysis, the whole conclusion is unsound.

In sum, the arguer’s analysis and conclusion are full of flaws. To improve this argument, the arguer should do more researches or cite more results of researches to sound this argument. And the arguer should also treat the conception of distress and shyness carefully.

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macross_36
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沙发

发表于 2008-2-14 10:34:04 |只看该作者

This argument draws a conclusion that the increase of melatonin before birth cause shyness not only appears to infancy but also continue(-s) into later life. To substantiate this claim, a research of babies’ birth time is cited. The arguer further strengthens the viewpoint by citing a follow-up study. However, a careful examination of this argument reveals how groundless the conclusion is.

First of all, the study which is cited by the arguer showed that the infants who appeared signs of distress were more likely than others had been conceived in early autumn, and it is the (改成a) time when their mothers produce (more) melatonin than other time (in one year). Then the arguer draws a conclusion that it is the increased levels of melatonin that lead to the babies’ special characteristic. However, the arguer does not claim that every baby is conceived in early autumn, which means that some of them were not conceived in early autumn. So their mothers produce a normal level of melatonin, while they were also distress. It is possible that amount of melatonin, which is excreted by mothers in early autumn, does not play a key role in determining babies’ characteristic.

Secondly, the arguer does not suggest that there is no other special situation happened to the babies and their mothers except the decreasing (改成increase)of melatonin. It is possible that the melatonin, which is just proved influent some brain functions, is not the determinant factor of babies’ distress, but some other reasons. If the arguer can not provide evidence to show that all other situations of these distressed babies are (the) same with other normal ones, I can not be convinced that the distress is melatonin’s function.

What’s more, the arguer cites a follow-up study which showed that more than half of these children identified themselves as shy when they are teenagers. Then the arguer expressed a conclusion that these babies’ shyness continues into their later life. It can not be denied that the arguer makes a mistake with conception. As far as we know, the 25 infants just showed distress. Distress is not shyness, and we have to admit that the arguer intertwines the conception of distress with shyness. Moreover, whether they are shy is not determined by their declamations. It should be researched in a scientific way. It is definitely that some of them are not shy while they said they are. Therefore, through a logical and rational analysis, the whole conclusion is unsound(这句似乎更像是在批评全文，应该把whole conclusion稍作修改).
In sum, the arguer’s analysis and conclusion are full of flaws. To improve this argument, the arguer should do more researches or cite more results of researches to sound this argument. And the arguer should also treat the conception of distress and shyness carefully.