[a习作temp] 新手求狠拍，argu29 [复制链接]

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电梯直达

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发表于 2008-7-20 21:58:05 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

还有十几天要考了，第一次写，花了近两个小时，很着急，求狠拍，多谢多谢

29When Ida McAllister ran for mayor of Lake City four years ago, she failed to win even 30 percent of the vote. But since then, McAllister has made public her commitment to environmental causes. She would be wise, therefore, to announce her intention to close all Lake City parks to automobile traffic, thus following the example of the former mayor of Plainsville, Alecia Yu . On the recommendation of a small group of concerned citizens, Mayor Yu prohibited automobile traffic in all Plainsville parks, and therefore was credited with solving the pollution problem and improving the quality of life in Plainsville. This action would have great appeal to the citizens of Lake City, most of whom participate in the community's recycling program, and would guarantee McAllister's success in her current quest to be Lake City's new mayor.

In this argument the author tries to persuade us that announcing her intention to close all Lake City parks will guarantee McAllister's success in running for the mayor currently. To justify this conclusion, the author points out that a former mayor of another city did the same program and successed. Moreover, the author points out that many citizens of Lake City participate in the recycling program. However, I found this argument logically unconvincing in several respects as follows.
Firstly, the author fails giving any evidence to show that the residents don't expert parks opening to cars, and the author can't prove that the air pollution made by cars comes to citizens' attention. Also, he does not show the city's situation of the environment currently, maybe it is not necessary running the intention at all.
Secondly, the author cites an example of the former mayor of Painesville who did the same decision, and show it successfully solve the pollution problem and improve the quality of life in the city. Obviously, the author overlooks the other situations of the two cities, such as environment and air condition and so on, if the environment condition in Painesville is not so well as that in Lake City, the intention may be unsuitable in Lake City at all. Besides, Alecia Yu has already held a group of supporters before performing that intention. In comparison, if Ida announces her intention obtrusively, it is unsure that she could be supported as wished.
In addition, the author cites most of the citizens' participating to showing that they consider about environment problem, however, it obviously can't prove that they will support closing all parks to cars, as they are completely different.
Finally, even if the program is essential, it can't be the evidence to show that Ida is suitable to be a mayor, because environment is not the only section of the mayor's work. Otherwise, there are also other candidates whose information we do not know, what if they are more suitable than her?
In sum, the argument is unconvincing as it stands, to make me persuaded, he must show that the city really needs Ida's intention, he should investigate more about environment situation of the Lake City, then collect more altitudes and suggestions from the residents. The author must also provide that Ida's other plans are also good for the city's process and no other candidate is more suitable than her.