[活动] TOEFL 2009上半年-Dark_Tournament写作组 tensionhjj第十六次作业 [复制链接]

tensionhjj
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电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2009-3-28 17:38:02 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

参加写作组的第一篇文章。。大家死命拍！！！！

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People are busy doing different things that they can do few things well. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.（03/03/07）

There exist different opinions on the issue that whether people who are busy doing different things can do few things well.Some people argue that it is more beneficial to focus on one field than do different things that they can have enough time to do the things well.Personally I find it hard for me to support this opinion by following reasons.
In the first place,there are many relationships among different things.Namely,a physical scentist should hold some knowledge about mathematics which can make his conclusion more convicing
and a writer who likes listening to pop music,watching film,reading the lately books which can bring many insperation to him will be wiser than the one who doesn’t do that.
Secondly, doing different things can,directly or indirectly,not only equip people with various knowledge but also widen their eyesights.The deep impact of doing different things is readily discernible in a number of areas:the lately news getting from wathching TV or reading newspaper;the introduction of state-of-art concepts and technology;making friends and learning some skills.If we widen our eyesights,we can do most things well.A house wife who can do some other things besides the housework such as go shopping,hiking a mountain,reading books may feel happy.
Last but not least,doing different things is more intersting than doing same things or just doing one thing everyday.If you feel boring in your work,how can you do your work well?
In general,doing different things makes our life increasingly more colorful as a result we are not forced to worry about that doing different things will give rise to doing few things well.

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mimica
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沙发

发表于 2009-3-29 11:00:37 |只看该作者

There exist (are)different opinions on the issue that whether people who are busy doing different things can do few things well.Some people argue that it is more beneficial to focus on one field than do different things (so)that they can have enough time to do the things well.Personally I find it hard for me to support this opinion by following reasons.

In the first place,there are many relationships among different things.Namely,a physical scentist should hold some knowledge about mathematics which can make his conclusion more convicing A* W I, C* O5 R
and a writer who likes listening to pop music,watching film,reading the lately books which can bring many insperation to him will be wiser than the one who doesn’t do that.(来句总结性语言更好)9 D* m# B8 p# g. N) b

Secondly, doing different things can,directly or indirectly,not only equip people with various knowledge but also widen their eyesights.The deep impact of doing different things is readily discernible in a number of areas:the lately news getting from wathching TV or reading newspaper;the introduction of state-of-art concepts and technology;making friends and learning some skills.（这个并列可改进，前两句是名词，最后一句成了making friends动词）If we widen our eyesights,we can do most things well.A house wife who can do some other things besides the housework such as go shopping（这个本来就是housewife的本职工作吧）,hiking a mountain,reading books （是否用hike mountains更好）may feel happy. 0 j* K
?/ W7 O( x7 a$ b$ s/ _
Last but not least,doing different things is more intersting than doing same things or just doing one thing everyday.If you feel boring in your work,how can you do your work well?

In general,doing different things makes our life increasingly more colorful as a result we are not forced to worry about that doing different things will give rise to doing few things well.（最后这句尚待推敲）2 S-

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belle流风
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新手上路

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板凳

发表于 2009-3-29 11:38:16 |只看该作者

文字好大！！

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neozhongnl
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寄托新兵

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地板

发表于 2009-3-30 23:41:06 |只看该作者

There exist different opinions on the issue that(删) whether people who are busy doing different things can do few things well.(这句语法有问题,无法读懂)Some people argue that it is more beneficial to focus on one field than do different things (SO) that they can have enough time to do the things well.Personally I find it hard for me to support this opinion by following reasons.(这样用否定来阐述观点似乎不如直接阐述,个人意见)

In the first place,there are many relationships among different things(这句话美国人看了会晕的).Namely,a physical scentist should hold some knowledge about mathematics which can make his conclusion more convicing and a writer who likes listening to pop music,watching film,reading the lately books which can bring many insperation to him will be wiser than the one who doesn’t do that

Secondly, doing different things can,directly or indirectly,not only equip people with various knowledge but also widen their eyesights.The deep impact of doing different things is readily discernible in a number of areas:the lately news getting from wathching TV or reading newspaper;the introduction of state-of-art concepts and technology;making friends and learning some skills.If we widen our eyesights,we can do most things well.A house wife who can do some other things besides the housework such as go shopping,hiking a mountain,reading books may feel happy.

Last but not least,doing different things is more intersting than doing same things or just doing one thing everyday.If you feel boring in your work,how can you do your work well?

In general,doing different things makes our life increasingly more(前面的两个词是一个意思) colorful as a result we are not forced to worry about that doing different things will give rise to doing few things well.(这句话也是有语法错误的,没怎么理解)

整体的结构还是很清晰的
每一个SUB ARGUMENT最好能更有力一些
结尾的语法错误尽量要避免吧

独自等待.默默忍受.

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