[a习作temp] 第一次作业题，A-147——我的处女作啊！ [复制链接]

Janeissogreat
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电梯直达

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发表于 2009-6-5 21:46:53 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

我的第一篇的Argument啊，痛苦啊，搞了一个下午，还是不咋样，但还是得见光的，这样才能不断进步嘛！（因为是第一篇，真的不知道怎么下手，所以参考了点么模版，请见谅啊！我一定会努力的！）

In this argument the editorial concludes that the sales of Whirlwind video games are likely to soar in the next few months albeit it has declined over the past two years. To justify its conclusion the author puts forward a recent survey of video-games which shows life-like graphics and most newly computers are the most important features in video games and Whirlwind has just introduced several such games. What is more, it carries on an extensive advertising campaign directed at people 10 to 25 years old,who are most likely to play video games. However, this argument is unconvincing as it is based on a ungrounded reason and ignores several possible reasons despite of those mentioned.
First of all, the author assumes that 10 to 25 years old is the age group most likely to play video games, however, this is not necessarily the case. For example, the thirties who are striving for careers generally burden a lot, consequentially, chances are that they turn to video-games for entertainment or, to some extent,a way to relieve their feelings. To the contrary, the tens or older may be not the target.The truth is that they are in the mercy of their parents and teachers and often they can not afford to many of the video games, although they are quite likely to show a tremendous interest on video-games. So this argument is unwarranted at this point.
Secondly, the author uses the survey that states lifelike graphics and the most up-to-date games are the most important features in a video game to conclude that Whirlwind video games will have a good sale by introducing several such games, however there are many other features in video games that should not be overlooked, such as themes, piths as well as the feeling of thrill. Only with newly technology, lack of pith, the video games can not be as popular as expected, only with lifelike graphics, overseeing the connotation of the game, Whirlwind games also can not fulfil its initial aim. Therefore, the sales of video games are not only dependent on their one or two features and Whirlwind should take the various reasons into consideration.
Thirdly, if the age group, 10 to 25 years old,are really fond of Whirlwind games with lifelike graphics and up-to-date computers, it,yet, does not mean they will buy Whirlwind video games. Whirlwind should take their competitor into consideration. If there are a lot of video games like Whirlwind games in the market, a soar in its sales is impossible. What is more, a depression of the market economic can keep down the sales of the video games.In this circumstances, people have to cut down their expenditure and then possibly postpone the idea to buy the video games. So at this point the conclusion is not so well grounded.
In conclusion, the editorial has not convinced me that the sales of Whirlwind video games are likely to increase dramatically in the next few months.To better justify the conclusion, I think Whirlwind should do a survey of its age group who are most likely to play video games and think over the features of the video games comprehensively that will attract more people to buy their products. What is more, Whirlwind should do a further investigation of the market economic and its competitors, and only with all sides considered, can Whirlwind have a reasonable prospect of its sales.