[i习作temp] 0910AW Issue48 还有4天就考了，大家帮忙看看这篇我写的比较难受的 [复制链接]

如果大家都忙改不了就大概说说哪逻辑错的比较厉害，我改就行了！马上考了好紧张啊，谢谢大家了！

TOPIC: ISSUE48 - "The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten."

WORDS: 603
TIME: 00:45:00
DATE: 2009-7-4 21:45:00

I fundamentally agree with the author's opinion that while the study of history places so much emphasis on individuals, most significant events and trends in history were made possible by the forgotten groups of people. I justify my point of view by examining two groups of people that we constantly miss in historical studies.

We have forgotten those who unconditionally help, whether in accordance with or against their own will, the successful few to make significant historical events and trends happen. In the realm of politics, Winston Churchill's preeminent military talent and his intelligent strategies have been constantly admired and studied in history classes, but it was the young sodiers who waved their tears and blood on the battle field that transformed Churchill’s strategies to victories. In the field of business and science, Edwin Land, the father of instant camera, was regarded as one of the America's most innovative sicentists and most successful businessmen, but it is the engineers persistently working in the lab and the market reseachers earnstly handing customers questionnaires that made Polaroid Corporation’s profit soar. We forget these hidden heroes and heroines who were the employees of sapient bosses, or the sodiers of intelligent captains. Unconditionally helping their leaders, it is these unnoticed groups that pushed the recognized individuals on the peak of success, and made history progresses and develops on and on.

In addition, we also forgot those who fervently support the work and advocacy of the giants without taking their own social status and financial conditions into account. We only see Franklin Roosevelt’s conspicuous success in booming aggregate demand of United States during the Great Depression because of New Deal. However, we did not see those brave American citizens possessing one hundred percent confidence in their president and their nation, who pulled out the only dollar from their wallet to drag the nation a little step closer to the end of the economic storm. We only see Martin Luther King standing on the stage encouraging African Americans to be brave and advocating the born equal rights of all races. Nevertheless, we fail to notice the black people, who not only shed tears for King's speech but also extended his declaration in real life and constantly fought for their own rights. The giants can achieve none without the loyal and fervent support from the people who believe in them. Therefore, the history marches forward solving problems such as economic crisis, racistism, inhumanity, undemocray etc. owing to the brave and persistent help from the forgotten supporters.

However, this does not mean that the remembered individuals are not important at all. If the significant events and trends in history is a skyscraper, the leaders serve as the architect who draft the building, and the group of subordinates and supporters are the workers who place pieces of bricks according to the plan. An accurate and well-organized draft is the prequisite for smooth and efficient construction of the building. This indicates that without an intelligent and sophisticated leader, all efforts from employees, sodiers, workers etc. are hence dispered, inefficient or even futle. Hence, both the few individuals and long forgotten groups of people perform as the creater and achiever of major history trends and events.

In conclusion, I fundamentally agree with the author's contension for we fail to remember those who unconditionally work for their leaders to achieve success, and those who fervently and loyally support the work or advocacy of the remembered historical giants. However, the immortal few are also important to the progress of human history, for they directed and instructed the dispersed efforts of the public to achieved the desireable success.