[i习作temp] Issue147 【loveaw】第八次作业 [复制链接]

njuliuyang
UID：2300567

寄托新兵

Rank: 2

声望: 0
寄托币: 189
注册时间: 2007-2-4
精华: 0
帖子: 0

电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2007-2-22 23:33:27 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

Issue147 【loveaw】第八次作业

"Tradition and modernization are incompatible. One must choose between them."
Position: tradition and modernization可和谐发展，并不互斥
一、传统伴随着人类历史发展形成，包括物质文化两方面，大部分的内容将保持不变。
二、现代化是在传统的基础上发展起来。
三、尽管如此，二者仍有很多冲突，差异
WORDS: 424+37

The speaker alleges that tradition and modernization are mutually exclusive alternatives so that one must make a choice between them. From my viewpoint, however, both of them can develop in harmony in that they are not incompatible to a significant degree.

To begin with, in my view, tradition, gradually forming and evolving with the development of the human history and culture, is a particular custom and can be divided into two classes: material and culture, the majority of which will remain unchanged with the development of society to a great degree. Consider, for instance, various festivals in our daily life are nearly the same as what they were before. People in the majority of English-speaking countries, and even quiet a few other countries in the world, celebrate Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and Saint Valentine’s Day, all of which are part of traditions formed and developed in the past and are likely to remain unchanged in the future. In addition to those festivals, our way of life and a wealth of living habits do not vary a lot to the extent that nearly overall people in the western countries have dinner by knife and fork, which are the same as those did in the past.

On the other hand, modernization, seems as the opposite of tradition, is on the basis of tradition and, in many respects, still remain a myriad of traditional content and manners. That is to say, modernization is not necessarily a mutually exclusive alternative to tradition. For example, compasses, which were used to indicate geographic direction on sail and in the course of exploration before, serving as an indicator of direction, still are popular with most of sailors as well as explorers and can be seen on an overwhelming majority of modern motor ships, though they are added additional functions and become more powerful and keener nowadays.

While tradition can serve as the fundament of modernization and both of them can develop in harmony, on many occasions, there are a large number of conflicts and differences between them. The change of costumes, especially the suit-dress，for instance, reveals the dramatic differences between them. The costumes which women wore were usually conservative, while those worn in contemporary society are far sexier, such as mini skirts, which were much different from those before. [What is more, mass production, calling for widespread utilization of machines in contemporary society, exerts a negative and influential effect on nature and pollute the environment to a significant degree which differs from the traditional production manner.]

In sum, I cherish the claim that tradition as well as modernization can develop in harmony on the ground that tradition remain unchanged to a great degree in modern society and modernization develops based on tradition, though a lot of conflicts and differences between them are inevitable and apparent on many occasions.

回应
0

使用道具举报

katrinajj
UID：2242021

中级会员

Rank: 4

声望: 0
寄托币: 408
注册时间: 2006-8-14
精华: 0
帖子: 2

沙发

发表于 2007-2-23 18:53:03 |只看该作者

The speaker alleges that tradition and modernization are mutually exclusive alternatives so that one must make a choice between them. From my viewpoint, however, both of them can develop in harmony in that they are not incompatible to a significant degree.

To begin with, in my view, tradition, gradually forming and evolving with the development of the human history and culture, is a particular custom and can be divided into two classes: material and culture, the majority of which will remain unchanged with the development of society to a great degree. [这里既然分为了两类,但是对于第一类怎么一点都不提及呢?]Consider, for instance, various festivals in our daily life are nearly the same as what they were before. People in the majority of English-speaking countries, and even quiet a few other countries in the world, celebrate Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and Saint Valentine’s Day, all of which are part of traditions formed and developed in the past and are likely to remain unchanged in the future. In addition to those festivals, our way of life and a wealth of living habits do not vary a lot to the extent that nearly overall people in the western countries have dinner by knife and fork, which are the same as those did in the past.

On the other hand, modernization, seems as the opposite of tradition, is on the basis of tradition and, in many respects, still remain a myriad of traditional content and manners. That is to say, modernization is not necessarily a mutually exclusive alternative to tradition.[这里可以加点分析来充斥内容,感觉这段很单调] For example, compasses, which were used to indicate geographic direction on sail and in the course of exploration before, serving as an indicator of direction, still are popular with most of sailors as well as explorers and can be seen on an overwhelming majority of modern motor ships, though they are added additional functions and become more powerful and keener nowadays.

While tradition can serve as the fundament of modernization and both of them can develop in harmony, on many occasions, there are a large number of conflicts and differences between them. [文章主题为可以和谐发展,但是这段似乎冲突了之后没有回到主题上]The change of costumes, especially the suit-dress，for instance, reveals the dramatic differences between them. The costumes which women wore were usually conservative, while those worn in contemporary society are far sexier, such as mini skirts, which were much different from those before. What is more, mass production, calling for widespread utilization of machines in contemporary society, exerts a negative and influential effect on nature and pollute[pollutes] the environment to a significant degree which differs from the traditional production manner.

In sum, I cherish the claim that tradition as well as modernization can develop in harmony on the ground that tradition remain unchanged to a great degree in modern society and modernization develops based on tradition, though a lot of conflicts and differences between them are inevitable and apparent on many occasions.[从这句可以看出第四段内容的目的,但是和第一段主题不对应,第四段也没有和最后一段的总结联系很紧密,在第四段加点过度句总结句为好~~]

PS: LZ的这篇文章字数有点少,给人的感觉很单薄,论证深度不够~~

使用道具举报