[i习作temp] Issue48 [勇往直前小组] by strontium023 [复制链接]

strontium023
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电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2007-7-25 06:28:24 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

48
It is no doubt that the most significant events and trends in history were not made by famous few only,but by groups of people in that era.However when setting about a study,we always choose individuals as it is more convenient and representational.

Admittedly,the plain people like most of us,consist on the history,even they creat history every day and night.It may possible that one day these people do something relevant about a significant event.But they may be absolutely unconciousness about it.They will do everyting day after day,they don’t care what had happened outside.Therefore,select one of them for reserch is insignificant.But for the famous one is not like such condition.

Every era has its famous people in various area,they are all kown by us.Take famous people in Renaissance for example,We can easily illustrate that Vinci is the one of the best painter at that time,Dante was the outrunner of the literature,as well as Galileo who is considered as a greatest astronomer.They stand for their own areas,therefore it provided a direction for us if want to study deeply.

Moreover,as we study the famous people,we will discover the requirements for a certain age.When studying President George Washinton,the aspiration for free and independant jump into our mind.When reserch President Abraham Lincoln,the demands for a deeply free was experienced.A strong and determinated America shows,when explore the whole life of President Franklin Roosevelt.The president through the history of American not only represent themselves,but also become a symbol of history.We comprehends the spirit in different time through the representive person.

In addition,the achivements of famous man often become milestones of history,such as Universal Gravitition and Theory of Relativety,they divide new epoch for physics.Thanks to the discoverer Newton and Einstein,unless them,the new epoch of physics might be delayed or even faint.The famous person always did unmeasurable contribution to the history of human being,surely it could not be omitted.

Lastly,a famous man stands for a mainstream standard of value.Listening the Hillbilly Cat's song or enjoying the music of Mozart,we may experience more intuitionistic about a distance epoch.Accepting another value become easier through the works which reflects the value in one history.

As the famous individuals stands for the requirements,milestones and value of one period,it is always choosen for study.We choose the typical one,but ultimately we know the person in that era.They are not the one who have long been forgotten,they create the history as well as the famous one,the history will never foget them.

54、
1、题目说得太绝对化了。过去教会了我们很多东西。过去是一面镜子。通过历史的兴衰成败可以让我们从中吸取教训
，吸收经验。
2、当然现在作出重要的决定得具体问题具体分析，得结合现在的实际情况。
120、
思路类似上题
221、
类似啊
190、
这道题对题目有点不了解啊。

这个暑假别样凉爽.......给自己一个全新的自己......

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linshao
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沙发

发表于 2007-7-25 16:21:33 |只看该作者

It is no doubt that the most significant events and trends in history were not made by famous few only, but also by groups of people in that era. However when setting about a study, we always choose individuals as it is more convenient and representational.
（开头很简洁，但是显得单薄了点）
Admittedly, the plain people like most of us, consist on the history, even they create history every day and night. It may possible that one day these people do something relevant about a significant event. But they may be absolutely unconscious about it. They will do everything day after day, they don’t care what had happened outside. Therefore, select one of them for research is insignificant. But for the famous one is not like（去掉like
，不然感觉是china English） such condition.
（这段话感觉不好，题目中groups of people是most significant events and trends中的，并不是说整个history）
Every era has its famous people in various area,（可去） they are all known by us. Take famous people in Renaissance for example, We can easily illustrate that Vinci is the one of the best painter at that time, Dante was the outrunner of the literature, as well as Galileo （伽利略不是文艺复兴时候的人吧）who is considered as a greatest astronomer. They stand for their own area, therefore it provided a direction for us if want to study deeply.

Moreover,as we study the famous people,we will discover the requirements for a certain age.When studying President George Washinton,the aspiration for free and independant jump into our mind.When research President Abraham Lincoln,the demands for a deeply free was experienced.A strong and determinated America shows,when explore the whole life of President Franklin Roosevelt.The president through the history of American not only represent themselves,but also become a symbol of history.We comprehends the spirit in different time through the representive person.
（这段论述很好啊！例子非常丰富啊！超赞！）
In addition,the achivements of famous man often become milestones of history,such as Universal Gravitition and Theory of Relativety,they divide new epoch for physics.Thanks to the discoverer Newton and Einstein,unless them,the new epoch of physics might be delayed or even faint.The famous person always did unmeasurable contribution to the history of human being,surely it could not be omitted.
（这段的例子不好，个人发明并不是most significant events and trends啊）
Lastly,a famous man stands for a mainstream standard of value.Listening the Hillbilly Cat's song or enjoying the music of Mozart,we may experience more intuitionistic about a distance epoch.Accepting another value become easier through the works which reflects the value in one history.
这段话很好，但感觉有点偏了。
As the famous individuals stands for the requirements,milestones and value of one period,it is always choosen for study.We choose the typical one,but ultimately we know the person in that era.They are not the one who have long been forgotten,they create the history as well as the famous one,the history will never foget them.
结尾不错。
写完作文后最好先读几遍，看看有没有拼写错误，不然老是写错，你自己没法纠正，会影响考试的！
总的说全文内容很丰富！只是有些论述偏了！感觉不错。

[ 本帖最后由 linshao 于 2007-7-25 16:22 编辑 ]

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高加索
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板凳

发表于 2007-7-25 18:04:25 |只看该作者

It is no doubt that the most significant events and trends in history were not made by famous few only,but by groups of people in that era.However when setting about a study,we always choose individuals as it is more convenient and representational.（论点挺明确的）

Admittedly,the plain people like most of us,consist on（？这词组是什么意思） the history,even they creat history every day and night.It may possible that one day these people do something relevant about a significant event.But they may be absolutely unconciousness about it.They will do everyting day after day,they don’t care what had happened outside.Therefore,select one of them for reserch is insignificant.But for the famous one is not like such condition.（说的挺有意思的）

Every era has its famous people in various area,they are all kown by us.Take famous people in Renaissance for example,We can easily illustrate that Vinci is the one of the best painter at that time,Dante was the outrunner of the literature,as well as Galileo（不是文艺复兴时期的哦） who is considered as a greatest astronomer.They stand for their own areas,therefore it provided a direction for us if want to study deeply.

Moreover,as we study the famous people,we will discover the requirements for a certain age.When studying President George Washinton,the aspiration for free and independant jump into our mind.When reserch President Abraham Lincoln,the demands for a deeply free was experienced.A strong and determinated America shows,when explore the whole life of President Franklin Roosevelt.The president through the history of American not only represent themselves,but also become a symbol of history.We comprehends the spirit in different time through the representive person.（例子很丰富）

In addition,the achivements of famous man often become milestones of history,such as Universal Gravitition and Theory of Relativety,they divide new epoch for physics.Thanks to the discoverer Newton and Einstein,unless them,the new epoch of physics might be delayed or even faint.The famous person always did unmeasurable contribution to the history of human being,surely it could not be omitted.（还有科学领域的例子，不错）

Lastly,a famous man stands for a mainstream standard of value.Listening the Hillbilly Cat's song or enjoying the music of Mozart,we may experience more intuitionistic about a distance epoch.Accepting another value become easier through the works which reflects the value in one history.（要点名研究价值观也是研究历史的重要部分哦）

As the famous individuals stands for the requirements,milestones and value of one period,it is always choosen for study.We choose the typical one,but ultimately we know the person in that era.They are not the one who have long been forgotten,they create the history as well as the famous one,the history will never foget them.（结尾论点总结的不错）

个别词句还要再精确一些，否则可能会影响意思的表达哦
我感觉这篇issue很难写得，你写得还不错，加油

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