[i习作temp] issue38 求互改！！ [复制链接]

TOPIC: ISSUE38 - "In the age of television, reading books is not as important as it once was. People can learn as much by watching television as they can by reading books."
WORDS: 583          TIME: 12:45:00 AM         
    In this age with high development of science and technology, there are many modern instruments, such as television and internet, which have brought us much convenience and amusement in our lives. While we are amused and fascinated by such great inventions, we may find ourselves having lost something important. Nowadays, lots of us prefer watching a TV show on their bed rather than reading a famous novel, or prefer seeing a famous star rather than learning something new,  which deserves our thinking. As far as I am concerned, reading books is absolutely no less important than before and we can never lose such a habit from which we would benefit a great deal.开头段要总起,不要在背景介绍上用过多笔墨

   In the first place, there is no complete similarity between TV and books so the later can never be totally substituted by the former. Generally speaking, we have learned most of our knowledge from all kinds of books since we were young. When we were born, we learned to read letters and numbers from our parents. Later we went to schools, we studied mathematics, English, science, from our subject books. However, when one is tired after a whole day's work or study, he may turn to television for relax and amusement. So books are an inseperate 你是不是想说independent? part in our lives which bring to us most of knowledge and information, while television is an addition that adds hue to our daily lives. 文章题目只是问你是不是通过 TV 是否能和看书学到同样多的知识,并没说要取代

   In the second place, although TV programs seem more attractive than books, book can let one make the most of his imagination. When we watch TV, we enjoy the beautiful scene on the screen and are attracted by the sound. When we read books, we not only read them but also taste them. Read history makes one to retrospect on things that happened in the world and greatly respect people who have changed our history. Read poems makes one to be intoxicated into the beautiful words and one would be greatly edified from them. Read science can intrigue stimulate one's interest and curiosity thus one may not only be satisfied by what, but also wants to know why. It is books that make us to look straightly into the inner part of our history, our world, and ourselves. 最后一句总结的不错

   In the third place, as we know, book is more convenient than TV. We can take the book with us wherever we go and it is always our most intimate friend. We can also take notes on books once we find something important. The situation for TV is much more complex. Without the support of TV signal, we can not enjoy the intriguing programs. And we are not able to watch TV programs even when the local communicating measurement is not complete, which would dissatisfy us. 这一段跟学知识无关,没扣主题

   Last but not the least, we can never neglect the current negtive effect which is brought about by television. Many people, especially children studying at school, often drop their books and schedules and turn on the TV to amuse themselves instead, as soon as they go home. Such people may suffer from addiction to TV, unwilling to work or study, which are likely to cause low efficiency and a totally bad result.  这儿好像与主题无关吧?

最后两段没扣主题,全文应该为通过 TV 是否能和看书学到同样多的知识这句话服务. 开头写法在琢磨一下