[i习作temp] ISSUE88 [Dancing in the Dark] 第2次作业 by fingshang [复制链接]

fingshang
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电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2009-6-6 01:34:35 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

本帖最后由 fingshang 于 2009-6-6 03:15 编辑

Issue 88
总频率:135
"Technologies not only influence but actually determine social customs and ethics."

Influence:
元宵节的灯笼

Determine：春晚
试管婴儿 表兄妹结婚

Key Word: influence determine

思路开拓
===========
什么是技术?
技术有什么影响?
什么是CUSTOMS?
什么是ETHICS?
Customs and ethics are determined by?
What’s influence?
What’s determining?
What’s the difference between influences and determines?

提纲
======
1引入问题： 对概念和讨论主体的界定
技术是什么？ 习俗和伦理又是什么 给出文章总的论点：Technologies not only influence but actually determine social customs and ethics.

2 the relationship between technologies and customs & ethics
技术具备影响和决定习惯和道德理念的理论基础
3 influence 的实例
4 determine 的实例
5 conclusions

正文

Technologies are the practical application of knowledge especially in a particular area. And custom can be defined as long-established practice considered as unwritten law. As clearly stated，ethics are moral beliefs and rules about right and wrong. An exploration of the relationships among these three conceptions will be discussed as follow.

Technologies, as is defined to be the practical application of knowledge, synchronize with the emergence of human being. The history of human development is a history of technology as well--- from the first stone our ancestors casted at the mammoth to the laptop on our knees. The tools of human being’s production changed times from blunt instruments to precise computer-control machine tools. At the same time, the scope of human being and their capabilities to adapt and change the nature unprecedentedly boost. Empirical historical research concluded that the development of productive forces is a prerequisite for the development of others, such as culture、 politics、 arts、sports，etc. Customs and ethics are not the exception.
History is full of such examples. On the aspects of social customs, with the widespread of TV in china, celebration of the most important festival---spring festival---changed from traditionally visiting relatives to watching the live TV programs. As to ethic believes, test-tube baby was at first treated as witchcraft and blasphemy. But now the advantage of one hospital is judged on whether they master this kind of technique.

Technologies not only influenced the superficial forms of the customs and ethics of our society, but also determine them.
According a recent study, with the dating sites on the internet burgeoning all over the world, more and more young people get used to chat on keyboard rather than face to face. At the very beginning, children were forbidden to play online games. Nowadays, specialized schools of training game designer and program testers are subsidized by the government and became a main industry of some countries. A notable compromise of ethics to technologies can be seen in this case. New ethics will be established and enhanced in the future with the development of technologies.
In sum, technologies play an important role on social customs and ethics' changes. Given enough time, even comes to some ethics that deeply hold in people's mind, technology is decisive enough to change them.

时间比较紧这可能是比较接近我真是水平的一篇ISSUE 真心期待大家的帮助看看真实的我还有那些需要加强的先谢谢你们宝贵的时间了

fingshang

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amdsr
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沙发

发表于 2009-6-6 10:51:55 |只看该作者

Technologies are the practical application of knowledge especially in a particular area. And custom can be defined as long-established practice considered as unwritten law. As clearly stated，ethics are moral beliefs and rules about right and wrong. An exploration of the relationships among these three conceptions will be discussed as follow.

Technologies, as is defined to be the practical application of knowledge, synchronize with the emergence of human being. The history of human development is a history of technology as well--- from the first stone our ancestors casted at the mammoth to the laptop on our knees. The tools of human being’s production changed times from blunt instruments to precise computer-control machine tools. At the same time, the scope of human being and their capabilities to adapt and change the nature unprecedentedly boost(boost貌似是一个及物动词). Empirical historical research concluded that the development of productive forces is a prerequisite for the development of others, such as culture、 politics、 arts、sports，etc. Customs and ethics are not the exception.
History is full of such examples. On the aspects of social customs, with the widespread of TV in china, celebration of the most important festival---spring festival---changed from traditionally visiting relatives to watching the live TV programs. As to ethic believes, test-tube baby was at first treated as witchcraft and blasphemy. But now the advantage of one hospital is judged on whether they master this kind of technique.

Technologies not only influenced the superficial forms of the customs and ethics of our society, but also determine them.
According a recent study, with the dating sites on the internet burgeoning all over the world, more and more young people get used to chat on keyboard rather than face to face. At the very beginning, children were forbidden to play online games. Nowadays, specialized schools of training game designer and program testers are subsidized by the government and became a main industry of some countries. A notable compromise of ethics to technologies can be seen in this case. New ethics will be established and enhanced in the future with the development of technologies.
In sum, technologies play an important role on social customs and ethics' changes. Given enough time, even comes to some ethics that deeply hold in people's mind, technology is decisive enough to change them.

文章非常清晰流畅，读着痛快~:loveliness:
小错误也很少啊，文字方面感觉没很多需要改的呢~
作者所持的是完全同意的观点，不过在论证technology 能够determine customs and ethics的时候感觉所举的例子不是非常切题，尤其是和ethics的联系不大，有些削弱了说服力，尤其是在作者所持的这一观点通常都是被别人否认和质疑的情况下，我认为这一部分的论证应该再加强一些才好。

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mobius.x64
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板凳

发表于 2009-6-7 10:30:44 |只看该作者

本帖最后由 mobius.x64 于 2009-6-7 10:35 编辑

Technologies are the practical application of knowledge especially in a particular area. And custom can be defined as long-established practice considered as unwritten law. As clearly stated，ethics are moral beliefs and rules about right and wrong. An exploration of the relationships among these three conceptions will be discussed as follow.

Technologies, as is defined to be the practical application of knowledge, synchronize with the emergence of human being. The history of human development is a history of technology as well--- from the first stone our ancestors casted(cast) at the mammoth to the laptop on our knees. The tools of human being’s production changed times from blunt instruments to precise computer-control machine tools. At the same time, the scope of human being and their capabilities to adapt and change the nature unprecedentedly boost(the scope... is expanded to an unprecedented range?). Empirical historical research concluded that the development of productive forces is a prerequisite for the development of others, such as culture、 politics、 arts、sports，etc. Customs and ethics are not the exception.

History is full of such examples. On the aspects of social customs, with the widespread of TV in china, celebration of the most important festival---spring festival---changed from traditionally visiting relatives to watching the live TV programs. As to ethic believes, test-tube baby was at first treated as witchcraft and blasphemy. But now the advantage of one hospital is judged on whether they master this kind of technique.

Technologies not only influenced the superficial forms of the customs and ethics of our society, but also determine them.
According (to?) a recent study, with the dating sites on the internet burgeoning all over the world, more and more young people get used to chat on keyboard rather than face to face. At the very beginning, children were forbidden to play online games. Nowadays, specialized schools of training game designer and program testers are subsidized by the government and became a main industry of some countries. A notable compromise of ethics to technologies can be seen in this case. New ethics will be established and enhanced in the future with the development of technologies.(关于游戏的例子, 感觉用在这里证明道德对技术的妥协似乎欠妥, 游戏产业本身从来不会挑战道德, 而在那些开放程度较高的社会里游戏也不会因一两个叫兽的文章而被定义成电子海洛因. 比如因避孕技术进步而越来越流行的婚前性行为对基督教的道德挑战也许更合适… 一家之言, 有不妥还请指正:P)

In sum, technologies play an important role on social customs and ethics' changes. Given enough time, even comes to some ethics that deeply hold in people's mind, technology is decisive enough to change them.

看得出作者确实是在按实战要求写作. 限时写出流畅的文字已经不容易, 下次在破题和举例论证上有所改进就更好了(话说我的例证也需要加强...)
加油!

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virgo_zhang0910
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地板

发表于 2009-6-7 15:34:10 |只看该作者

Technologies are the practical application of knowledge especially in a particular area.(觉得前面technology 用单数好些，和application前后一致) And custom can be defined as long-established practice considered as unwritten law. As clearly stated，ethics are moral beliefs and rules about right and wrong.(As clearly stated我查了一下，这样用的很少，换个其他方法表达可能好些)An exploration of the relationships among these three conceptions will be discussed as follow(as follows).

Technologies, as is defined to be the practical application of knowledge, synchronize with the emergence of human being(同样是感觉technology 用单数可能好些，前后主谓单复数一致). The history of human development is a history of technology as well--- from the first stone our ancestors casted at the mammoth to the laptop on our knees. (这个例子很有趣)The tools of human being’s production changed times from blunt instruments to precise computer-control machine tools. At the same time, the scope of human being and their capabilities to adapt and change the nature unprecedentedly boost. Empirical historical research concluded that the development of productive forces is a prerequisite for the development of others, such as culture、 politics、 arts、sports，etc. Customs and ethics are not the exception.(culture是否应该换成cultures; 最后一句用Customs and ethics are no exception可能更地道些)History is full of such examples. On the aspects of social customs, with the widespread of TV in china(China), celebration of the most important festival---spring festival---changed from traditionally visiting relatives to watching the(这个the 可能可以去掉) live TV programs. As to ethic believes, test-tube baby was at first treated as witchcraft and blasphemy. But now the advantage of one hospital is judged on whether they master this kind of technique. (the advantage of one hospital 是什么意思啊？; judge from较judge on 可能使用更多些，你再考虑一下)
Technologies not only influenced the superficial forms of the customs and ethics of our society, but also determine them.
According a recent study, with the dating sites on the internet burgeoning all over the world, more and more young people get used to chat on keyboard rather than face to face. At the very beginning, children were forbidden to play online games. Nowadays, specialized schools of training game designer and program testers are subsidized by the government and became a main industry of some countries. A notable compromise of ethics to technologies can be seen in this case. New ethics will be established and enhanced in the future with the development of technologies.
In sum, technologies play an important role on social customs and ethics' changes. Given enough time, even comes to some ethics that deeply hold in people's mind, technology is decisive enough to change them.(Given enough time, technology is decisive enough to change some ethics, which were deeply held in people’s mind. 这样是不好些)
限时能写出这样的文章实在佩服啊~我现在写的时候都在不停地查不停的找，呵呵~向你的方向努力！思路很清晰，例子可以在加强一下~你再考虑考虑~~~

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