[a习作temp] argument20 [TSUBASA] by snail8843 [复制链接]

snail8843
UID: 2516929

初级会员

Rank: 3 Rank: 3

声望: 14
寄托币: 833
注册时间: 2008-7-16
精华: 0
帖子: 0

电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2009-7-10 19:58:52 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

Merely based on insufficient evidence and suspicious assumptions, the author concludes that in order to reduce the number of accidents mopeds and pedestrians, the town council of Bamler Island (BI) should adopt the strategy that limits on moped rentals. To support the recommendation, the author points out that after this strategy was adapted by Torseau's town, the accidents involving mopeds decreased by 50 percent. However, there are some flaws in the argument.

First of all, the author assumes that the number of mopeds is too large to bring about the accidents involving mopeds and pedestrians. However, this is not necessarily the case. The author fails to consider that it is perhaps some other factors that cause the accidents. Perhaps the accidents are ascribed to the motors. Or perhaps it is the low quality of roads that results in the accidents. Or perhaps the level of management is too poor to give rise to the accidents. Without ruling out these possibilities, the author's assumption is unconvincing.

Secondly, the author fails to establish a casual relationship between the decrease in accidents of Torseau's town and the strategy of limiting mopeds rentals. It is entirely possible that some other factors rather than the strategy contribute to the decrease in accidents. For example, perhaps Torseau's town council adopted a measure to promote the level of driving skill. Or perhaps the council resurfaced the roads. Or perhaps the council vigorously publicizes the importance of safety of driving. Without considering these possibilities, the casual relationship cannot be well established.

Finally, even if all the foregoing assumptions can come to existence, the author's recommendation is still unpersuasive. The two towns maybe not comparable, BI might not benefit from the strategy. Firstly, the author provides no specific information about the current number of mopeds rented by the six moped and bicycle rental companies in BI one day. Perhaps the number is smaller than 30. If so, the effectiveness of the strategy in reduce accidents is invalid. Secondly, the author fails to provide what percent of mopeds in BI is rented by the six companies. Perhaps it accounts for a small proportion in the overall mopeds. In these circumstances, the author' recommendation is unpersuasive.

In sum, the author' recommendation is unconvincing in some aspects. In order to strengthen the claim, the author must convince that the number of mopeds is too large to result in the accidents. In addition, the author must provide sufficient evidence to establish the casual relationship between the decrease in accidents in Torseau's Town and the strategy of limiting mopeds rentals. Moreover, the author must substantiate that BI can still benefit from the strategy as Torseau town.

已有 1 人评分	声望	收起理由
cnwzly	+ 1	谢谢分享

总评分: 声望 + 1 查看全部投币

0 0

cnwzly
UID: 2634423

初级会员

Rank: 3 Rank: 3

声望: 11
寄托币: 457
注册时间: 2009-4-28
精华: 0
帖子: 1

沙发

发表于 2009-7-13 00:17:58 |只看该作者

Merely based on insufficient evidence and suspicious assumptions, the author concludes that in order to reduce the number of accidents mopeds and pedestrians, the town council of Bamler Island (BI) should adopt the strategy that limits on moped rentals. To support the recommendation, the author points out that after this strategy was adapted by Torseau's town, the accidents involving mopeds decreased by 50 percent. However, there are some flaws in the argument.

First of all, the author assumes that the number of mopeds is too large to bring about (too...to..结构的意思是太怎么样而不会怎么样)the accidents involving mopeds and pedestrians. However, this is not necessarily the case. The author fails to consider that it is perhaps some other factors that cause the accidents.（一句没有内容的话，还能忍受，两句就不太好了） Perhaps the accidents are ascribed to the motors. Or perhaps it is the low quality of roads that results in the accidents. Or perhaps the level of management（管理水平？？） is too poor to give rise（同样问题） to the accidents. Without ruling out these possibilities, the author's assumption is unconvincing.

Secondly, the author fails to establish a casual relationship between the decrease in accidents of Torseau's town and the strategy of limiting mopeds rentals. It is entirely possible that some other factors rather than the strategy contribute to the decrease in accidents. For example, perhaps Torseau's town council adopted a measure to promote the level of driving skill. Or perhaps the council resurfaced the roads. Or perhaps the council vigorously publicizes the importance of safety of driving. Without considering these possibilities, the casual relationship cannot be well established.

Finally, even if all the foregoing assumptions can come to existence, the author's recommendation is still unpersuasive. The two towns maybe not comparable, BI might not benefit from the strategy. Firstly, the author provides no specific information about the current number of mopeds rented by the six moped and bicycle rental companies in BI one day. Perhaps the number is smaller than 30. If so, the effectiveness of the strategy in reduce accidents is invalid. Secondly, the author fails to provide what percent of mopeds in BI is rented by the six companies. Perhaps it accounts for a small proportion in the overall mopeds. In these circumstances, the author' recommendation is unpersuasive.

In sum, the author' recommendation is unconvincing in some aspects. In order to strengthen the claim, the author must convince that the number of mopeds is too large to result in the accidents. In addition, the author must provide sufficient evidence to establish the casual relationship between the decrease in accidents in Torseau's Town and the strategy of limiting mopeds rentals. Moreover, the author must substantiate that BI can still benefit from the strategy as Torseau town.
攻击点基本正常。。加油

UCL vs IC哪个项目更容易拿到全奖博？