[问题求助] Argument 作文求批改！！！！！ [复制链接]

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电梯直达

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发表于 2015-8-24 16:12:16 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

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"Over time, the costs of processing go down because as organizations learn howto do things better, they become more efficient. In color film processing, for example, the cost of a 3-by-5-inch print fell from 50 cents for five-day service in 1970to 20 cents for one-day service in 1984. The same principle applies to the processing of food. And since Olympic Foods will soon celebrate its 25th birthday, we can expect that ourlong experience will enable us to minimize costs andthus maximize profits."
Discuss how well reasoned ... etc.
下面摘自一家冷冻食品处理商（processor）奥林匹克食品提交给股东的年报：
随着时间流逝，由于机构了解了做好事情的方法进而提高了效率，处理的成本会降低。比如在彩色胶卷处理方面，3/5英寸照片的成本从1970年的5天50cent降至1984年的1天20cent。同样的规律适用于食品处理方面。由于奥林匹克食品即将庆祝它的25岁生日，我们可以指望我们长期的经验会使我们达到最小的成本和最大的利润。

The conclusion in the argument is that the costs of the color film processing decrease because the organizations become more efficient and learn how to do things better, and the principle can also used in the processing of food. In order to justify the conclusion, the arguer reasons that the cost of a certain type of print had descended from 1970 to 1984. However, several significant concerns, which the arguer fails to address in the analysis, may weaken the argument.

To start with, the argument claims that it is because of the more efficient and better skills organizations that lead to the success in the decreasing costs. In the same way, the better organizations are the only reason to the costs decrease. Obviously, the arguer fails to consider other more influence factors that will deeply affect the costs, such as the technology, or the economical larger scale. For instance, if the color film processing has produced far more color films than before, the costs will drop apparently. To make the argument more convincing, the arguer should clarify that the efficiency and better capability of organizations are the only or major effect on the descending of costs.

Furthermore, the argument says that the achievement during 1970 to 1984 can also be applied to today. Which means the past events can also be used in future. There would have been numerous changes between the past and now, such as the change in consumers' preference and in inflation. Take the inflation as an example, the actual value of money in 1970 may less than that in 1984, so the costs between those two years may actually the same. It is important to imply that those statistics are reliable.

Finally, even though the cause of the costs and the statistics are believable, the arguer still fails to provide any evidence to prove that the processing of color film and food are comparable. The arguer commends that the same principle applied in the color film processing is also feasible in food processing. However, there are many differences between those two processing, such as the storage, the component of consumers. For example, the color films can be produced in large scale, while it cannot be used to food, since the food will not be able to stay for long time, and the storage of such large items is difficult. So the arguer should illustrate that those two processing can be compared.

To sum up, the efficient and better skilled organization and the long-term achievement will obviously lead to the successful in the decreasing costs. However, the conclusion given in the argument is unreliable, and the argument is not well reasoned because of the logical flaws discussed above.

experience, efficient, because, applies, example