独立习作请问三个选项中选一个的怎么写+习作求拍

hardheadedUID: 3557538

2016-01-24CN 独立写作
In times of economic crisis, in which field do you think the government can cut financial support?
1. Art
2. Scientific research
3. Parks and public gardens

请问我写成这样行吗，怎么改进？

Every country has experienced economic crisis. Today, most governments can cut a part of financial support in certain field to help overcome economic crisis. In my opinion, in times of economic crisis, government will cut financial support on art, not on scientific research or parks and public gardens.

On the one hand, art cannot help the country get out of economic crisis. Creating art usually need a long time. When an art work is finished, the country may have suffered for years, which is not helpful to get out of the crisis quickly. Creating art works also need a lot of money, which should be used in other areas to help the economy. In China, artist's salary is higher than ordinary workers, if same amount of money which was used to hire artists can be used to hire other workers, the unemployment rate will be lower and they can create more product. Finally, many art works can be only seen in museum. However, few people will go to museum because in economic crisis, they will be finding jobs. This will cause few people go to enjoy art works, and they lose their importance even more.

On the other hand, scientific research and parks and public gardens can help a notion recover from economic crisis. Scientific research can create new technology, which may result in new industry. New area of industry will create more jobs, which will lower the unemployment rate and help the country get out of economy crisis. New technology created by scientific research can also lower the cost of products, which is beneficial to the country's economy. Public gardens and parks can help citizens relax when they are depressed in the economy crisis. They can encourage people to lead a better life, which is helpful to overcome the economy crisis. This means that scientific research and parks and public gardens  can help the country get out of economy crisis, so financial support on them shouldn't be cut.

In conclusion, I believe a country should keep the financial support on scientific research and parks and public gardens, while they should cut financial support on art.