本帖最后由 jessicalulu 于 2009-6-5 01:11 编辑
Everything in the nature, a kind of animal or a style of language, has its unique sense to exist or extinct. Languages, as primary vehicles of culture expressions and intangible culture heritage, they not only provide us platforms to communicate, but also convey us various ideas, emotions, knowledge, memories and values. However, does(is) it really necessary for the governments of countries to prevent their own endangered languages? Probably not, or at least, not all. 这一段蛮好。第一句抽象概念引入关键词语言→语言很重要→提出问题:由政府来保护濒危语言是否必要? 我觉得主题句这个necessary要小心使用,题干是讨论“应不应该”,你这里写“是否必要”,好像默认了还是应该保护的,但你的下文将讨论这种必要性的程度到底有多大。我认为二者还是有区别的。
At first glance, the distinct cause of some lesser-known languages are being lost is fewer and fewer people speak them. Nevertheless, to the deep degree, the circumstance is(删) also results from the countries' economic power, the status in the world, and their own abilities to deal with complicated things(这句话很莫名). Thus, from this perspective, languages are not only judged by whether they are popular among people, but closely connected to their countries' overall strength, especially (in)the economic realm. It is easily for these countries to run into a vicious circle, which means the more opportunities to exchange cultures or do business with other countries are cut off due to the losing languages, the harder for the languages themselves to survive which makes the former situation worse in turn.赞! Of course, we can not put the responsibility only on the governments or the leaders of these countries, (呃,这句跟上面连接得比较奇怪)their citizens, as a group use(using?) the language directly, are also an essential element to this issue. A sense of national pride, a positive attitude to their own ethic and customs and a consciousness of the countries' prosperity, all these are indispensable to a nation. Once lost, their languages are in danger. 关于这点,我有点想法哈。人民的民族自豪感,道德和习惯的养成,很大程度上不是一种个人行为啊,还不是主要是由整个国家的政府导向、经济情况和文化背景所决定?而所有的这些,造成语言消亡的根本原因,不就是lesser and lesser speakers啊。。Come on~~BS~~ anyway,你是想说,有深层次的原因在里头哇~~反正我觉得不是特别充分这段论证的~米有把偶说服哇~~
So, to prevent or to let it go, that is a question. 承接得好~有点像某篇ECO DEBATE~~But I prefer the latter. All things has its own life cycle(这句话主谓不一致...), to put simply, the innovation determines the destiny of the material world. During this natural selection, something survive and improved while others such as the endangered languages will become extinct. To some extent, the power of nature is far beyond our human strength. Imagine a country in which the endangered language are spoken, when the government makes great efforts to prevent the language from extinct, such as spends lots of money on propaganda and education, what does the outcome will be? A overall revive or continue to die out? I(am)afraid to say that most situations may be the second one. Firstly, according to the theory, what the government does has broken the rules of nature, which means stops the process of evolvement. Secondly, struggling with the meaningless language would only cut off the approaches to the outside world. How could the country be thriving or at least survive with the language which are only understood by themselves? In addition, even the efforts let the language stands for a while, in today's world which globalization is the mainstream, the use of the lesser-known language is becoming weaker and weaker, finally it must disappear from the earth. Thus, as long as the government's efforts are in vain, it is unnecessary to prevent it from dying.提出问题:保存or放手?→回答问题引入观点→ 语言的消亡是自然选择的结果,即使政府干预也白搭→理由:1、阻断了自然的进化(明显是个循环论证么~或者你改下写法,自然选择是大自然的规律,即使政府干预,也无法根本上改变这一定律?)2、切断了与外界的联系3、国际化的冲击(后两个点点我认为很好,第一点待修正~)但是这段的写作思路挺赞的,很清晰~
However,(连接词用的都很到位,段落间的逻辑关系清晰~赞!) I do not mean that the governments should do nothing to the situation that the languages are in danger. On the contrary, something must be done. As we all know, the languages are the very essence to transmit the heritage of the countries' civilizations, from knowledge on the universe to rituals, performing arts to handicrafts. What's more, the spirit of the nation, the sedimentary culture of the ethnic group and the inter-generational transmission are all depend(depending) on languages. Hence, the governments in these nations should take the responsibilities to make the documents and canons well collected, from literature to historical records, architectures to relics. Even the languages die out from this planet, the civilizations of these countries will remain to the descendants for one hundred years, one thousand years or maybe forever.相当于一个小让步,即语言改保存,因为象征文明~(但是,当一门语言,只以文字或者艺术作品的形式保留,而没有人了解或者钻研的话,那么,这些过往的文明又怎么为我们所知或者理解或者掌握呢?)
Languages do not stand for anything, but they are vital to our human beings, without them we can not imagine what life would be like. However, there are so many kinds of languages in the world and we can do little to drag many of them from the edge of danger, if they are destined to disappear. It is smart for governments, also the citizens, to try their best to keep the fruits of the nations rather than to focus on the languages only赞总结升华!.
但是,看过全文,我还是有点疑问:你说,语言该但是不该使劲去保护,相当于顺其自然嘛,政府保护了好像也没多大用,因为这是自然选择的结果。但是小盆友,题目说,政府应该保护濒危语言。我觉得是不是应该回答:1、政府应该不应该?2、政府为什么应该为什么不该? 你在有意识弱化政府的作用?我不确定这种写法合适不。还是等草木来评判吧~~~拍得真爽!哈哈~~~
就是拍了很久,~~~~(>_<)~~~~ |