尝试了一下另类的开头写法 issue 50

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Why his face again? I always feel confused when this old man come to my TV screen. A professor? A TV-star ? It seems that everyone has such experience when turn your TV to a program about economy or law.

I concede that spend time working outside academic world surely contribute to improving the expertise of a professor or a faculty member .The experience brought from the other fields are useful in today’s combined technological world. Though most of them don’t have such a lucky chance to be guest of certain TV program, it is also a indisputable fact that in most circumstances not only the faculty member himself but also the college and university where he works could greatly benefit from his extra achieve. Especially for the ones who has certain ability ,the consequence is undoubtedly two-to-win.

Aside from the experience and academic achieve brought from other fields, reputation and popularity could also be gained. Assume that a professor was invited to give more speeches in front of overall audience , more and more people adore him, then
somebody he is. And it follows that the university or college behind him seems to be more authoritative and its reputation increases as well as more students like being a member of this university.

But, consider the ones who are still struggling with their academic papers and who have little spare time or the ones-even the tasks from university or college has made him crazy. Should those ones also step into this kind of action? Certainly not. Assuming a professor always dreams of gaining
popularity and reputation and puts his academic work and research aside. What a serious problem .Moreover, though the example above is too exaggerated, whereas there also exist other impacts about this .As different people has diverse interest, we could hardly guarantee all faculty members could focus on the work relevant to their own field ,since it is entirely possible that what kind of field to pursue always are
related to these so-called elites’ special interests. All of that result in the consequence that the promotion of their university or college, if any, was not balance. Or perhaps most of their achievement has nothing to do with their original works. In a word, the recommendation or claim cited in the statement has ignore the feasibility and necessity ,which might lead to a total confusion instead of any benefits.


In my observation, such problem might be solved under a detailed regulation with which we could gain both benefits inside and outside academic work. To ensure a professor could achieve this goal , university could evaluate the his capability to determine how much time he could afford. When the faculty member were found to create less benefits, university must limit his activity outside his work to ensure the regular work. Only with the compatibility of two kind of work ,we could therefore enhance the level of our university and college .

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Why his face again? I always feel confused when this old man come to my TV screen. A professor? A TV-star ? It seems that everyone has such experience when turn your TV to a program about economy or law.（这个开头是够新颖,不过，可能还需要阐发一下吧，到底这个开头怎么引出你的论点? 我觉得开头一段还是必须要拿出总论点的，毕竟这是考试写作啊)   

I concede that spend（spending) time working outside academic world surely contribute to improving the expertise of a professor or a faculty member .The experience brought from the other fields are useful in today’s combined technological world. Though most of them don’t have such a lucky chance to be guest of (a)certain TV program, it is also a indisputable fact that in most circumstances not only the faculty member himself but also the college and university where he works could greatly benefit from his extra achieve(我不懂这个词语呀！！在哪儿见过么？）. Especially for the ones who has certain ability ,the consequence is undoubtedly two-to-win（我也没见过这个，只见过win-win situation).
说实话，这段读起来观点不明确。你的论点是什么，证据是什么，事例有哪些）

Aside from the experience and academic achieve(achieve没有名词的意思吧？） brought from other fields, reputation and popularity could also be gained. Assume that a professor was invited to give more speeches in front of overall audience , more and more people adore him, then
somebody he is. And it follows that the university or college behind him seems to be more authoritative and its reputation increases as well as more students like being a member of this university.
（大学教员出校工作可以获得名声，额？~~~~）



But, consider the ones who are still struggling with their academic papers and who have little spare time or the ones-even the tasks from university or college has made him crazy. Should those ones also step into this kind of action? Certainly not. Assuming a professor always dreams of gaining
popularity and reputation and puts his academic work and research aside. What a serious problem .Moreover, though the example above is too exaggerated, whereas there also exist other impacts about this （语法）.As different people has diverse interest, we could hardly guarantee all faculty members could focus on the work relevant to their own field ,since it is entirely possible that what kind of field to pursue always are
related to these so-called elites’ special interests. All of that result in the consequence that the promotion of their university or college, if any, was not balance. Or perhaps most of their achievement has nothing to do with their original works. In a word, the recommendation or claim cited in the statement has ignore the feasibility and necessity ,which might lead to a total confusion instead of any benefits.


In my observation, such problem might be solved under a detailed regulation with which we could gain both benefits inside and outside academic work. To ensure a professor could achieve this goal , university could evaluate the his capability to determine how much time he could afford. When the faculty member were found to create less benefits, university must limit his activity outside his work to ensure the regular work. Only with the compatibility of two kind of work ,we could therefore enhance the level of our university and college


语言上语法有一些问题，
结构上，中立的态度，没有问题，但是论证过程显得力度不够。

呵呵，我来学习的，不当之处，还可回复！！