lawrencelan的独立作文

pochun111UID: 2608867

To solve problems present and future is it necessary to understand the past.9' F: H/ Y6 ^5 d& Q7 }. ?) L
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People always face problems and need to solve them all their life. To solve problems present and future, is it necessary to understand the past? After considering this question carefully, I incline to answer "yes". I am going to list my reasons below.+ w8 S8 F  I9 [, X
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Firstly, people can know root causes of problems by understanding the past. Knowing root causes help to not only solve problems present but also avoid problems in future. Most software engineers have this kind of experience: they think a problem in an application, which is also called a "bug" in the software terminology, is easy and to fix it quickly, but their changes to this problem usually cause a new problem in future. I think this phenomenon is largely due to having no idea of root causes. If people who fix bugs could try their best to understand the past, like reading the source code revision history and talking with who wrote original source code and asking them their original thoughts, they have a good chance to figure out root causes of bugs and then fix them correctly without causing new bugs. I believe knowing root causes is not only important for fixing application bugs but also for solving every sort of problems.
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, n7 A( {1 C( e% z2 [; f6 S, aSecondly, people can learn lessons by understanding the past. Lessons learnt is also important for solving problems. People can provide constructive solutions to problems according to lessons learnt even if those problems are never met before. People usually descibe economy reformation in China since 1979 like "crossing a river with touching rocks in the river". Because there is no exisiting example for China to learn how to develop economy quickly and sustainably in such a country which has a totally different economy system from western developed countries. It is just like walking in a river you don't know its depth. It's very dangrous and you have to be very carefully  carefuland try to touch rocks in the river to know how depth it is, and then decide how to move forawrd. However, even facing such a totally new problem, China still try its best to understand the past and hope to learn lessons from the past. There were lot of economists, including Wu jinglian, who has been one of the most famous economists as well as members of the goverment brain 这么说正确吗trusted in China now, did a lot of research on the past and then wrote a lot of paper on ideas of the economy reformation. Besides that, China invited two experienced European economists to share their experience and knowledge which they learnt from the past and benefited China's economists a lot. I think those lessons learnt contributed a lot to the sucessful economic reformation in China.
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6 A% q; `' l/ nTo sum up, People can know root causes and learn lessons by understanding the past, which help to solve problems correctly and creativly. According to these two reasons, I think it is necessary to understand the past to solve problems present and future. 总体来讲思路语句都很通顺 但个别词汇显得运用不是很恰当 昨天家里有事 所以改晚了 不好意思

lawrencelanUID: 2173940

3.23Young people should try different job before they decide which job or career they will do in the long term.
There is the one day when young people need to live in the society without their parents' support. They need to find a job and earn money by themselves. They have to start their career path. A question on how young people plan their career path is whether they should try different jobs before they decide which job or career they will do in the long term. I strongly support the position answer: young people should try various jobs before they start their career which they will do in the long term.

First of all, trying different jobs benefits young people's long term job or career. Young people usually know working life a little. They might don't know business etiquette, some working procedures or how to communicate with clients efficiently. However, young people can learn from jobs, especially different jobs. Trying different jobs provides young people different working experience, which helps them to know working life much more comprehensively and adapt working life gradually. Young people can do a better job with this kind of experience. That's why young people who have intern experience in some companies would be more popular after graduation than those who haven't. Moreover, some multinational companies, like GE, Uni-liver, usually set up a "trainee program", which requires those freshmen companies just recruit from universities to working in different internal positions and then to choose a long term position. Those companies recognize that the experience of trying different jobs enhance young people's working abilities, which will help them in their long term job or career in future. In fact, such "trainee program" has cultivated a lot of competent mid-level managers for those companies.

Secondly, young people can learn their real career direction from doing different jobs. Young people usually have many ideas about their future career before they really start their carer path. The experience of doing different jobs will help young people to know which one they really want. One of my colleagues, Tim, who majored in civil engineering in the university, he once was an intern working on highway construction site, and then wanted to be a civil engineer and thought he would dedicate his life to construct great bridges and roads. However, after he tried a job of using computer assistant design tools to design bridges and roads, he was shocked by that amazing CAD tool. He thought it would be a exciting job to create CAD tool. Now he is a senior CAD software engineer and he is proud of his career.

In conclusion, young people should try different jobs before they decide which job or career they will do in the long term. They can learn useful working experience from different jobs, and more important, they can learn their real career direction.

lovemeyouhaUID: 2444191

好东西，慕名而来，先下了再说，谢谢楼主分享了

lawrencelanUID: 2173940

好东西，慕名而来，先下了再说，谢谢楼主分享了
lovemeyouha 发表于 2010-3-23 14:27

你下啥了？？？
都是我自己的写的作文，还处于被人鄙视的阶段，赶快丢掉，别祸害了你。
或者你要留着也行，多看看别人的修改意见。有则改之，无则加勉：）

J印记UID: 2784665

Government should pay more attention to health care issues than on environment issues.
The two most critical issues that most governments(是不是有点点僵硬) are faced with are health care issues and environment issues. We can see governments have contributed a lot of (全文的a lot of 用的有点多，可以换换其他的词)efforts to address these two issues. However, which one should governments pay more attention to? I think the answer should be health care issues.


First of all, health care issues are related to citizens' daily life tightly. Everyone has to deal with health care all the life. In the modern society, health care becomes a very huge industry. Technologies in this area are more developed than before, but expense for individuals in this area has increased a lot meanwhile, which is a big issue nowadays. Most citizens cannot afford medical expense by themselves(.有点累赘哦。。) That's why most governments in the planet provide health care assurance for their citizens as welfare. However, how to set up a double-win health care assurance plan is really a science. This kind of plans should benefit citizens but cannot hurt governments' finance. Governments should consider a lot of factors carefully, like economy development status, population and so on, to make a "live" plan. Even in USA, the most powerful country in the world, the government has to reform the existing health care assurance plan to fulfill emerging needs from both the government and citizens. Another big issue( 第一个issue和第二个issue不明确)of health care is medical accidents. Every year we can read many medical accidents in newspapers.(read accidents 表述不是很确切，可以换成the medical accidents happens every day) Governments and law-makers should contribute(contribute 与to搭配，貌似contribute to 是褒义?) a great amount of efforts on addressing this issue. Such efforts would help a lot of people to keep away from medical accidents in the future. Considering these two big issues, it is really worth for(it is really worthy of ..) government to pay attention in(on) the health care fields.

On the other hand, environments issues become much worse (好像有点不是很通顺也)these years. Governments cannot ignore environments issues of course. However, compared with health care issues, the environments issues are cared by more organizations. Lots of NGOs, companies have been working on environments issues and help governments to address them. Moreover, there has been lots of worldwide collaborations on addressing environments issues, like the global climate conference. On the contrary, there are not so many organizations and worldwide collaborations ont 拼写错误嘿嘿addressing health care issues. To that extent, governments should pay more attention to health care issues.
:)
Taking the evident above into account, it is reasonable that governments should pay more attention to health care issues than on environment issues.

speedzshawUID: 2556376

3.23 修改 by speedzshaw

summeralwaysUID: 2704210

There is the one day 是有一天的意思吗？读起来很奇怪啊。。改there will be a day when young people need to live in the society without their parents' support. They need to find a job and earn money by themselves. They have to start their career path. A question on how young people plan their career paths is whether they should try different jobs before they decide which job or career they will do in the long term. I strongly support the position answer: young people should try various jobs before they start their career which they will do in the long term.可以去掉，完全和上面重复
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, v( @4 X0 X2 d7 EFirst of all, trying different jobs benefits young people's long term job or career. Young people usually know working life a little.
改Know a little about working life.They might don't know business etiquette, some working procedures or how to communicate with clients efficiently. However, young people这里可以改成They了
can learn from jobs, especially different jobs. Trying different jobs provides young people with different working experience, which helps them to know working life much more comprehensively and adapt working life gradually这里最好也用个比较级，与前面对应. Young people can do a better job with this kind of experience. That's why young people( those更好点) who have internship experience in some companies would be more popular after graduation than those who haven't. Moreover, some multinational companies, like GE, Uni-liver, usually set up a "trainee program", which requires those freshmen companies just recruit from universities to working in different internal positions and then to choose a long term position. Those companies recognize that the experience of trying different jobs enhance young people's working abilities, which will help them 可以换一下句式，比如which will be helpful for them in the future .in their long term job or career in future. In fact, such "trainee program" has cultivated a lot of competent mid-level managers for those companies.1 ~+ w- R1 g+ [1 R最后这句话多余，你表达的意思是从公司出发的，可以换一种方法表达，比如是学生受益的。


1 }' y9 u5 {4 R8 l) oSecondly, young people can learn 和后面的direction不是很搭配，换个试试their real career direction from doing different jobs. Young people usually have many ideas about their future career before they really start their carer path. The experience of doing different jobs will help young people (them) to know which one they really want.For example, One of my colleagues, Tim, who majored in civil engineering in the university, he once was an intern working on highway construction site 要和前后搭配的话改成once took an internship and worked…, and then( he) wanted to be a civil engineer and thought he would dedicate his life to constructing great bridges and roads. However, after he tried a job of using computer assistant design tools to design bridges and roads, he was shocked by that amazing CAD tool. He thought it would be a改 an exciting job to create CAD tool. Now he is a senior CAD software engineer and he is proud of his career.0 B5 L9 U' q5 X9 y1 _+ {

  J6 Q/ m% u1 Q& k1 [3 L  I" U5 _In conclusion, young people should try different jobs before they decide which job or career they will do in the long term. 和开头又重复了。。They can learn useful working experience from different jobs, and more important, they can learn their real career direction.! S0 L9 V3 B( S. c)
最后的总结可以改变一种说法，因为之前用到过这些句子，再说一次就有点闷了。加油哦

lawrencelanUID: 2173940

Teachers should not show their political or social views known in the classroom.

Teachers influence students a lot besides that they teach knowledge. Thus, some people think teachers should not show their political or social views known in the classroom. However, I don't think so. There is no absolute conclusion whether teachers should do that or shouldn't do that. It depends on what kind of students teachers face.

If a teacher is working in a primary school or junior high school, he or she should not show his or her political or social views known in the classroom. Someone's political or social views are very personal. They are being formed along with someone's growth. Students in those schools are still in their childhood. They are forming their own values and conception of world. They are easily to be affected by teachers' political or social views, but they have no ability to judge whether those views are suitable for their growth or not, or benefit themselves in future or not. Students in such schools should be taught basic rules of the society instead of some specific views, and they should have right to form their own views. This is one of essential meanings of freedom.

On the other hand, teachers could show their views on politics and the society in the classroom if they are in high schools or colleges. Students in such schools have already formed their own political and social views based on their own growing environment and they have the ability gradually to judge and think about their views profoundly. Students and teachers can have discussions if teachers make their views known in the classroom. Students would learn a lot from such discussions. They would know the society more comprehensively, and then they could refine their views. Moreover, such discussions might force people, including teachers, to re-think their own views and it is possible to benefit the society finally. All of these could happen if teachers show their views in the classroom bravely.

In a word, there is no certain answer to this question: should teachers show their political or social views known in the classroom. The answer depends on students they teach.

wyacUID: 2633619

我是chineseladyUID: 2662783

Teachers influence students a lot besides that they teach knowledge-->what the knowledge they teach to students. Thus, some people think teachers should not show their political or social views known in the classroom. However, I don't think so.额。。这个口语点了吧... There is no absolute conclusion whether teachers should do that or shouldn't do that. It depends on what kind of students teachers face 嗯开头很干练的

if a teacher is working in a primary school or junior high school, he or she should not show his or her political or social views known in the classroom.---> Teachers in primary or junior high school should not show theri politica or social views in class. Someone's political or social views are very personal.同意！ They are being formed along with someone's-->his or her growth. Students in those schools are still in their childhood:L 中学生也是?. They are forming their own values and conception of world. They are easily to be affected by teachers' political or social views, but they have no ability to judge whether those views are suitable for their growth or not, or benefit emselves in future or not. Students in such schools should be taught basic rules of the society instead of some specific views, and they should have right to form their own views. This is one of essential meanings of freedom.观点很好很赞的表达的还清楚，句子偏简单了都是简单句，有重复词汇，语法问题

On the other hand, teachers could show their views on politics and the society in the classroom if they are in high schools or colleges--->teachers in high school and college could show their views on politics and society in class. Students in such schools have already formed their own political and social views based on their own growing environment and they have the ability gradually to judge and think about their views profoundly. Students and teachers can have discussions if teachers make their views known in the classroom. Students would learn a lot from such discussions. They would know the society more prehensively, and then they could refine their views. Moreover, such discussions might force people-->might lead people including teachers to re-think..., including teachers, to re-think their own views and it is possible to benefit the society finally. All of these could happen if teachers show their views in the classroom bravely

In a word, there is no certain answer to this question: should teachers show their political or social views known in the classroom. The answer depends on students they teach.观点很好题材好，正反两方面写。语法加强词汇和句子也要加油

lawrencelanUID: 2173940

For successful development of a country, should a government focus its budget more on very young children education rather than on universities?0 T+ g3

Education is a essential factor for successful development of a country. People agree that almost governments in the world spend a great amount of money in education field. However, there is no consensus whether a government should focus its budget more on very young children education or on universities. In my opinion, a government should focus its budget more on universities.

First, universities publish research results which impact a country's development much more directly. A country's development usually depends on research results from universities on science technique, economy and etc. For example, Mr Zhu rongji, the ex Prime Minister of China, who was in charge of reformation of housing, education and health care in the later 1990s, was also the Chief of business and management college of Tsinghua university. Those research results or papers from his college must impact the reformation that time. Moreover, there are a lot professors who are members of government brain trust as well. Their points and research results play important roles in China's development. More budget on universities will help to improve the quality of research, and then help the development of a country to succeed eventually.

Second, universities cultivate excellent graduates for the development of a country directly. A country cannot develop successfully without a great number of excellent people graduated from universities. Admittedly, students from top universities, which usually have more money and better environment and resources than other universities, are more excellent than students from other universities, and they usually benefit the development of a country more. More budget on universities accelerate development of all universities and help all college students to study and live in a much better environment, and contribute much more to the successful development of a country after they graduate.  

On the other hand, more budget on universities does not mean ignoring very young children education. Children are future leaders and contributors of a country. To that extent, very young children education is important for successful development of a country and budget on very young children education should not be omitted.

In conclusion, both very young children education and universities are important for successful development of a country. However, universities are more crucial in such development because they impact the development directly. A government should focus its budget more on universities rather than on very young children education.

我是chineseladyUID: 2662783

既然3.26的作业都交了 昨天作文怎么没点评呢

tqidtestUID: 2766196

For successful development of a country, should a government focus its budget more on very young children education rather than on universities?0 T+ g3 Education is a essential factor for successful development of a country. People agree that most governments in the world spend a great amount of money on education field. However, there is no consensus whether a government should focus its budget more on very young children education or on universities. In my opinion, a government should focus its budget more on universities(论点清晰). / f  w. e" a: r- D . B8 g+ P2 I! ?  S! a. K First, universities publish research results//researching achievement which impact a country's development much more directly. A country's development usually depends /删/on research results from universities//删/ on science technique, economy and etc. For example, Mr Zhu //rongji//, the ex Prime Minister(不用大写吧) of China, who was in charge of reformation of housing, education and health care in the later 1990s, was (also) the Chief of business and management college of Tsinghua university. Those research results or papers from his college must impact the reformation that time. Moreover, there are a lot professors who are members of government brain trust as well. Their points and research results play important roles in China's development. More budget on universities will help to improve the quality of research, and then help the development of a country to succeed eventually." E; k& L# c4 r# r! L) G+ m Second, universities cultivate excellent graduated students for the development of a country directly. A country cannot develop successfully without a great number of excellent people graduated from universities. Admittedly, students from top universities, which usually have more money and better environment and resources than other universities, are more excellent than students from other universities, and they usually benefit the development of a country more. More budget on universities accelerate development of all universities and help all college students to study and live in a much better environment, and contribute much more to the successful development of a country after they graduate.  (有点绕) On the other hand, more budget on universities does not mean ignoring （very） young children education. Children are future leaders and contributors of a country. To that extent, very young children education is important for successful development of a country and budget on very young children education should not be omitted. （论述的有点粗糙了） In conclusion, both very young children education and universities are important for successful development of a country. （结论处就不要转折了，直接说出自己的观点）However, universities are more crucial in such development because they impact the development directly. A government should focus its budget more on universities rather than on very young children education. 文章结构很清晰的，语言也没什么问题。加油

29# lawrencelan

nexthopUID: 2744929

Education is an essential factor for successful development of a country. People agree that almost governments in the world spend a great amount of money in education field. However, there is no consensus whether a government should focus its budget more on very young children education or on universities. In my opinion, a government should focus its budget more on universities.

First, universities publish research results which impact a country's development much more directly. A country's development usually depends on research results from universities on science technique, economy and etc. For example, Mr. Zhu rongji, the ex Prime Minister of China, who was in charge of reformation of housing, education and health care in the later 1990s, was also the Chief of business and management college of Tsinghua university. Those research results or papers from his college must impact the reformation that time. Moreover, there are a lot professors who are members of government brain trust as well. Their points and research results play important roles in China's development. More budgets on universities will help to improve the quality of research, and then help the development of a country to succeed eventually.

Second, universities cultivate excellent graduates for the development of a country directly. A country cannot develop successfully without a great number of excellent people graduated from universities. Admittedly, students from top universities, which usually have more money and better environment and resources than other universities, are more excellent than students from other universities, and they usually benefit the development of a country more. More budget on universities accelerate development of all universities and help all college students to study and live in a much better environment, and(这个and连接的两个成分不是并列关系) contribute much more to the successful development of a country after they graduate. 这一段用了三个excellent,应该可以换换,比如outstanding, preeminent

On the other hand, more budget on universities does not mean ignoring very young children education. Children are future leaders and contributors of a country. To that extent, very young children education is important for successful development of a country and budget on very young children education should not be omitted.

In conclusion, both very young children education and universities are important for successful development of a country. However, universities are more crucial in such development because they impact the development directly. A government should focus its budget more on universities rather than on very young children education.（结尾可以再改进一下，比如可以把两个理由抽象成两个短语，在最后一段点题：考虑到……和……的原因，高校教育比早期教育更重要。最后和第一段呼应一下：高校教育是教育的重中之重，搞好教育，对社会发展有重要贡献）

写的非常好的，呵呵。
开头不错，引出问题很自然，接下来的两端论证也很充分。
认真学习一下。

lawrencelanUID: 2173940

30# 我是chineselady
翠花姐，不好意思，前两天比较忙，所以就没有来得及改。现在已经改好了。