Jack的IBT特训作文贴!Fighting with Friends

jack878UID: 2650029

In today's expeditious social and technological change, many factors contribute to success----persistence, effort, high intelligent quality as well as high emotional quality and so on. There is no doubt that a good habit can also act as a catalyst to success, Therefore, though there is no inevitable connection between student's habit of keeping room tidy and orderly, I fundamentally agree that the student who can form such a good habit are more likely to be successful.  
     To begin with, good habit is the ladder of success. As the famous economist Keynes said (and I paraphrase) that:" Habit forms personality, and personality determines fate". Student who forms a good habit of keeping room neat and organized could form a personality of carefulness and delicacy, which will be conducive to many aspects of life, such as good arrangement of study and well order of doing experiments or projects. Thus, this good habit can not only help one earns good reputation and respect, but also opportunity to success.   
      In addition, carelessness and disorder may lead to some unexpected outcome. Students who can not tidy their room and make it organized may transfer this bad habit to other field. For example, when careless student conducts a chemical experiment in which a impropriate composition of two different materials may lead to a dangerous outcome such as explosion, we can hardly imagine how he can perform well in the process. Hence, carefulness and lack of good organization may prohibit him from achieving goals.
       Admittedly, there is no inevitable connection between success and habit of keeping neat and organized room. One can look no further than a famous writer who ever plunged him into a messy room. In spite of no hair-cutting and no cloth-changing, and not to mention tidy up the room,  this writer still made a striking masterpiece ultimately which enabled him to become successful.
       To sum up, good habit that seems simple and tiny such as keeping room neat and organized  even exerts great positive influence to one's behavior which conversely  makes people more likely to succeed.

Frankie0616UID: 2763738

Frankie修改~

jack878UID: 2650029

非常感谢你的批改哦，:) 我的语法不是很好，想问你一个问题，你在批改中写到“这边是一个忌讳啊，cannot要连起来写”，我写成can not，我在网上也查，但感觉没说出他们的区别，请教下啊，如果写成can not是什么忌讳呢？   17# Frankie0616

cp19880313UID: 2643174

改好了

tqidtestUID: 2766196

In today's expeditious social and technological change,(in today's change, persistenec,iQ,EQ contribute to success.这句话说的十分客观，但缺乏生动，即便是社会不change了，成功仍然需要以上因素啊，虽然你的思路很好，但是缺乏重点。) many factors contribute to success----persistence, effort, high intelligent quality(试试练习这一句话，不同句式，怎么说会对你有很大帮助的) as well as high emotional quality and so on. There is no doubt that a good habit can also act as a catalyst to success, Therefore, though there is no inevitable connection between student's habit of keeping room tidy and orderly(and their success in future), I fundamentally agree that the student who can form such a good habit are more likely to be successful. 第一段尽量简洁，有些绕。虽然你的论点很清晰，但是说起来并不顺嘴。句式上我还是要推荐uu的作文，句式用到非常自如，看看会有很好的领悟啊      To begin with, good habit is the ladder of success. As the famous economist Keynes said (and I paraphrase) that:" Habit forms personality, and personality determines fate". Student who forms a good habit of keeping room neat and organized could form a personality of carefulness and delicacy, which will be conducive to many aspects of life, such as（这里不用such as 而是另起一句，再展开比较好） good arrangement of study and well order of doing experiments or projects. Thus, this good habit can not only help one earns good reputation and respect, but also opportunity to success. 3 F" [# A) e! V       In addition, carelessness and disorder may lead to some unexpected outcome. Students who can not tidy their room and make it organized may transfer this bad habit to other field. For example, when careless student conducts a chemical experiment in which a impropriate composition of two different materials may lead to a dangerous outcome such as explosion, we can hardly imagine how he can perform well in the process. Hence, carefulness and lack of good organization may prohibit him from achieving goals. Admittedly, there is no inevitable connection between success and habit of keeping neat and organized room. 典型的gre思路啊，但如果没有论证好，往往这段话会让你的论证力度大大下降One can look no further than a famous writer who ever plunged him into a messy room. In spite of no hair-cutting and no cloth-changing, and not to mention tidy up the room,  this writer still made a striking masterpiece ultimately which enabled him to become successful. 另外，cannot 和 can not 无所谓，这种细节上的问题不要太注意，否则会影响行文思路的：））有时间多写两句例子多好 To sum up, good habit that seems simple and tiny such as keeping room neat and organized  even exerts great positive influence to one's behavior which conversely  makes people more likely to succeed.

jack878UID: 2650029

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Students should not take part-time jobs while they are studying in universities.  
Students now count university as not merely a place for intellectual fosterage, but also a stage where they develop various abilities and skills. A part-time job is such a chance to elevate their ability and skill. However, people may contest whether students in university are supposed to find part-time jobs when they are studying. As far as I am concerned, a part-time job is beneficial to students.  
     To begin with, a part-time job is a good chance to develop your social skills. As a colllege student, knowledge is not the mere factor that may affect one's future success. How to socialize with different people is also is indispensable life skill. For example, a friend of mine is excellent in his academic field, while he still wants to outdo himself. Then, he found a part-time job in a IT company where he learned to improve his communication ability. Now, he makes an impression on me that he is eloquent and skillful in dealing with problems. Thus, a part-job will enable students to elevate themself and become more adaptable.
     In addition, a part-time job provides student with practical work experience. As a famous educator said(and I paraphrase):"A efficient way to learn knowledge deeply is integrate theory with practice". A college student may have a good understanding of a certain field of knowledge, but is it sure that he can some practical problem in his field easily? Actually, if a student take a part-time job which is related with his major, he could horn his skills and accmulate pracitical work experience. So, he can become more competitive in future job hunting.
     Furthermore, earning money from a part-time job can decrease parent's economical burden. A  college student should not depend on parents too much. He  need to become responsible. If he takes a part-time job, he could pay his living expenses.
     To sum up, in consideration of social skill, practical work experience, and decreasing parent's burden, students can take a part-time job.

小囧字UID: 2752429

改好了~不知道楼主是什么时候考T哦？
记得给我改哦~~:loveliness:
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1124229-2-1.html
在14楼

伶女UID: 2797207

稍加修改，个人意见哈^_^