【Flyer杀G小组】7月4日 Issue103--By candygege

candygegeUID: 2792059

103."The study of history has value only to the extent that it is relevant to our daily lives."



In my opinion, studying history, namely learned from the past experience, is not unvalued by irrelevance with daily lives.
   First of all, to the extent of individuals, learning from history is good for the development of person's mroals and character, as well as shapes and corrects our attitude. If you want to be a psychologist, the chief condition is how deep you know yourself by looking back your own history, even your family's. What else may be said, most people would agree that these history profoundly sharp your personality. In addition, if children grown up without knowing any family striving history, they might not treasure what his/her owned now, and if youth had no idea about their own country's past, their patriotism would not be deep and they may be confused about citizen's behaviors, even not identified with the culture. Nowadays, nearly every countries regard the history as an important role of education because they recognize the value of it on building children value system. The study of history has a value beyond the daily life. It can teach people in the mentality, personality and morals.  
   However, the merits of history are not reflect on individual cases, but also manifest in the whole humans business. It would seem to be a rather shallow statement that implies that humans only live just to survive rather than planning for the futures of their springs and the environment.
   To study history is to look at a road map of human behavior that has led us to why we are today in the world. For instance, the lessons learned during all of the past wars can make for more effective wartime leadership by avoiding mistakes made by past commanders. Turn our focus on a book, Sun Zi's Art of War, which contains Sun Zi's practise and thinking about wars. This book has been broadly used in many different realms, like business, politic, even love. At the same time, the study of historic wars also let us consider the meaning of the war: what we are looking for and should we bear the aftermath of it, as a results, cherish the peace period we have. The learning of this type of history can directly affects what happens in the future.
   A further example of the value of the study of history is the treatment of the environment and the earth as whole. Looking back on the past to see the effects of the people behaviors on the environment can show us what would happen if no proper measures are taken. The nuclear accidents and the forest fire have been studied to ensure that they do not happen again. And the researches on the extinct animals conduct us how to protect the valuable disappearing animals. The study of oil spills and their effects on the environment gives similar guidance on how to avoid or at least minimize the damage of an oil spill on the environment. The learning of the unvariable temperature can effectively help us deal with the greenhouse effect we encountered today. All these examples of studying history provide values far beyond the worth on day-to-day life.
   To sum up, those people who pay too much attention on individuals' gain and loss, and then they neglect the values to the whole humans and society. This is nowhere more true than on the assertion that individual living in the world can not enjoy but alsoconsider the mentality and future. This maybe the chief merit on what history study provide to us.

yogurt4UID: 198389

In my opinion, studying history, namely learned from the past experience, is not unvalued by irrelevance with daily lives.

First of all, to the extent of individuals, learning from history is good for the development of person's mroals and character, as well as shapes and corrects our attitude.

However, the merits of history are not reflect on individual cases, but also manifest in the whole humans business.



这些句子都有语法错误，这还都是每段的开头第一句话。后面还有很多，我就不给你一一列出来了。

If you want to be a psychologist, the chief condition is how deep you know yourself by looking back your own history, even your family's.
这个例子选取的不合适。例子摆在这里想要说明什么问题？ psychologist的主要任务？

正文第一段写了很多examples来support你的观点： “learning from history is good for the development of person's mroals and character, as well as xxx "。例子很多，每个都是泛泛的提了一下，过于分散支持不够力。

最明显的问题是，你理解的history是什么？你写的一个人，一个家庭的成长历史，能跟一个国家，一个民族的历史混为一谈么？都是历史，但历史也分好多种。一个正文段里把不同的历史挤到一起写，一高一低写不清楚。

后面，你是不赞成题目的观点吧，怎么写到孙子兵法的应用上，”This book has been broadly used in many different realms, like business, politic, even love“， business， politics，relationship，这些不都属于daily lives的范畴么？

At the same time, the study of historic wars also let us consider the meaning of the war: what we are looking for and should we bear the aftermath of it, as a results, cherish the peace period we have.
这里最好把思考战争的意义换成Studying history may help us avoid repeating mistakes.

A further example of the value of the study of history is the treatment of the environment and the earth as whole.
没看明白什么是the treatment of the environment and the earth as whole. 另外这一段给出了很多的例子，其实要表达的观点跟上一段一致。你应该思考一下，支持一个观点，多少个例子够用？一个例子够不够用？如果一个例子够用，怎么写这个例子才能提供full support to the standpoint? 如何衔接例子跟观点？这几个问题有答案了，你的issue会有一个质的提高。

条理还算清晰。注意文章结构。分论点展开比较差。语言更是有问题，一堆病句。

candygegeUID: 2792059

谢谢酸奶
1。语法问题就不说了。。老老实实的去改了。。。
2。“If you want to be a psychologist, the chief condition is how deep you know yourself by looking back your own history, even your family's.
这个例子选取的不合适。例子摆在这里想要说明什么问题？ psychologist的主要任务？”
我这里引这个例子主要是想说明。回顾个人或家族 的成长历史，对于了解自我的重要性与必要性。而这种精神层次的东西是不属于daily life的

3。正文第一段写了很多examples来support你的观点： “learning from history is good for the development of person's mroals and character, as well as xxx "。例子很多，每个都是泛泛的提了一下，过于分散支持不够力。
我本来想要营造的是一种排比的气氛，没有想深入。。这样不行吗？需要深挖？

3。最明显的问题是，你理解的history是什么？你写的一个人，一个家庭的成长历史，能跟一个国家，一个民族的历史混为一谈么？都是历史，但历史也分好多种。一个正文段里把不同的历史挤到一起写，一高一低写不清楚。
我所理解的history就是past experience，在第一段中交代“namely learned from the past experience”，这样定义是不想将其局限在国家、人类历史这一大层面，引出下面的individual。所以在精神影响部分，就从家庭历史，国家历史等方面论述了

4、后面，你是不赞成题目的观点吧，怎么写到孙子兵法的应用上，”This book has been broadly used in many different realms, like business, politic, even love“， business， politics，relationship，这些不都属于daily lives的范畴么？
嗯。我整个观点都是不赞同。但是并不否认它对日常生活的意义。这里提到这个例子的重点也是最后一句话，就是研究历史对future的影响。未来，不属于daily life。

5。At the same time, the study of historic wars also let us consider the meaning of the war: what we are looking for and should we bear the aftermath of it, as a results, cherish the peace period we have.
这里最好把思考战争的意义换成Studying history may help us avoid repeating mistakes.
嗯O(∩_∩)O

6。A further example of the value of the study of history is the treatment of the environment and the earth as whole.
没看明白什么是the treatment of the environment and the earth as whole. 我想表达的其实是“应对环境和整个地球的问题”另外这一段给出了很多的例子，其实要表达的观点跟上一段一致。你应该思考一下，支持一个观点，多少个例子够用？一个例子够不够用？如果一个例子够用，怎么写这个例子才能提供full support to the standpoint? 如何衔接例子跟观点？这几个问题有答案了，你的issue会有一个质的提高。
思考ing