寄托天下
查看: 1126|回复: 2
打印 上一主题 下一主题

[i习作temp] issue103---欢迎拍文作文修改小组7.13作业 [复制链接]

Rank: 3Rank: 3

声望
16
寄托币
900
注册时间
2010-4-24
精华
0
帖子
4
跳转到指定楼层
楼主
发表于 2010-7-13 19:59:39 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
TOPIC: ISSUE103 - "The study of history has value only to the extent that it is relevant to our daily lives."
WORDS: 505
TIME: 00:48:44
DATE: 2010-07-13 19:49:07


It is generally accepted that the study has value to the extent that it is relevant to our daily lives. However, it is of great value to all levels of our world, which contains our daily lives, our societies and the whole world level.

To begin with, people always reach an agreement that the study has great value to the extent that it is relevant to all day just all the time. The history teaches us how to survive even now technologies has been greatly developed and great and thorough-going changes have taken place to almost every side of our daily lives. That's because our way of producing and means of exchanging stem from the history. On the other side, the study of history help us keep our mental health, that is to give us the force of our struggle, the spirit and courage to face difficulties and determinations to overcome setbacks. Almost every have the experience that the study of history gives us a surprise or an idea, especially to people who are designers. There are philosophy and methods that are never too old to help us solve all kinds of problem. Taking teaching as an example, the theory of all students should be taught patiently and systematically according to their individual innate abilities is always a standard of behavior of teachers after the age of Confucius.

On the social level, the study of history provides experiences and lessons to our social lives. Take the financial crisis that swept the world earlier this year as an example. When there are so large groups facing the dangerous of bankrupt we grasped hope of economic recovery from the study of Keynesianism which was published in 1936. Almost every society has its historical heroes who provide the group of people share a common model, also they share the same of culture originate from the same history, that is to say the history helps society to form a unity and preserve its cultural identity. Studying of history is widely used way of patriotism education. When we turn to the moral rules system of socialism, because they all have roots in history the study of history gives us a hand so that we have a better understand of them and examine and observe a more reasonable system.

On the world level, the study of history provides us a lot of ideas to solve global problems. When we have to wake up to face environmental problems that are threatened the existence of our human race, the theory of harmony between man nature which suggested by the ancients, provides us a direction and what they have done serves as a guide. On the other side, border disputes have never been absolutely worked out, which are head-scratching puzzlements whenever, but without research in-depth into the historical origins, there's nothing we can do toward the right direction.

It is clear that the study of history is of great value in the sense that it is helpful toward every level of our human being.
0 0

使用道具 举报

Rank: 2

声望
1
寄托币
252
注册时间
2010-7-4
精华
0
帖子
0
沙发
发表于 2010-7-14 09:58:12 |只看该作者
本帖最后由 alicken 于 2010-7-14 09:59 编辑

It is generally accepted that the study(study of history历史研究是一个整体:,不能省略) has value to the extent that it is relevant to our daily lives. However, it is of great value to all levels of our world, which contains our daily lives, our societies and the whole world level.

To begin with, people always reach an agreement that the study(study of history) has great value to the extent that it is relevant to all day just all the time. The() history teaches us how to survive even now technologies has been greatly developed and great and(even) thorough-going(thorough) changes have taken place to almost every side of our daily lives. That's because our way of producing and means of exchanging stem from the history. On the other side(这段一共3层,用on the one hand … on the other hand不合适), the study of history help us keep our mental health, that is to give us the force of our struggle, the spirit and courage to face difficulties and determinations to overcome setbacks.( the study of history help us keep our mental health: it give us force to struggle, give us courage to face difficulties and give us determinations to overcome setbacks.个人意见既然用排比就把气势写出来) Almost every(everyone) have the experience that the study of history gives us a surprise or an idea, especially to people who are designers. (Almost everyone, especially eminent designers have the experience that the study of history gives us a surprise or a superb idea.) There are philosophy(philosophies) and methods that are never too old to help us solve all kinds of problem. Taking teaching as an example, the theory of(that) all students should be taught patiently and systematically according to their individual innate abilities is always a standard of() behavior of teachers after the age of Confucius.
(
这段一共讲了3层:
1)、科技之所以有如此迅速的发展是因为我们从历史中学习方法。
2)、历史给了我们精神力量,让我们知道了如何去奋斗,如何面对困难和挫折。
3)、历史能给我们意想不到的idea


(1)
和(2)只提了下概念,没有论述,(3)中的孔子好像和idea没有什么关系.
文中也没有详细论述(1)(2)(3)点与daily lives 的关系,比如你觉得这些精神力量、idea daily lives 有关,应该在文中提一下。
)

On the social level(In social level), the study of history provides experiences and lessons to our social lives. Take the financial crisis that swept the world earlier this year as an example. When there are so large groups facing the dangerous of bankrupt we grasped hope of economic recovery from the study of Keynesianism which was published in 1936. Almost every society has its historical heroes who provide the group of people share a common model, also they share the same of culture originate from the same history, that is to say the history helps society to form a unity and preserve its cultural identity. Studying of history is widely used way of patriotism education. When we turn to the moral rules system of socialism(社会主义?), because they all have roots in history the study of history gives us a hand so that we have a better understand(understanding) of them and examine and observe a more reasonable system.(Turn to the social moral rules system, because all these rules have roots in history, and because the study of history can give us a better understanding of these old rules, we can build a more reasonable moral system now.)

On the world level(In global level), the study of history provides us a lot of ideas to solve global problems. When we have to wake up to(感觉很别扭) face environmental problems that arewhich have threatened the existence of our human race, the theory of harmony between man nature which suggested by the ancients,(逗号去掉) provides us a direction and what they have done serves as a guide. On the other side, border disputes have never been worked out, which are head-scratching puzzlements whenever(这半句没读懂), but without research in-depth into the historical origins, there's nothing we can do toward the right direction.

It is clear that the study of history is of great value in the sense that it is helpful toward every(each) level of our human being.


我觉得整篇文章的分层有问题,要分层也是社会、经济、科学、文化、环境等。
最后修正一下作者的提纲:
历史研究不仅在研究日常生活上有意义,它对于人的精神健康(2)、社会道德的完善(3) 和解决历史遗留问题(4) 有着重要的影响

以上只是个人意见,仅供参考。
加油,共同努力

使用道具 举报

Rank: 3Rank: 3

声望
16
寄托币
900
注册时间
2010-4-24
精华
0
帖子
4
板凳
发表于 2010-7-14 11:16:22 |只看该作者
2# alicken
抱歉,你的理解很有问题,有点无语的感觉
不能想象出你对题目的理解是怎样的。
我的观点是题目的说话片面,daily lives 只是一个层面,还有另外两个levels,一个是社会组织,一个是从全世界范围,是纵向划分,那你的所谓的层次又是什么呢?

使用道具 举报

RE: issue103---欢迎拍文作文修改小组7.13作业 [修改]

问答
Offer
投票
面经
最新
精华
转发
转发该帖子
issue103---欢迎拍文作文修改小组7.13作业
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1122172-1-1.html
复制链接
发送
回顶部