frlender 的作文帖

frlenderUID: 2629962

今天的作文，新鲜出炉！

longxue26UID: 2687755

16# frlender

完毕!

有问题尽管找我

同学也辛苦了

mikestoneUID: 2734495

哈哈，修改完了，写的不错。

frlenderUID: 2629962

7.27
欢迎拍拍~

mikestoneUID: 2734495

基本没有改，限于个人英语水平，哈哈，向你学习哈。

wendychuengUID: 2811319

7.27作业修改----by wendy



The advertising is the main cause of unhealthy eating habits



     Along with the rapid development of business activities these days advertising has become an inevitable part of people's life. Although advertising has bring many benefits to people such as informing us of the newest products available, it also imposes some negative impacts on people. For example, the advertisements made by food companies about their hamburgers have lured（好~） so many people to such junk food. Therefore some people begin to believe that the advertising is the main cause of unhealthy eating habits. However, personally I totally disagree with this view.



      There are many different kinds of unhealthy eating habits and the formations of some of them obviously do not have any relation with advertising. So we cannot indiscriminatingly say advertising is the main cause of all unhealthy eating habits. In my mother's hometown, people only eat two diets a day.  From the perspective of modern nutriology, this is certainly an unhealthy eating habit. However, this kind of unhealthy habit has existed long before advertising became common social phenomenon（？广告成为一种常见的社会现象？貌似不太通吧 不如直接说appears） and its formation is probably due to people's lack of food in the old days. So merely regarding the cause of this eating habit, advertising obviously play no role (good~) in it.
   
      Moreover, even for the unhealthy eating habits whose formations have something to do with advertising, I still do not think advertising is their main cause. In most cases it is the people's lack of will power(可以这样说么？) that leads them to getting the unhealthy eating habits rather than advertising and they are always ready to ascribe the cause to advertising. I have seen many people who complain a food company’s appealing advertising while they are eating the company's junk food. I think since they cannot forbid the company from（forbid doing/ to do应该去掉from） advertising, they can simply abstain from their unhealthy habits by their own discipline. As a result, the main cause of their unhealthy eating habits is not advertising but their shortage of a strong willpower.

      From what has been discussed above, we can easily see that some unhealthy eating habits have nothing to do with advertising and even for those which do advertising may not be their main cause.（这个结尾不太好，仅仅把前面的话重复了一遍，建议丰富一下）
总的来说，写得很好，思路清晰，用词不错, 用到不少高级词汇和很好的词组，我自己这方面比较欠缺，学习了。


红色都没了，我传不了附件，给个邮箱我发给你吧

wendychuengUID: 2811319

哎，终于发了，折腾了我十几分钟，论坛今天怎么了？还是电脑和我作对。。。

frlenderUID: 2629962

forbid sb. from doing sth.可是牛津字典上的正规用法！

frlenderUID: 2629962

今天的题目~

longxue26UID: 2687755

frlender同学

谢谢你给我作文的点评  辛苦了

我看完了你的了 有问题就直接找我

加油 大家一起加油!

yezi2010UID: 2722638

谢谢你给我的评论！你的作文我改好了，有修改不合适的地方我们共同讨论，加油！

frlenderUID: 2629962

今天的作文，刚写完

kunterUID: 2687844

改好了   楼主记得改我的哦

cairen1986UID: 2599310

27# frlender



作文改完了

frlenderUID: 2629962

今天作文~